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sk84evr


  1. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  2. MsHoran MsHoran
    posted a quote
    September 27, 2012 5:28pm UTC
    Your crush showers naked. Just thought you should know.
    format credit to xCherLloyd

  3. alliecat2323 alliecat2323
    posted a quote
    September 29, 2012 1:22pm UTC
    My life is like a
    romantic comedy.
    Except there's no romance, and it's
    just me laughing
    at my own jokes.

  4. laaurenn laaurenn
    posted a quote
    September 28, 2012 9:17pm UTC
    She wears short skirts
    I eat pizza
    She's cheer captain
    & I'm still eating pizza.

  5. xstories_ xstories_
    posted a quote
    October 1, 2012 6:59pm UTC
    Today was my school talent show.
    Me, being myself - decided to sing "Skyscraper" by Demi Lovato. I did my thing, I sang. And, at the end - people were in tears and I got a standing ovation. I have never felt so good about myself. The dean went to take the microphone away, but I asked if I could say something to my peers. He allowed me. That's when my heart poured out.. "Thank you all, really. Now, I have something to say." After that, it became dead silent. "You're clapping for me now, right? Weren't half of you guys the people who said I was 'fat' yesterday? Yeah. Little do you know, I can't keep my food down because of those things you say. I can go days without eating. I hope you know that." Then, I had to stop because some girls were laughing. I walked up to them and pulled up my bracelets. "Hey, Bri. Look. Look at what YOU caused. Yes, YOU. You practically put these scars on my wrist. Because of people like you, people turn into people like me. Can I just ask why? Why do you do this to me and so many others?" Her answer was this; "Well, Nicole. I do it because people are losers, a lot like you." And at that, I had enough. What did I say? I said, "Bri, I'm done. I'm done with you. So is everyone else. YOU NEED TO STOP. I'm sick of you. If you don't stop soon, something WILL happen. It may happen to me. Or to you. Or to that girl over there. Just, STOP. Ok? Go on and try to tear me down, I will be rising from the ground. Like a skyscraper." I turned around and walked away. I wasn't finished though. I turned back around to face my peers and said, "I thought suicide was the answer. But, I KNOW it's not. Don't try it, guys. You hurt yourself, you hurt your family. And it hurts your friends. Please. Talk to me if you need anything." People clapped so loud, my ears were about to bust. But, WAIT. I'm not done yet... This really popular guy, Mike, came up to the front. He took the microphone and said, "Nicole.. Thank you for giving me the courage to do this." No one knew what was coming, but what he said shocked so many people. "Bri, we're through." I have never laughed harder in my life. Best day ever? I think YES.
    W

  6. Ineedmakyinme Ineedmakyinme
    posted a quote
    September 27, 2012 3:30pm UTC
    Dear 'boyfriend';
    Application For Permission To Date My Daughter
    Note: Please be prepared to submit additional information e.g. psychological profile, DNA samples and admission to polygraph exam.
    1. Name:______________________________________ Date of Birth __/__/____
    2.Height: __ft__in. Weight: ___Lbs. I.Q: __ GPA: __
    3.Social Security Number: ___-___-____ Drivers License: State: _______ Number: _____________
    4.Home address____________________ City: _____________ State_____
    5: Boy Scout Rank: _________________
    6.How fast can you run 40 yards: ____sec. Two Miles: ___min.
    7.Church you attend: ___________________ How Often? _____________________
    8.In 50 words or less, Explan what "DONT TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" means to you:
    _____________________________________________________________________________________.
    9. In 50 words or less, Explain what "Late" means to you:
    ____________________________________________________________________________________.
    10. Complete the following sentences:
    a) If I were to be shot, the last place I would want to be shot is in the __________.
    b) If I were to be beaten, the last bone I would want to have broken is ___________.
    c) The one thing I hope this Application does not as is________________________________________.
    d) In the unfortunate event of my untimely death, I would like my ashes scattered ___________________.
    e)My greatest fear is____________________________.
    11. What do you want me be if you grow up?_________________________________________.
    12.How you ever been fingerprinted? Yes___ No___
    13. Do you have any identifying marks? e.g. birth marks,scars, tattoos Yes___ No___
    14.My dentist is __________________________________ City:_______________ State:______________
    I hereby swear that all the information supplied above is true and correct to the best of my knowledge under penalty of Deah and or Dismemberment.
    Signed:____________________________________
    Thank you for your interest! Please allow 4-6 years for processing. You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not call, write or E-mail. Any attempts at contact during the processing of this application could be hazardous to your health and/or cause serious personal injury.
    Sincerely,
    Daddy's Orders

