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Funny Quotes

  1. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    September 26, 2020 2:10am UTC
    Gird one's loins phr. To prepare oneself for a challenging task (for example, the task of girding one's loins).

  2. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    September 26, 2020 2:09am UTC
    The Law of Times. It's the best of times plus the worst of times times 1/(the total number of times) pretty much all the time.

  3. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    September 26, 2020 2:08am UTC
    Listen more than you speak, sniff more than you listen.

  4. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    September 19, 2020 6:33am UTC
    Throxymoron n. A three-way oxymoron (ex. 'work-life balance').

  5. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    September 19, 2020 6:31am UTC
    I feel schadenfreude, but about me.

  6. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    September 19, 2020 6:30am UTC
    Whatever doesn't kill me – on the contrary, whatever has more than once saved my life.

  7. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    September 12, 2020 2:21am UTC
    You say 'evasive action' like there's some other kind.

  8. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    September 12, 2020 2:21am UTC
    Whenever I hear folks talk about gender, I'm thankful we don't have any in this country.

  9. Buzz_LightYear Buzz_LightYear
    posted a quote
    September 5, 2020 3:25am UTC
    7 years on wittyprofiles.

  10. SANDD* SANDD*
    posted a quote
    September 5, 2020 2:12am UTC
    hootin' is the gate way drug to hollerin'

  11. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 29, 2020 2:14pm UTC
    By any ends necessary.

  12. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 29, 2020 2:13pm UTC
    Today, as in the past, a successful career requires sacrifice. And today, as in the past, there's usually a maiden and a volcano involved.

  13. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 29, 2020 2:12pm UTC
    The statement 'A picture is worth a thousand words' is worth 0.007 of a picture.

  14. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 29, 2020 2:11pm UTC
    When they take their clothes off, everyone's in drag.

  15. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 22, 2020 3:01am UTC
    Secret 21.7. Get others to do unto other others what those other others would have those others do unto you.

  16. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 22, 2020 2:59am UTC
    If I do get what I want, should I still try some time to get what I need?

  17. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 22, 2020 2:57am UTC
    Any weapon is a biological weapon if it saves your life.

  18. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 15, 2020 2:04am UTC
    It's theorized that Robert Burns' famous phrase 'man's inhumanity to man' derives from an earlier expression by German philosopher Samuel von Pufendorf – who, with a name like that, would certainly have had firsthand knowledge of the subject.

  19. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 15, 2020 2:02am UTC
    Letter to My Younger Self.
    Dear younger self: That idea you had ten minutes ago to write a letter to your younger self was totally sappy.

  20. TheCovertComic TheCovertComic
    posted a quote
    August 15, 2020 2:01am UTC
    I used to say 'This too shall pass.'

:)

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