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NinjaBarchu

*Hooligan*
posted a quote
July 25, 2012 12:35pm UTC

Dear Mom,
How can you hear me mumble under my breath but you can't hear me yell, "What!?" when you call my name
sincerely,
Confused Kid

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BlackButterflies
posted a quote
July 25, 2012 3:34am UTC

click to see this quote

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ThatsJustLifee
posted a quote
July 18, 2012 6:02pm UTC

me: Mom, can I go out?
mom: I don't care just don't forget your keys.
me: Aren't you going to ask where I'm going or give me a curfew...?
mom: We both know you'll be at the park or getting food.
me:
mom:
me:
me:I could be hanging out with boys.
mom:
me:
mom: HAHAHAHA
mom: Omg this is so funny!!
mom: Wait until i tell my friends this!
mom: "I might be with boys!" *Robotic Voice* HAHA
mom: Oh god I almost believed you there for a sec..
mom: Phew, I needed a good laugh.
mom: Seriously though where are you going?

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MeeAndYoou
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 5:18pm UTC

Guys: Girls think period cramps are bad? Try getting kicked in the balls.
Me: Okay, I'm sorry, but you're an idiot. Number one, we could never get kicked in the balls because we can't grow them. Numero dos, period cramps are sore as sh*t. Three, even if you got kicked in the balls once a month (which you don't) the pain DOES NOT last for a week. Four, you can't bleed from between your legs for a week and live. Five, Shut the f*ck up and actually use one of your very little amount of brain cells and think before you speak, or you'll get girls on their period wanting to stab you with very pointy objects. K. Thanks. Bye.

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Kaseyy61797
posted a quote
July 18, 2012 11:32pm UTC

I just watched my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes and thought, "Wow, dogs are easily entertained." Then I realized I just watched my dog chase his tail for 10 minutes...

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smluvsart
posted a quote
July 18, 2012 11:27am UTC

Welcome! Welcome all to the Witty Wars!
Come! Come and watch as people battle!
Yes, it is the Directioners vs. the Directionators!
It's the Nutella Lovers vs. the Nutella Haters!
Come and watch as this brutal battle takes place!
And to all those compeating...
MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR!

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TheGirlWhoLived
posted a quote
July 19, 2012 1:19pm UTC

Telling someone with depression to 'just get over it and be happy'
is like telling someone with a broken leg to run to a hospital
Telling someone with an eating disorder to 'just eat'
is like telling someone with claustrophobia to get inside a small cupboard and lock the door.
Telling someone who self-harms to 'just stop doing it'
is like telling a drug addict to sit in a room full of drugs and touch nothing.
How can you judge what you don't understand?
nmq

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littleleftofthemiddle
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 8:24pm UTC

me: ugly people exsist to make pretty people stand out
me: so thats my contribution to society
me:
me:
me:
me: you're welcome.

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danceoff101
posted a quote
July 19, 2012 4:29pm UTC

Yesterday my brother told me, "most people your age aren't allowed to watch Saw because it might scare them. You aren't allowed to watch it because it might give you ideas"
♥
Format by Sandrasaurus

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gloriaLOVE
posted a quote
July 21, 2012 9:12pm UTC

ONE DIRECTION.
NUTELLA.
GAY MARRIAGE.
OLD WITTY.
WITTY WARS.
CHANNING TATUM.
Is this a Top Quote now?

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WonderfulLove
posted a quote
July 17, 2012 12:30pm UTC

click to see this quote

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I_Dont_Know
posted a quote
July 17, 2012 11:44pm UTC

It's proven by studies that people who stay up late and sleep in have, on average, a higher IQ than those who go to bed early and wake up early.

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LandonIsWitty
posted a quote
July 18, 2012 7:21pm UTC

life is a roller coaster
i t ' s y o u r c h o i c e w h e t h e r y o u
Scream and hide your head,
OR THROW YOUR HANDS UP AND
enjoy the ride.

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Crazygirl11
posted a quote
July 17, 2012 9:21pm UTC

This Time Last Year
Everything Was So
{Different}

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LilCShawty
posted a quote
July 18, 2012 9:22pm UTC

Respect old people,they graduated without Google and Wikipedia

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MissyStar1965
posted a quote
July 20, 2012 6:05pm UTC

to do list:
1. Make vanilla ice cream. Put in mayo jar. Eat in public.
2. Hire two private investigators. Get them to follow each other.
3. Wear shirt that says 'Life'. Hand out lemons in a street corner.
4. Get into a crowded elevator and say ' I bet you all are wondering why I have gathered you here today'.
5. Major in philosophy. Ask people WHY they want fries with that.
6. Run into a store. Ask what year it is. When someone answers, yell 'It worked!' and run out cheering.
7. Become a doctor. Change last name to Acula.
8. Change name to Simon. Speak in 3rd person.
9. Buy a parrot. Teach the parrot to say 'Help. A evil wizard and witch turned me into a parrot!' reaptedly.
10. Follow joggers around in your car blasting 'Eye of the Tiger' for encouragement.

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MissSopralto
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 11:46am UTC

blacklace
When all the people in
High School Musical
have never rehearsed, but are all singing the same song and doing the exact same dance. In unison.
nmf
blacklace

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BlackButterflies
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 1:53am UTC

Okay, so my parents usually try to avoid kissing and stuff in front of my little sister (she's four), but today Dad kissed Mom when my sister was in the room. This happened:
*kiss*
Hazel:
Hazel:
Hazel: oh my god
Hazel: YOU GUYS DO THAT
Hazel: I DIDN'T THINK YOU DID THAT
Hazel: NEVER DO THAT EVER
Hazel: NOT EVER OKAY
Hazel: That is not alright! Ew!
Mom: Honey, when a man and a woman love each other very mu-
Hazel: no.
Hazel: the naughty corner.
Mom: What?
Hazel: Sit in the naughty corner for being gross.

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Bravosierra*
posted a quote
July 21, 2012 2:43pm UTC

My friends brother has cancer. He went to the barber shop to shave off his head before chemotherapy. Here's the story.
Sitting at the barber shop with my brother and the man across from him asks why he's shaving his head. He explains he has cancer and without hesitation the man tells the barber to shave his hair off. Without even knowing my brother he did one of the nicest things I've ever seen.
Picture ;
http://photos-b.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash3/s720x720/541621_3177908500335_1518685418_n.jpg

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zubair
posted a quote
July 22, 2012 2:45pm UTC

My neighbor knocked on my door at 3:30am this morning , Can you believe that 3:30 am ?!!luckily for him i was still upplaying my drums... m

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