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Funny Quotes

  1. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    April 4, 2020 2:23am UTC
    The start was doomed from the project.

  2. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    April 4, 2020 2:20am UTC
    If you work in the fragrance industry, every now and then you need to stop and not smell the roses, or any other scent whatsoever.

  3. Steve is testing* Steve is testing*
    posted a quote
    March 31, 2020 5:23am UTC
    Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows?
    They're making headlines!

  4. Steve is testing* Steve is testing*
    posted a quote
    March 31, 2020 5:13am UTC
    A scientist cloned himself, but the clone turned out to be incredibly rude. Eventually, the scientist got sick of his clone and pushed him over a cliff. The next day he was arrested for making an obscene clone fall.

  5. Steve is testing* Steve is testing*
    posted a quote
    March 31, 2020 5:11am UTC
    What do you call a running chicken?
    Poultry in motion.

  6. Steve is testing* Steve is testing*
    posted a quote
    March 31, 2020 2:11am UTC
    The oddest years of my high school career were 9th and 11th.

  7. Steve is testing* Steve is testing*
    posted a quote
    March 31, 2020 2:05am UTC
    A zen student asked the hot dog vendor to make him one with everything.

  8. Steve is testing* Steve is testing*
    posted a quote
    March 31, 2020 1:58am UTC
    Space heaters are the perfect housewarming gifts.

  9. Steve is testing* Steve is testing*
    posted a quote
    March 31, 2020 1:55am UTC
    I tried to kidnap a blacksmith, but when I turned my back, he made a bolt for the door.

  10. Steve is testing* Steve is testing*
    posted a quote
    March 31, 2020 1:44am UTC
    A nine year old girl has disappeared after using moisturizer that makes you look ten years younger.

  11. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 21, 2020 12:18am UTC
    I filled out a survey at work. The first question was: 'Functional manager? _________________'
    I wrote 'Rarely if ever.'

  12. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 21, 2020 12:16am UTC
    If an issue is a cause célèbre, but mostly for people who use the term 'cause célèbre,' you can safely ignore it.

  13. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 21, 2020 12:15am UTC
    We say 'I don't know whether I'm coming or going,' as if it were somehow possible to do only one at a time.

  14. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 13, 2020 7:57pm UTC
    You can only wish someone Happy Pi Day once a year. But if you get up early enough, you can wish them Happy Pi Moment twice every 24 hours!

  15. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 13, 2020 7:56pm UTC
    'Do or do not?'
    ... Don't we do or do not already, pretty much all the time?

  16. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 13, 2020 7:55pm UTC
    You say 'chaos theory' like there's some other kind.

  17. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 6, 2020 4:39pm UTC
    If only we were half as hungry for brains as zombies are.

  18. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 6, 2020 4:38pm UTC
    Signs Your Standards May Be Too High
    1. They have difficulty focusing on common tasks.
    2. Their speech is slurred.
    3. They experience increased appetite.

  19. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    March 6, 2020 4:37pm UTC
    The opposite of information warfare is not information peace.

  20. Aggressive Butterfly * Aggressive Butterfly *
    posted a quote
    March 5, 2020 5:35pm UTC
    I decide that
    I want you to be happy with whatever you do
    And wherever you are, I'll be thinking of you

:)

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