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  1. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    April 20, 2014 2:11pm UTC
    IM LAUGHING SO HARD WE ARE TAKING OUR MATH EXAM AND SOME GIRL JUST YELLED OUT
    “THERE’S NO WAY I GOT 11 MILLION AS MY F-CKING ANSWER”


  2. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  3. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    April 29, 2014 8:39am UTC
    its kinda scary how your whole life depends on how well you do as a teenager

  4. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    May 15, 2014 2:43pm UTC
    what do u mean “4 minute shower” it takes me 4 minutes to get the water to the right temperature smh

  5. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    May 15, 2014 2:40pm UTC
    Some guy just whistled at me while driving by and my dad goes “don’t worry, that was for me”

  6. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    May 3, 2014 7:31pm UTC
    can i have an extra day to write this paper
    i fractured my motivation

  7. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2013 9:06pm UTC
    The only thing I can turn on
    is my computer.

  8. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    August 2, 2013 10:26am UTC
    *you're

  9. BlackButterflies BlackButterflies
    posted a quote
    July 8, 2013 2:20am UTC
    so yesterday i was babysitting five kids under the age of nine (i know, i know, i'm practically jesus. shhh.) and one of them was an 8 year old boy called Corben. basically, he developed a huge crush on me after i told him i liked star trek and dragons, and he kept hitting on me the entire time and it was hilarious and also adorable.
    alana (his six year old sister): oh wow, you're so good at lego. you're magical.
    corben: yeah, lizzy's so magical that she makes people fall in love with her and wish that they were older so that tHEY COULD MARRY HER FOREVER
    alana: CORBEN THAT IS DISGUSTING, I AM DISGUSTED WITH YOU.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    corben: when we get married can we have a cat? i like cats.
    me: what
    alana: corben i'm never talking to you again
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    corben: lizzy, do you like cocoa pops?
    me: yeah, but--
    corben: i'll get you three bowls.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    me: okay, goodnight you guys.
    corben: mum usually gives us a cuddle before we go to sleep.
    alana: no she doesn--
    corben: shHHhHhHH.
    me: no.
    corben: not even a little cuddle?
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    me: why are you out of bed?
    corben: do you want to read my book about dragons
    me: no, go back to bed
    corben: i'll read it to you if you want

  10. ChocoTaco ChocoTaco
    posted a quote
    June 30, 2013 6:18pm UTC
    Whenever I like a singer or a band before they get popular
    I always take a little credit for their success because I was an original fan.

  11. lovecrazy lovecrazy
    posted a quote
    July 11, 2013 12:30pm UTC
    HA HA HA guuuuys I just got reported and blocked on Facebook.
    It's actually quite funny, so let me tell you. A girl I go to school with posted a picture of her in a bikini doing the duck lips and peace sign saying "getting tan" actually she wasn't tan she's burnt af. Anyway, that bikini is 5x too small... So I commented "The camel called, he wants his toe back." She didn't like that too well uh ohhhh we've got an angry dorito on the loose guys.

  12. ChocoTaco ChocoTaco
    posted a quote
    July 1, 2013 8:00pm UTC
    Let's all take a moment of silence for the beloved website of Stardoll
    Because literally half of the Witty population came here because of Stardoll, and then ditched it a few months later for Witty.

  13. Christina* Christina*
    posted a quote
    July 17, 2013 4:53am UTC
    The Wittians
    They didn't fit in. It wasn't hard to tell from the reflection in the mirror that this place and this life wasn't meant for them. Witty, it was only a website until October 11 2014, the day when all the Wittians got a letter that only they could see. Every Wittian was automatically enrolled into The Witty Accademy and every year there were elections. Three people were elected from each major and only one of them went home. This tradition continued every year until 2016 when the Wiseman Steve was kidnapped and several other students were murderd. Who kidnapped Steve? Was it one of us? Or was it the outsiders?
    If you happened to read this, I am going to write a story. The characters in my story are going to be real people on here. So if you want to be in it leave a name and spread the word :)

  14. happiest* happiest*
    posted a quote
    July 29, 2013 2:44pm UTC
    Can we just take a minute to appreciate Pringles for never lying to us about the amount of chips we’re getting when we open the can