  7. ThatsSoMeee ThatsSoMeee
    posted a quote
    September 27, 2012 3:56pm UTC
    DO YOU EVER
    WISH YOU HAD
    A SECOND CHANCE
    TO MEET SOMEONE
    AGAIN FOR THE
    FIRST TIME?

  8. sk84evr sk84evr
    posted a quote
    September 8, 2012 5:46pm UTC
    At the beinning of the school year: Ok, this year 1i'm really gonna stay organized. My locker, my pencils, my binders, everything.
    By the end of the second day: *opens locker and sees papers and pencils everywhere* Maybe next year.
    Mq/Mf

  9. BlackButterflies BlackButterflies
    posted a quote
    September 7, 2012 9:01pm UTC
    me: school is going to be great
    me: i am going to conquer my fear
    me: i am going to make lots of friends
    and do really brave stuff
    and everyone will love me
    and--
    me: *walks into school
    me: *sees people*
    me: abort mission abort mission

  10. BlackButterflies BlackButterflies
    posted a quote
    September 7, 2012 8:49pm UTC
    cat: omg i'm never having kittens
    cat: i'm going to die alone with 69 humans

  11. I_Dont_Know I_Dont_Know
    posted a quote
    September 7, 2012 5:46pm UTC
    The only time my phone goes off is to tell me that it is dying.

  12. horsechick818 horsechick818
    posted a quote
    September 7, 2012 6:22pm UTC
    So 3 of the women in my family are on periods this week.
    Apparently they forgot to flush the toilet...
    Because my 5 year old brother called the cops,
    cuz there was blood in the toilet and "tissues" with blood in the garbage.
    hes gonna laugh about this one day...
    we all laughed now.

  13. quiffjumping quiffjumping
    posted a quote
    September 7, 2012 6:45pm UTC
    what if
    for every minute you were on the internet, you burned 10 calories.
    i'd be a supermodel.

  14. DarylJr114 DarylJr114
    posted a quote
    September 7, 2012 7:33pm UTC
    click to see this quote

  15. Mark13 Mark13
    posted a quote
    August 8, 2012 9:36pm UTC
    If Witty were school,
    I would be so much more popular

  16. MyNamesDillon MyNamesDillon
    posted a quote
    August 8, 2012 10:42pm UTC
    When I'm with you,
    Hours feel like seconds.
    When we're apart,
    Days feel like years .

  17. alliecat2323 alliecat2323
    posted a quote
    August 8, 2012 8:33pm UTC
    blacklace
    Ryan Lochte says he's looking for a girlfriend?
    I volunteer as tribute.
    ----------♥----------
    blacklace

  18. momentsinlife momentsinlife
    posted a quote
    August 8, 2012 11:37pm UTC
    that one person who ♥'s all your quotes
    but doesnt follow you.

  19. J3S5E J3S5E
    posted a quote
    August 8, 2012 7:58pm UTC
    I always complain about the girls
    who wear short-shorts and belly shirts.
    But the truth is
    If I had their body
    I would be right there with them.

  20. str0ng str0ng
    posted a quote
    August 8, 2012 8:26pm UTC
    you can either focus on
    what's tearing you apart or what's holding you together.

:)

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