Thishappened Quotes

Miluiel*
posted a quote
June 27, 2014 11:02am UTC

"You know, for being you, Mia, I thought you'd be skinnier."
"Still skinnier than you."
"My eating disorder and her eating disorder are not linked. I don't confuse the two. Don't try to blur the lines."
"Whatever you say, fatty."
Punch.
"And that wasn't for me."
Punch.
"This is for every purge-" Punch. "-and every starve-" Punch. "-and every sore throat-" Punch. "-and every toilet that triggers her-" Punch. "-and ever meal she can't enjoy."
Punch.
"This is for every lie she told herself about how she needed to be and look for a girl her height."
Punch. Punch. Punch. Punch. Punch.
"Still the lies."
Punch. Punch, punch, punch. PUNCH.
"Tired yet? I could do this all day."
Punch. Punch, punch.
"I hope you're bleeding!"
Punch.
"I hope your bones fracture and splinter and break!"
Punch.
"You b/tch!"
Punch.
"You f/cking c/nt!"
Punch, punch, punch, punch, punch.
"I hope you die!"
PUNCH.
"You destroyed her."
"Me? You destroyed her. You still destroy her. You will continue to destroy her."
"I'm not the punching bag today."

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DestinyCaribou
posted a quote
April 23, 2014 4:20am UTC

friend: you sure you know what you're doing
me: i've been to the dentist several times, so i know the drill.

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DestinyCaribou
posted a quote
April 21, 2014 4:42am UTC

i asked my cousin what he thought the DC in Washington DC stands for.
he answered with "da capital".

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DestinyCaribou
posted a quote
March 11, 2014 7:44pm UTC

"Let's put it
this way....
You suck."
- m e t o m y e x

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DestinyCaribou
posted a quote
March 11, 2014 6:53pm UTC

Brother: I have nails and I know how to use them.
Me: I have teeth and I know how to use them.
Brother: I have a broom and I can wack you with it.
Me: I have a foot. You have balls. I think we have a clear winner here.
Brother: *Waddles away*

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ZombiexEater*
posted a quote
December 18, 2013 12:42am UTC

So last night,
I tried to sleep with a blanket over my head, and this is what happened.
Me: Ugh it's not dark enough in here, and I can't fall asleep.
Me: hmm.. *puts blanket over head*
Me: *after about 5 seconds, feels like someones sufficating me, and I can't breathe*
Me: AHH *launches myself up causing myself to slam my head into the bars on the top bunk*
Me: I'm not going to get any sleep tonight.

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cloverchild
posted a quote
November 27, 2013 5:20pm UTC

this happened in class today
me: um excuse me but my pen ran out of ink
teacher: well you can go down to the supply room but you'll need to pay for the pen
me: uh well i don't have any money at the moment, can i borrow one please
teacher: nope, go down to the supply room, you'll have to sign the debt book in your blood
teacher: just kidding
teacher: just red pen

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CaitlinAtTheDisco*
posted a quote
November 13, 2013 3:48pm UTC

In Gym Class
Teacher: Caitlin, you're on team 5
Friend: *walks over to me* what team?
Me: *whispers* wild cats

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CaitlinAtTheDisco*
posted a quote
November 8, 2013 5:19pm UTC

At The Library, Checking out a book
LIbrarian: What's your name?
Me: *standing behind her while she's on the computer* Caitlin
Librarian: *starts typing 'Kat-*
Me: Cai
Librarian: *continues typing 'Katcai-*
Me:...

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CharliesTheName
posted a quote
October 30, 2013 8:32pm UTC

*in English*
Girl: Like, what's the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek?
Every male in the room: *slowly turns head towards her*

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Just_A_Little_Too_Addicted
posted a quote
October 28, 2013 8:58pm UTC

Teacher: So, tell me how
you want your future to be.
Me: Well, I want to marry a
guy and be a stay at home
mom with my four children
Teacher: NO ERIN, THAT
WILL NOT HAPPEN! NEVER
EVER DEPEND ON A MAN.
HE'LL RUN OFF WITH SOME
NEW YOUNG 22 YEAR OLD
WHOSE PRETTY AND GOT
BIG BOOBS AND YOU'LL BE
LEFT ALL ALONE WITH YOUR
FOUR KIDS UNEDUCATED
AND HOMELESS. DON'T GET
MARRIED, YOU WILL GET
DIVORCED AND DIE.

