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dolph*
posted a quote
July 13, 2013 4:16pm UTC

Tom Hanks masturbates
Tom Wanks
Tom Hanks punishes his kids
Tom Spanks
Tom Hanks says grace at dinner
Tom Thanks
Tom Hanks needs to deposit money
Tom Banks
Tom Hanks plays Tug-o-War
Tom Yanks
Tom Hanks can't remember
Tom Blanks
Tom Hanks stabs a bloke
Tom Shanks
Tom Hanks takes a boat ride
Tom Cruise

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 102 points

dolph*
posted a quote
July 13, 2013 1:37pm UTC

the day is january 1st, 3009
a group of humans listen to boom boom pow
when fergie says that she is so 3008 they all stand shocked and realise..
...fergie is now behind the times
fergie herself has become 2000 and late
this is unbelievable news to the humans
hours later the planet descends into war and chaos.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 89 points

happiest*
posted a quote
July 13, 2013 5:29pm UTC

Parents: Don't talk to strangers online.
Teachers: Don't talk to strangers online.
Everyone: Don't talk to strangers online.
Me: They aren't strangers if we're in the same fandom.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 159 points

bye*
posted a quote
July 12, 2013 11:04am UTC

omegle Talk to strangers!
You: hey
Stranger: hey
Stranger: what are you wearing
You: clothes
Stranger: no
Stranger: do it sexy
You: *whispers in sexy voice* clothes.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 135 points

Cammie
posted a quote
June 11, 2013 10:26pm UTC

can't wait for summer
where sunday nights aren't depressing.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 112 points

Rajsonkar
posted a quote
June 11, 2013 7:39pm UTC

Don't mess with people
who have bad picstures of
you.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 65 points

yourcool
posted a quote
June 11, 2013 7:29pm UTC

i can guarantee you that the only part of
college i will enjoy is walking out of my dorm and seeing hot guys also come out of their dorm just in their boxers, about to take a shower, or just getting out of the shower.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 99 points

gab*
posted a quote
June 11, 2013 7:20pm UTC

deaR iPod, i said 'sHuffLe',
not line up 20 songs in a row that i don't want to listen to.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 100 points

yourcool
posted a quote
June 11, 2013 7:33pm UTC

all restaurants are drive thru's
if you drive heard enough

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 114 points

CharliesTheName
posted a quote
June 11, 2013 6:55pm UTC

Going out in public with my mom:
Mom: Come on, let's go.
Me: Can I bring some friends?
Mom: That's fi-
Me: .....
Mom: .....
Me: .....
Mom: Put the poster back.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 117 points

kristabff
posted a quote
June 5, 2013 9:52pm UTC

Humans are way too smart.
We know to much. We understand the way things are created and why living things do things they do and much much much more, and that's scary. We have theories of how our universe is created, and it's kind of ruining our lives. We're too familiar with the theories and facts and it takes away the mystery, therefore taking away alot of our imaginations and worrying about unecessary things, like the origin of our universe or where we go after we die. We can't live in the present, we can't apprechaite anything. We are always thinking about the future and the past.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 174 points

ChocoTaco
posted a quote
June 1, 2013 7:59pm UTC

By the time I die
I hope we have the technology to put gifs on gravestones.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 219 points

steffykins
posted a quote
May 30, 2013 7:37pm UTC

Here's to the girls, who don't wake up with perfect hair.
Who don't wear 50 pounds of make-up.
Who would rather spend a day in sweatpants rather than skinny jeans.
Who aren't "popluar" but feel like it when they're with their friends.
Who stick to sneakers instead of heels.
Who aren't afraid to break a nail.
Who don't always get their way.
Who don't get everything they want.
Here's to all of the girls that are just like me.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 60 points

BlackButterflies
posted a quote
May 31, 2013 5:52am UTC

today my friend ran up to me and said "hey i went to the mall yesterday and i saw a t-shirt that said 'psycho but cute' on it and i thought of you." and then he just turned and walked away before i could react.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 143 points

ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
May 31, 2013 2:23pm UTC

It’s the kind of
intimacy
that you just can’t fake.
It’s the kind of intense, supernatural feeling
that only comes around
when all a person needs to do is
brush a fingertip against your arm,
and you feel like you may never
breathe again.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 290 points

ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
May 31, 2013 2:31pm UTC

we all have that boy
He’s the boy we try to pretend we aren’t looking for
as we make our way to class.
He’s the boy that we lie about
and claim to not care about anymore.
He’s the boy that gives you the cliche butterflies,
complete with the weakness in the knees...

👍 this is good · read the comments · 583 points

ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
May 31, 2013 2:16pm UTC

making a joke
in front of a ton of people
and having them all crack up
is one if the most beautiful feelings
you’ll ever feel.
Don’t deny it.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 622 points

chickittylover
posted a quote
May 30, 2013 7:29pm UTC

Format chickittylover
Those songs
that give you tons of memories,
and make you
→cry.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 136 points

dolph*
posted a quote
May 30, 2013 1:55pm UTC

Mum: wake up
Me: *maybe if I pretend i'm dead she'll go away*

👍 this is good · read the comments · 141 points

Rajsonkar
posted a quote
May 30, 2013 7:04pm UTC

That feeling of
awesomeness
when you prove
your teacher
wrong.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 191 points

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