aDrew13's Favorites

BravoSierra
posted a quote
April 6, 2013 3:33pm UTC

BravoSierra's format
Perks of being my friend:
You can stand next to me and look 100 times more attractive.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 222 points

Ash_leigh*
posted a quote
April 7, 2013 1:36pm UTC

Doctor: The more colorful your diet is, the healthier you will be.
Me: *eats bag of jellybeans*
Me: Nailed it

👍 this is good · read the comments · 314 points

伤*
posted a quote
April 2, 2013 2:56pm UTC

Giving someone another chance
is like giving them another bullet
because they missed the first time

👍 this is good · read the comments · 388 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
April 9, 2013 3:24pm UTC

"i'm so fat!"
I scream as I shove a brownie, pizza, my neighbors cat, two oak trees, a small country into my mouth
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5

👍 this is good · read the comments · 534 points

happiest*
posted a quote
March 12, 2013 4:09pm UTC

me: does one sit-up
me: checks for abs

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 112 points

Loopy23
posted a quote
March 15, 2013 8:39pm UTC

Me:*goes to open energy drink*
Energy drink: Wouldn't it be funny if...
Energy drink: I fizzed all over...
Energy drink: Your white shirt?
Me:
Me:
Me: Not really.
Energy drink: Fizzes over me
Me: -_____-

👍 this is good · read the comments · 157 points

happiest*
posted a quote
March 12, 2013 4:16pm UTC

me: I really need to make some big changes in my life...
me:
me:
me:
me: *Changes profile pic*

👍 this is good · read the comments · 128 points

wasted_wishes
posted a quote
March 15, 2013 6:56pm UTC

I'm sorry, what language are you speaking?
It sounds like bullsh*t.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 146 points

HakunaaMatata
posted a quote
March 12, 2013 5:24pm UTC

The best relationships
usually begin
unexpectedly.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 148 points

sammy*
posted a quote
March 16, 2013 12:55pm UTC

And then it hits me :
You are smiling, you are laughing, you are happy.
+++
But it's not because of me.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 231 points

elisabethelis
posted a quote
March 15, 2013 2:38pm UTC

The worst part about being sad?
You don't even know what makes you happy anymore.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 225 points

sammy*
posted a quote
March 12, 2013 6:49pm UTC

I still like you, i'm just tired of trying.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 231 points

ChocoTaco
posted a quote
March 15, 2013 5:43pm UTC

Me when my friends are sad: *Insert 9 page text here of advice and telling them how perfect they are.*
Them when I'm sad: Oh I'm sorry.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 247 points

yourcool
posted a quote
March 13, 2013 3:05pm UTC

the sexiest thing about smoking cigarettes
is the part where you don't smoke them at all.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 350 points

yourcool
posted a quote
March 13, 2013 3:09pm UTC

i hate it when i say i hate everyone
and then someone is just like "oh expect me of course lol"
ha ha no. especially you.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 481 points

sammy*
posted a quote
March 11, 2013 4:53pm UTC

do you ever just sit there and look at yourself and examine
every single detail about yourself and just get really upset
because you're you

👍 this is good · read the comments · 479 points

Sabina*
posted a quote
March 2, 2013 9:30pm UTC

Teacher: From all this talking, I assume you're done
Me: From all this complaining, I assume you're single

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 179 points

polinaagoldberg*
posted a quote
January 18, 2013 9:42pm UTC

Website: Please verify that you are human
Me: Damnit. You got me, I'm a vacuum cleaner

👍 this is good · read the comments · 484 points

Waffle
posted a quote
January 25, 2013 6:00pm UTC

I think its time to shave my legs
"MOTHER, FETCH THE LAWN MOWER"

👍 this is good · read the comments · 806 points

Cammie
posted a quote
January 26, 2013 8:06pm UTC

Where can I buy skinny genes?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 688 points

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aDrew13