mariahelisabethann's Favorites

happiest*
posted a quote
August 14, 2013 2:17pm UTC

Biggest lie told in schools: Bullying will not be tolerated.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 375 points

dolph*
posted a quote
June 22, 2013 9:48am UTC

If you're my boyfriend you're not allowed to:
• Have candles on your birthday cake
wtf are you wishing for all your wishes came true when you met me
• Kiss another female besides me
You wanna say goodbye to grandma? You better chest bump her and call it a day, boy
• Speak to other females
idc if you're lost and need directions you better get on your knees & ask Jesus to guide you or somethin
• Own a GPS/SatNav
what' you tryna' do? Navigate your way out of this relationship?
• Buy glasses or contact lenses
why do you need your vision to improve? You seeing someone else?
• Sneeze in public
girls'll be like "bless you" wtf girl you're already blessed you have ME
• Eat Jalapenos/Chillies
they're hotter than me
• Buy lightbulbs
i'm the only person that can light up your world. THE ONLY ONE
• Listen to another girl's relationship problems
a shoulder to cry on becomes a d/ck to ride on
• Watch animal planet
you might see your ex
• Wear shoes with laces on
you might trip and fall in love with someone better than me, better wear them sketcher slips ons
• Be good at maths
find ya "X" and you gonna wonder "Y" you're single again
• Drink milk
Whatchu need the strength for? Tryna get the strength to leave me?! No not today
• Spray Lynx in public
next thing you know hoes gonna be poppin' out beggin' for his d/ck.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 478 points

Eli22b

posted a quote
February 25, 2013 4:03pm UTC

-♫♪♫♪♫♪♫-
When everything feels like the movies,
yeah, you'd bleed just to know you're alive
-♫♪♫♪♫♪♫-

👍 this is good · read the comments · 55 points

capsized*
posted a quote
February 21, 2013 1:36am UTC

Put your graffiti on me

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points

funnygirl2
posted a quote
February 21, 2013 1:50am UTC

#1 Things to do in an elevator
Announce in a demonic voice, "I must find a more suitable host body."
fave for more

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 14 points

伤*
posted a quote
January 26, 2013 3:48pm UTC

Fan: niall, what do you want in a best friend?
Niall: everything these four have

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 246 points

AquaBubblezz
posted a quote
January 26, 2013 10:22am UTC

That Awkward Moment When Your Dad Is Watching You Write This Quote
Go Away.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 195 points

CarolinaPreto
posted a quote
January 26, 2013 10:30am UTC

Fact : no matter how many times you say "okay" your parents will not stop talking.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 227 points

Eli22b

posted a quote
January 25, 2013 10:47pm UTC

Someday I want to get reservations at one of those expensive restaurants, like suit and tie fancy,
then wear sweatpants

👍 this is good · read the comments · 146 points

dolph*
posted a quote
January 26, 2013 11:28am UTC

This was posted on Facebook:
bf n gf were siting at a tabel
dey were haeving a conversatein
da gurl sed 2 da boy "bbz will u luv me 4ever?"
boy sed "NO...."
girl was sad she ran away n cryed
she triped over a CHAIR
she was ded.
boy ran over to pic up her body he wisperd in her ear "i ment to say.. ill love u 5ever."
dat meen he luv her moar dan 4ever.
This post made me ill.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 778 points

Eli22b

posted a quote
January 17, 2013 8:00pm UTC

Dear auto correct,
go jump off a freaking Clifford.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 199 points

julia*
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 11:08pm UTC

I told myself I'd stop,
but I didn't. I couldn't.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points

funnygirl2
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 11:15pm UTC

You read my quote -
That's enough social interaction for one day.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 13 points

swimswim98
posted a quote
January 11, 2013 7:29pm UTC

I can only imagine how the 11 year olds today are going to complain about the next crop of 11 year olds.
"OMG 11 year olds are so spoiled these days. Like, when i was 11, I only had an iPhone and UGGS. And I was happy. Ugh!"

👍 this is good · read the comments · 388 points