wittyfood's Favorites

xXLollipopXx
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 12:38pm UTC

Nobody's home?
Goodbye, pants.
format by sandrasaurus
from tumblr

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sophsunflower12
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 7:49pm UTC

watching the Olympics
and realizing how lazy you truly are..

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purdygirl
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 7:15pm UTC

click to see this quote

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ADaydreamAwayFromReality
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 3:16am UTC

▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧
is it sad that when the Olympics started I said;
"Happy Olympic games, and
may the odds be ever in your
favour."
▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧▥▨▤▧

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伤*
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 10:23am UTC

"Knowledge cannot replace
friendship, i'd rather
be an idot, than lose you."
- Patrick star
format credit to OneDirection/Credit to Jill

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dawnnosaur
posted a quote
July 28, 2012 11:31pm UTC

SOMETIMES WHEN IM BORED,
I LAY ON THE KITCHEN FLOOR AND PRETEND IM A CRUMB.

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BabeeGurl
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 1:38am UTC

If a guy sang a love song to me
I'd probably fall in love with him
right on the spot.

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aCRYINGsmile
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 9:07am UTC

BOY: GIRL:
I saw her today. I saw him today.
It seems like forever. I wonder if he still cares.
She looks better then before. I couldn't stop staring at him.
I asked how things were going. I asked about his new girlfriend.
I'd pick her over any girl I'm with. He's probably really happy know.
I can't even look at her W/O crying. He couldn't even look at me.
I told her I miss her. He didn't mean it.
I meant it. He doesn't mean it.
I love her. He loves his new girlfriend.
I held her for the last time. He gave me a friendly hug.
Then I went home and cried. Then I went home and cried.
I lost her. I love him.

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Andreaxoxo
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 7:58pm UTC

Maybe I should start
making wishes for relationships
at 6:09

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Dance13048
posted a quote
July 29, 2012 10:37am UTC

Mom; Did you seriously go skinny dipping with your girl friends?
Me; Yeah? Haven't you ever been?
Mom; Yeah, but not with my girl friends.
Me; So you went with guys?
Mom; Yeah
Me; So you would rather me go with guys, okaay!
Mom; When you're an adult.
Me; You're setting a horrible example!
^True story.

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pinkhairdontcare
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 9:36pm UTC

boobs:
the only reason boys want them...
is because they cant have them

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Directionette
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 9:43pm UTC

*watching the olympics*
Athlete1: i haven't ordered dessert in 2 years
Athlete 2: I havn't watched tv in months! theres just no time with all of my training!
me:
me:i just ate at Olive Garden...
me:
me: i feel like a potato
me: a LARGE potato.....fml

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DangerDove
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 9:43pm UTC

Kids Jokes #4
Q. Why did the tomato turn red?
A. It saw the salad dressing!

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bieberxfever
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 9:47pm UTC

Spongebob memories:
Patrick: I'll tell you the story of the Ugly Barnacle. There once was an ugly barnacle.
He was so ugly, everybody died. The End.

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DidYouKnowLOL
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 10:14pm UTC

HARRY POTTER WORKOUT
Every time
-a spell is cast...............10 jumping jacks
- Anyone is awarded points...............10 squats
- Points are taken away...............10 lunges
-Hagrid says "I shouldn't have said that"...............50 jumping jacks
-A painting talks...............15 crunches
- Someone says "He who must not be named," or "you know who"............... 10 situps
- Ron says "bloody hell"...............10 lunges
-Someone cries.................20 crunches
-Someone says "Voldermort"...............10 pushups
-Any pet is shown...............15 bicycles
-A ghost talks...............15 push ups
nmf

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posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

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stephlovesjesus
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 10:33pm UTC

When people ask
dumb questions,
I feel obligated to give
sarcastic answers.
nmq

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starfhish
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 10:54pm UTC

forgeterr's signature format. Please don't remove credit. Or I will hunt you down. You do NOT want to get on my bad side.
Once you start to dislike someone,
everything they do starts to annoy you.

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GlowingStars
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 10:58pm UTC

Never forgets a face,
Never remembers a name

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xXjustapersonXx
posted a quote
July 27, 2012 10:48am UTC

TODAY,
I spent about five minutes trying to get a five dollar bill to stay in my pocket. I then found out my pockets were fake.
Format - xXJustAPersonXx

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