  15. *Elena;~ ♥* *Elena;~ ♥*
    posted a quote
    July 25, 2013 12:38pm UTC
    *Seductively lays on a table* Hey bab-
    *Table breaks*

  16. kristabff kristabff
    posted a quote
    July 24, 2013 8:28pm UTC
    Me: Hey friends party at my place tonight!! We're totally gonna raise the roof ok
    Friends: Okay yayy
    Friends: ~later arrive at party~
    Me: Alright here are your hard helmets and safety goggles and the cranes will be here any minute now, can't wait to get this roof removed LOLLLLLL!1!!1!!!

  17. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    July 28, 2013 12:03pm UTC
    There are six basic types of fear.
    1. terror
    2: panic
    3. 3 text messages and fourteen missed calls from mom
    4: username or password is incorrect
    5. we need to talk
    6: internet connecction unavailable

  18. Zoë* Zoë*
    posted a quote
    July 29, 2013 6:00pm UTC
    North West: Daddy, what are you famous for?
    Kanye: Rapping.
    North West: Mummy, what are you famous for?
    *awkward silence*

  19. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    July 29, 2013 11:48pm UTC
    Reasons I don't like Justin Bieber
    1) He said that r.ape happens for a reason
    2) At Anne Frank's house, he wrote in the guestbook that he hoped "she would have been a Belieber"
    3) When asked to try being vegan, he spit out the vegan steak that was specially ordered for him
    4) He makes his fans pay tons of money to see him live, even though he could afford having the tickets be $50 instead of $100 dollars for mezzanine seats
    5) Once, he went to a childrens hospital in England and made them clear the area so he wouldn't have to wait near the sick children. He spent about 5 minutes with the children while the cameras were around and then left as soon as they wre gone.
    6) He peed in a restaurant kitchen
    7) Once, he faked a really bad asthma attack and the paramedics were called. He then proceeded to laugh is a.ss off when they came through the door. His people talked the paramedics into not saying anything because, apparently, you can go to jail for that.
    8) He wanted to go to a mall, once, and when the car came he sent it back because he didn't like the color. He then spent only 5 minutes at the mall before leaving and saying it was the sh ittiest mall he'd ever been to.
    9) He didn't show up to one of his concerts until half way through the scheduled time
    10) He's quoted to having screamed, "F.uck Bill Clinton" to cameras
    11) He attacked a paparazzi, who is suing.
    12) When he went to Vermont, he was kicked out of every business he went to (IHOP, Hannaford, Walmart, etc.)
    13) At a movie theater, he threw a huge temper tantrum when he was told that he couldn't bring his Subway sandwich into the movie, since it was against the rules. He made a mess in the theater and was carried out by one of his bodyguard, kicking and screaming.
    14) Once, he randomly showed up to Disney unannounced and demanded that the entire Yachtsman Steakhouse be cleared- reservations cancelled and all- so that he could eat there. The staff had to call every single one of the guests to tell them that their reservations they had been planning for months were cancelled and wasn’t allowed to give them an explanation. Disney also decided that it wasn’t fair to their guests and gave them free dinner at another restaurant, which obviously lost them a lot of money and business for that night.
    15) He spit on his fans
    I don't dislike him because of his voice or his music. I dislike him because he is a terrible human being.

  20. KT_143 KT_143
    posted a quote
    June 12, 2013 1:50pm UTC
    I want a tampon commercial where the woman are fighting zombies or some sh.t.
    And they're all beat up and bloody and shoving tampons into bullet wounds to stop the bleeding.
    And I want one of the ladies to full-on decapitate a zombie with a machete or maybe a scythe.
    And then I want her to look directly at the camera with blood running from an open wound on her forehead and say,
    "For the fighting spirit."
    It would be called the Tampocalypse.
    Because periods aren't all 'Let me parade around in my motherf.cking white bikini at the beach
    while doing back flips and faffing about through a field of daisies.
    IT'S LITERALLY A BLOODBATH!
    IT'S A WAR!
    IF YOU GET IN MY WAY, F.CKER I WILL KNOCK YOU OUT!
    Tampocalypse

:)

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