jahn79* · 8 years ago
Violence is never the victims fault. Forgiveness is your s to give not there's to take.
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seafoam* · 8 years ago
Does she put the blame on you for what happened? :\
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Dishonored* · 8 years ago
nah, nothing like that. it's more of a she puts the blame on herself, but also not really that either. she blames herself for letting the guy get away with it. plus just the fact that it happened is upsetting for her? I think she has had a bad history with men, so that is probably why. it's like, she doesn't blame me for that, but I feel like it is my fault that she drinks then- so it kinda is my fault. Idk, that might not make sense.
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seafoam* · 8 years ago
It is not one bit your fault. You never asked for something so s.hitty to happen to you. Nobody asks for r.ape. Your mom probably does feel guilty that she couldn't protect you, as is a mother's duty, but we don't always have control over life's turn of events. This was out of her control and yours as well. You both have to understand this in order to be rid of the burden of self-imposed responsibility; alcohol won't do it. The only person at fault is the person who did this to you. You do not have to, and should not, by any means, let him get away with it, either. You couldn't stop it from happening to you, but you can stop it from possibly happening to a few others at the hands of this sick individual. Reporting something like this isn't easy, but what is right and necessary isn't always easy.
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Dishonored* · 8 years ago
I was going to report it, but the cops here are.. nkt very sensitive towards this kinda thing. My cousin was r.aped at prom one year, and the cops met her at the emergency room, and specifically told her not to report. I feel it was actually more of a threat, like "he's a well liked boy with a promising future and ties to the community.. you're a girl that had s.ex for the first time, regretted it, and now crying r.ape. you will regret reporting.." That was all the night it happened, at the hospital, where they could have gotten evidence. My evidence a year later is a text that says "sorry bout the r.ape."
Also: I never got the notification that you replied back, baaahhh.
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seafoam* · 8 years ago
That's so f.ucked up. Law enforcement is just as disgusting as perpetrators sometimes.
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Dishonored* · 8 years ago
Pretty much. It's a bunch of "we can't do anything until something happens" and then "we can't do anything until there is concrete proof" and even then it's "well.. I mean, you could press charges.. BUT they are a promising kid with a bright future.. do you really want to be responsible for ending that??" So slimey
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seafoam* · 8 years ago
Lmao. He jeopardized his own ''bright future'' when he chose to do something that could potentially affect someone else's. People need to stop giving sympathy where it's completely unwarranted and undeserved and instead direct it where it is, TO THE F.UCKING VICTIM.
I'm so sorry that they aren't giving your case the compassion and attention it deserves, but do not be intimidated or discouraged into silence. Don't be tricked into thinking you're wrong or unfair or guilty of anything. You have the right to talk about what happened to you and who was responsible. Screw your police department and screw him.
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Dishonored* · 8 years ago
I try to talk about it a lot without people getting too annoyed. I've posted screenshots with his entire name included from facebook where he admitted to it (and then took it back.. again.. yet I'm the untrustworthy one because I didn't say anything until awhile after the fact.) I actually want to get a restraining order, because of stalking, but I feel like that is a huge waste of time going to authorities for because there is too many ways they can spin it back on me by "provoking" it.
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seafoam* · 8 years ago
You didn't provoke anything. You're just trying to keep yourself safe and recover from a traumatic ordeal.
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