Witty Profiles

menu
sign in or join

Funny Quotes

  1. musicure musicure
    posted a quote
    November 15, 2017 3:44pm EST
    in the middle of the night
    in my dreams
    you should see the things we do

  2. musicure musicure
    posted a quote
    November 15, 2017 3:20pm EST
    she's like the sunflower
    that never looks back at the sun

  3. musicure musicure
    posted a quote
    November 15, 2017 3:07pm EST
    we are searchlights
    we can see in the dark

  4. *Freedom* *Freedom*
    posted a quote
    November 13, 2017 3:39am EST
    I was supposed to go hang out with a boy.
    I cut myself while shaving.
    I was bleeding really bad.
    I was way too embarrassed to tell him.
    But I did anyway.
    And he rushed to my apartment.
    With a first aid kit.

  5. Shauna1612 Shauna1612
    posted a quote
    November 4, 2017 8:19pm EDT
    _________________________________
    Counting using your fingers because
    you're clearly quite the mathematical genius
    ________________________________

  6. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    November 4, 2017 4:21pm EDT
    The name of any animal sounds scarier if you put the word 'grizzly' in front of it.

  7. Raxin Raxin
    posted a quote
    November 4, 2017 2:21pm EDT
    I don’t mind sharing gossip, but I won’t spread it.
    quote by Raxin

  8. *Freedom* *Freedom*
    posted a quote
    November 2, 2017 11:55pm EDT
    “You hurt me,” she said.
    “And for the longest time, I was waiting for you to come save me. For you to tell me it was okay, and to tell me I would be fine.” “I’m just here to tell you that I did all on my own,” she said, “And I’m still here.”

  9. MyGerona MyGerona
    posted a quote
    October 31, 2017 4:10pm EDT
    http://robloxhelper.com

  10. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    October 29, 2017 11:22am EDT
    The government that peers over your shoulder can also look down your shirt.

  11. Slim Shadys Baby* Slim Shadys Baby*
    posted a quote
    October 22, 2017 7:31pm EDT
    If the snapchat filters can't make me cute nothing can

  12. dailymotivation dailymotivation
    posted a quote
    October 16, 2017 3:01am EDT
    Folks who want a good collection of <a href="https://dailymotivation.online/">inspirational quotes</a> or thoughts, health or fitness articles and many more like travelling blogs can discover Daily MotivationOnline, this is our open online community of professional writers who having passion for writing. Stay motivated by reading our collection of inspirational articles and achieve your success to new heights. For any detailed enquiry contact anytime at connect@dailymotivation.online

  13. *Freedom* *Freedom*
    posted a quote
    October 15, 2017 12:19am EDT
    "Please," he cried, "Please just come over please"
    "I'm sorry, I'm never gonna hurt you again please come over"
    "I love you, you know I did please come see me"
    "I just cant go on without you"
    although im still hurting
    I just keep going back

  14. *Freedom* *Freedom*
    posted a quote
    October 15, 2017 12:13am EDT
    "you changed" he said.
    how did i change
    because i would flinch every time you raised your hand?
    because i would ask to check your texts after you hooked up with me friend
    because i would sleep on the couch for a week after you had se.x with me after i said no
    because i never argued with you anymore after you choked me against the wall
    honestly, i agree with you, i did change
    but i changed because of you
    not because i wanted to

  15. unicorn104149BFFmusicallychannel unicorn104149BFFmusicallychannel
    posted a quote
    October 13, 2017 2:24pm EDT
    See my pinkie see my thumb see my fist you better run wait hold back you need a tic tac not one not two but the whole six pack. Sorry to be mean but you need some listerine.

  16. xxherexgoesxnothingxx xxherexgoesxnothingxx
    posted a quote
    October 13, 2017 1:06am EDT
    Crap . I fell in love.

  17. Photography3823 Photography3823
    posted a quote
    October 11, 2017 12:11pm EDT
    Some people need a high five.
    In the face.
    With a mallet.
    ~MY MOTTO

  18. quinn* quinn*
    posted a quote
    October 8, 2017 6:05pm EDT
    I wanna wrap you up, wanna kiss your lips
    I wanna make you feel wanted
    and I wanna call you mine
    wanna hold your hand forever
    and never let you forget <3

  19. spiritualindia spiritualindia
    posted a quote
    October 5, 2017 3:43am EDT
    Amazing news for travel lover!! We Spiritual India Tours a leading company in India providing our best tourism in India starting from north India. We are team of professionals here having good knowledge in our field. Plan your trip at lowest fare with our company and for more details contact 9997183888 anytime.
    https://www.spiritualindia.in/

  20. Slim Shadys Baby* Slim Shadys Baby*
    posted a quote
    October 3, 2017 3:24pm EDT
    It's like..
    I want to punch your stupid face in,
    but if I saw someone else do it, I'd knock them out and then attend to your wound.

Join · Top Quotes · New Quotes · Random · Chat · Add Quote · Rules · Privacy Policy · Terms of Use · Full Site
© 2003-2017 Witty Profiles