Witty Profiles

menu
sign in or join

TheseWords

  1. WeAreTheBoys WeAreTheBoys
    posted a quote
    November 4, 2012 2:12pm UTC
    I take super hot showers because I like to practice burning in hell.

  2. DoodleLove DoodleLove
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 6:05pm UTC
    If my ceiling fan could hold my weight,
    I'd never be bored again.
    nmf/nmq

  3. Official1DArmy Official1DArmy
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 6:13pm UTC
    i have always wanted to turn around in a swivel chair saying, "ive been expecting you..."

  4. iloveyou731 iloveyou731
    posted a quote
    September 21, 2012 2:12pm UTC
    Painting yourself green
    and lying out in the sun with the hope that you'll photosynthesise after your mother tells you to make your own food.

  5. Jasmine112 Jasmine112
    posted a quote
    September 21, 2012 2:00pm UTC
    If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money id just laugh and search with them

  6. yourcool yourcool
    posted a quote
    September 21, 2012 5:33pm UTC
    next time I am alone and a stranger comes up to me,
    I am just going to stand their shocked and whisper quietly,
    "you can see me?"

  7. wishicouldfindyou wishicouldfindyou
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 8:11pm UTC
    "You're beautiful"
    I say as I trail my crusor down your face
    tumblr

  8. hithurrimjohnny hithurrimjohnny
    posted a quote
    September 16, 2012 7:57pm UTC
    FORMAT JIMMY365

    Whenever I have a problem
    I just sing, but then I realize,
    my voice is a lot worse
    Then my p r o b l e m .


  9. jimmy365 jimmy365
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 4:47pm UTC
    My friends: wow what a perfect morning for a run
    Me: wow what a perfect morning to go the heck back to sleep

  10. yourcool yourcool
    posted a quote
    September 21, 2012 5:43pm UTC
    No matter how good you are at something
    there will always be an 8 year old Asian kid that is better.

  11. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    September 20, 2012 2:42pm UTC
    BravoSierra's format
    How to Create an Ugly Child
    A book by my parents

  12. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    September 20, 2012 3:15pm UTC
    BravoSierra's format
    My days are backwards.
    I wake up tired and go to bed wide awake.

  13. greysonchick greysonchick
    posted a quote
    September 18, 2012 8:38pm UTC
    click to see this quote

  14. yourcool yourcool
    posted a quote
    September 21, 2012 4:54pm UTC
    how to kill a spider:
    Get a tissue,
    approach it slowly,
    and very carefully,
    burn the house down.

  15. jimmy365 jimmy365
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 4:36pm UTC
    omg just imagine
    a l l t h e s t u p i d j o k e s t h a t p e o p l e a r e g o n n a m a k e
    a f t e r t h e w o r l d d o e s n ' t e n d i n 2 0 1 2

  16. jimmy365 jimmy365
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 8:44pm UTC
    Me: Hey can I borrow a pencil?
    Student: Yeah but it doesn't have an eraser
    Me: Life doesn't have an eraser
    Student: That was deep, man
    n m q

  17. jimmy365 jimmy365
    posted a quote
    September 17, 2012 5:02pm UTC
    do you ever
    FEEL BUGS ON YOU WHEN THERE ARE NO BUGS THERE?
    T H E Y ' R E T H E G H O S T S O F B U G S Y O U ' V E K I L L E D

  18. DoodleLove DoodleLove
    posted a quote
    September 22, 2012 9:45pm UTC
    I've never been skydiving, but I've
    zoomed-in on google Earth really fast.
    Nmf/nmq

  19. iridescentstorm iridescentstorm
    posted a quote
    September 16, 2012 10:33am UTC
    Sorry,
    your password must contain numbers,
    the entire alphabet,
    your left foot,
    a theme song to a TV show,
    and the blood of your enemies.
    ... Am I creating a password or a horcrux?
    not mine, tumblr

  20. Arilena :)* Arilena :)*
    posted a quote
    September 15, 2012 5:11am UTC
    Mum: Can I use your computer?
    Me: Sure.
    Me: *Deletes History*
    Me: *Logs out of every website*
    Me: *Double checks deleted History*
    Me: *Closes Chrome*
    Me: *Opens Internet Explorer*
    Me: Here you go. *stands over her shoulder entire time.*

:)

Join · Top Quotes · New Quotes · Random · Chat · Add Quote · Rules · Privacy Policy · Terms of Use · Full Site
© 2003-2024 Witty Profiles