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CaitlinAtTheDisco*
posted a quote
October 26, 2013 2:41pm UTC

Some kid in my school named Cory is running for president so for his campaign,
he had the school play a small edited video of him in front of the White House and
it said 'Vote Cory for President.' and some kid from the back of the cafeteria shouted
'Cory, Cory, Cory, in the house' and another one shouted, 'It's a party every week baby.'

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CharliesTheName
posted a quote
October 20, 2013 5:59pm UTC

Me: *listening to Pandora*
Me: *lip syncing songs*
Me: *accidently sings part of it really loud*
Me: *searches my entire house to make sure nobody heard*

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Mariah Mae*
posted a quote
October 10, 2013 9:32pm UTC

The other day this happened:
Crush's friend: Y'know it would be tradgic if you got on the D team
Crush's other friend: Yeah, trdigic if for basketball you got on the D team
One of my friends: Haha like 'cause it's joke, 'cause there's no D team in basketball haha ha
Crush: No, dude we weren't talking dirty like that. We weren't talkingin' 'bout no basketball, right Mariah?
And I was just kind of just sitting there like, omg do I go on my friends side like I ussally do or do I go with my crush, 'cause he was really talking about basketball. Lol so I just put ,my hands up and srugged my shoulders and me and my friend started laughing so hard.

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CharliesTheName
posted a quote
October 8, 2013 3:30pm UTC

Kid in my class: *goes up to teacher*
Kid in my class: I have a question.
Teacher: Okay.
Kid in my class: *asks stupid question*
*reread 7 times*
Kid in my class: *goes up to teacher*
Kid in my class: I have a-
Teacher: If you have ONE MORE QUESTION
Teacher: Then ask my åsshole because it's the only one who gives a shït.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 75 points

CaitlinAtTheDisco*
posted a quote
September 21, 2013 9:16pm UTC

I had a dream last night about a young, chubby, spanish boy who was around nine years old. He was telling me the story about how he got prepared for school during the summer. It was like a voiceover and then a short clip of him doing the thing he said and then turning and smiling at me. So he was saying how he bought his uniform *cue short clip then creepy smile*, then how he got his school supplies *cue short clip then creepy smile*, then he got his sneakers *cue short clip then creepy smile*, then he got his hair cut *cue short clip then creepy smile*, then last, he was just laughing creepily before he turned with the creepiest smile of all while saying 'then I got my nose pierced.' Somebody please help, why did this even happen?

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dumb_blonde1998
posted a quote
September 20, 2013 10:46am UTC

That moment when one of the girls in your reg class says that the Leaning Tower of Pisa is call the Great Wall of Pizza.

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ChocoTaco
posted a quote
September 17, 2013 7:23pm UTC

Teacher: If you lose your textbook it's a $75 fine.
Girl in my class: But you can, like, buy a shirt with that.
Me: Well for $75 at Burlington I bought 3 shirts, 2 pairs of jeans, a dresser, 2 dogs, a cat, 4 houses, and Alex Pettyfer.
Me: Now that's something to brag about.
Me: Burlington, Brag about it.

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imthebrunette
posted a quote
September 13, 2013 5:19pm UTC

today in school
i was walking to lunch and this random guy looked at me and winked and now i'm scared
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5 n m q!

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CaitlinAtTheDisco*
posted a quote
August 29, 2013 9:07pm UTC

This is Really How The Ice-breaker Went in School
Teacher: Welcome to ninth grade, go around and introduce yourselves, say something about yourself- your age, your name, and a fact about you. Start us off, *kids name*
Kid: I'm *name*, I'm 14 and I play 6 sports after school; football, baseball, basketball, motorcross, swimming, and hockey.
Teacher: That's great! I'm sure you've won your fair share of championships.
Girl: I'm *name*, I'm 14 and I dance hip hop and ballet after school on Tuesday and Thursday.
Teacher: You'll have to show us someday.
Me: I'm Caitlin, I'm 13 and I... like cheese pizza... and nutella.
Teacher: That's... nice.

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