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LandonIsWitty

Status: I just really want to see monsters university idk

Member Since: 18 Jun 2012 01:41pm

Last Seen: 30 Dec 2013 12:50am

Location: My house. Always.

Gender: M

user id: 309705

286 Quotes
792 Favorites
335 Following
1,862 Followers
13 Comment Points
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This is unimportant. Go read my quotes. Peace out girl scout.
  1. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    December 30, 2013 1:04am UTC
    *Touches ur butt*
    Sorry it was an assident

  2. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    December 30, 2013 1:01am UTC
    Does flipping out and
    jumping to conclusions
    count as exercise

  3. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    December 30, 2013 12:52am UTC
    were you the first person on earth?cause aDAMN

  4. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    July 10, 2013 11:42am UTC
    It doesn't matter how you do it.
    your parents will still find their baby dead.
    your friends will still blame themselves.
    your siblings will still cry every night
    your pain may have ended,
    but for everyone you love?
    It's just the beginning.

  5. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    July 6, 2013 10:17pm UTC
    Wanna hear a couple jokes?
    Internet explorer.
    18+ warnings.
    middle school relationships.
    my social life.
    miley cyrus' new music video.
    people who can't distinguish between 'your' and 'you're'.
    ugly cats.
    what did the giraffe say to human? nothing, giraffes can't talk.

  6. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    July 6, 2013 10:07pm UTC
    A wittian walks into a bar
    Just kidding, wittians don't even leave their rooms.
    ***Alternate ending***
    A wittian walks into a bar
    Wittian: Ow.

  7. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    July 6, 2013 10:03pm UTC
    Me: *Walks into living room*
    Sister: Watcha drinkin?
    Me: The blood of my unfollowers
    Her: What
    Me What

  8. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    July 6, 2013 9:52pm UTC
    How stating your opinion should be:
    Person 1: Hey I don't really like this thing
    Person 2: I respect your opinion, but I actually think it's pretty great
    Person 1: Okay
    Person 2: Yeah
    How stating your opinion really is:
    Person 1: Hey I don't really like this thing
    Person 2: I'm sorry, no offense, but YOUR OPINION IS WRONG AND MINE IS RIGHT *blah blah blah* YOU'RE A STUPID JUDGEMENTA;L C.NT *blah blah* GO KILL YOURSELF A//HOLE *blah blah blah* CURSES ON YOU AND YOUR ANCESTORS AND YOUR GOAT AND YOUR ANCESTOR'S GOAT AND YOUR GOAT'S ANCESTORS *hisssssss*
    Person 1: .....

  9. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 30, 2013 10:23pm UTC
    why fall in love when you can fall in lava and feel the same way?

  10. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 30, 2013 10:13pm UTC
    some people look so adorable when they kiss.
    and then other people are just like FACE SMASH.

  11. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 29, 2013 1:05am UTC
    so my friend named her cat quesadilla and then her and her mother had a conversation that went sort of like this:
    mom: where is nacho?
    friend: his name is quesadilla
    mom: well i like nacho
    friend: WHY wont you call him by his name?
    mom: because...
    mom: because...
    mom: because...
    mom: because he's NACHO KITTY!
    mom: *laughs hysterically*
    mom: OHHHHHH
    friend: *grabs quesadilla and runs*

  12. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 28, 2013 10:03am UTC
    Me: *violently scratches mosquito bite*
    Me: IT FEELS SO GOOD BUT YANNO IT HURTS

  13. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 28, 2013 9:32am UTC
    & i never thought i'd miss seeing:
    "Too many witty people are doing witty things."

  14. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 28, 2013 9:29am UTC
    Me: *says sarcastic things*
    Me: *never leaves room*
    Me: *refuses to talk to people*
    Me: *eats 24/7*
    Me: *wonders why i dont have friends*

  15. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 28, 2013 8:20am UTC
    Toilet at a normal time: whooooosh
    Toilet at some ungodly time in the middle of the night: WHOOSH NIAGARA F//CKING FALLS WHOOSH WHOOSH MOTHAF//CKA

  16. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 28, 2013 8:14am UTC
    Why cry because roses have thorns,
    When you could s m i l e because thorns have roses?
    coded by landoniswitty
    please don't remove
    hiss, grr

  17. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 27, 2013 11:44pm UTC
    I have a quote on the first page of the top quotes. It has 94 favorites.
    This is not exciting... It honestly disgusts me.
    94.
    94.
    94.
    12 months ago, 94 favorites might put you on the top 24 hours.
    UGH.

  18. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 27, 2013 11:33pm UTC
    Here's to the 90's babies, with no baby
    & here's to all of the 90's babies who are amazing moms and dads♥

  19. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 27, 2013 11:10pm UTC
    Thousands of people left witty to get *gasp* social lives (shudder) and I'm here wondering if they feel guilty or miss us at all.
    my format (hiss, grr)

  20. LandonIsWitty LandonIsWitty
    posted a quote
    June 27, 2013 10:55pm UTC
    A SHORT HORROR STORY:
    Unable to access the network
    The connection to wittyprofiles.com was interrupted by a change in the network connection.
    Here are some suggestions:
    Reload this webpage later.
    Check your Internet connection. Restart any router, modem, or other network devices you may be using.
    Error 21 (net::ERR_NETWORK_CHANGED): A network change was detected.
    *shiver, shiver*

:)

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