RyansWitty's Favorites

Raining_Sunshine
posted a quote
October 26, 2012 9:00pm UTC

So today in class,
This hot guy picked up a piece of my hair and started singing,
"Soft kitty,
Warm kitty,
Little ball of fur.
Happy kitty,
Sleepy kitty,
Purr, purr, purr."
And I was just sitting there like,
"Lol, wtf is going on right now."

👍 this is good · read the comments · 995 points

TheGirlWhoLived*
posted a quote
October 26, 2012 4:59pm UTC

R.I.P
to all the people who die everyday and aren't acknowledged because they aren't celebrities.....
nmq

👍 this is good · read the comments · 556 points

itsamadworld
posted a quote
October 26, 2012 3:11pm UTC

click to see this quote

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JustAnotherWittyGuy18
posted a quote
October 26, 2012 6:10pm UTC

click to see this quote

👍 this is good · read the comments · 797 points

Kanerpop
posted a quote
October 26, 2012 1:16pm UTC

"Class Rules!"
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D- I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago..
WINNIE: Me!
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with 'I.'
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.
TEACHER: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
Fav for another seiries of "Class Rules!"

👍 this is good · read the comments · 736 points

lovecrazy
posted a quote
October 26, 2012 3:10pm UTC

Seeing a boy younger than you,
and thinking "Damn, you're gonna be fine." then mentally yelling at yourself for being a creep.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1344 points

Arilena :)*
posted a quote
October 27, 2012 12:06pm UTC

Dad : I want you to marry a girl of my choice.
Son : No
Dad : The girl is Bill Gates' daughter.
Son : Then it's okay
Dad goes to Bill gates.
Dad : I want your daughter to marry my son.
Bill Gates : No
Dad : My son is the CEO of World Bank
Bill Gates : Then it's okay.
Dad goes to President of World Bank
Dad : Appoint my son as CEO of your bank.
President : No
Dad : He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates.
President : Then it's okay
This is BUSINESS

👍 this is good · read the comments · 684 points

KatieeLovesYouu
posted a quote
September 9, 2012 11:36am UTC

click to see this quote

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hockeyjones17
posted a quote
September 8, 2012 8:16pm UTC

Hey, do me a favor?
Press the ♥ button,
Then press ctrl W,
and laugh.
not my format.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 501 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
September 8, 2012 1:31pm UTC

"I'm just gonna rest my eyes for five minutes"
*wakes up february 5, 2069*
f o r m a t b y j i m m y 3 6 5

👍 this is good · read the comments · 546 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
September 8, 2012 2:58pm UTC

Teacher: Alright it's time to take attendance
Me: Okay I got this
Teacher: *calls your name*
Me: Here
Me: nailed it

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1603 points

sjtrue
posted a quote
August 31, 2012 12:52pm UTC

I am sick of apologizing
for
everything.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 19 points

now delicate_disaster*
posted a quote
August 30, 2012 6:29pm UTC

* every teacher before they have to draw something on the board *
"I'm not an artist but..."

👍 this is good · read the comments · 471 points

gurlygirl217
posted a quote
August 30, 2012 3:03pm UTC

On December 21,
2012, I want to
get a text saying,
"If the world ends today,
I just want you to know,
I love you."
//teenagerpost.tumblr.com

👍 this is good · read the comments · 361 points

lovecrazy
posted a quote
August 30, 2012 3:05pm UTC

Go ahead and kiss her,
I hope she bites your lip and you choke on the blood.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 356 points

xSarahLovesYoux
posted a quote
August 30, 2012 4:16pm UTC

I re-do high fives if the first one wasn't good enough.
just me?

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 405 points

Breeze
posted a quote
August 30, 2012 7:35pm UTC

Sydney Removalist Quotes
Sydney's Best Forget the Rest Professional & Reliable Service
breedoesnthaveasite.com
x
.
.
I slayed the advertisement.Everything by Breeze.Don't take any part of this without giving credit.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 531 points

sammy*
posted a quote
August 30, 2012 6:43pm UTC

1, 2, 3, SMILE!
...hold it...
don't move....
okay, perfect.
now keep smiling because you look absolutely gorgeous ♥

👍 this is good · read the comments · 488 points

hay_hay12
posted a quote
August 30, 2012 4:02pm UTC

"I wish that i could bake a cake
made out of rainbows and smiles,
and we'd all eat it, and be happy."
-mean girls

👍 this is good · read the comments · 434 points

Bravosierra*
posted a quote
August 30, 2012 3:29pm UTC

No matter how old I get
When someone says "Guess what,"
I always respond with, "Chicken butt."

👍 this is good · read the comments · 447 points

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