Getting Better.
Introduction.
Hey. I'm Lily, I'm 13 years old going on 14 on February 19th. Pretty stoked.
Anways, I'm going to start writing a diary/story called, "Getting Better" about my life and my problems with my best friend whom I refuse to give up on. It's complicated, and you may not understand, but bare with me.. I have no one to vent to, so mine as well vent here. Please, if you have some advice, feel free to comment anytime, either here or on my profile, advice is in a lot of need here, but please, keep RUDE comments to yourself. Here I go.
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"I don't think they'd understand."
September 10th, 2011
There. I sent the message. The message to a boy who I want to know, and talk to, and be friends with, but haven't talked to since pre-school. Great start, right? He answered, and we exchanged numbers.
September 11th, 2011
He texted me first thing when he woke up, started telling each other things about ourselves, then he had to leave for a football game.
September 12th, 2011
Monday, ew. school. after latin, 3rd period, asked him to walk with me to lunch. He did. when another boy told him to get away from me, that I was gross, he stayed.
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There you have it, the first 3 days with my now best friend. If only I'd known..
Trevor Pelkey, shy, smart, nice, amazing.
That's my best friend. And I'm going to catch you all up, before I continue. So, we talked for awhile, maybe only two weeks before I asked him out, in person, and he said no, it wasn't terribly bad, and we remained friends afterwards. We talked everyday, everything was innocent and amazing and perfect. November came, and by then, we were the best of friends, but everyone wanted us to date.
Nothing really out of the ordinary happened at all during this period of time, we were normal best friends, with an argument every now and then, he always let me win.
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March 25th, 2012
He told me he was confused about his feelings for me, we talked it over, told him I wanted to stay just friends until we were older so we could possible last to marriage, everything went back to normal.
May 3rd 2012,
I started dating my ex boyfriend, Josh Carriere.
Broke up 3 days before our one month.
After that, everything changed.
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Over this time, I met Trevor's mother, father, and little brother, me & Trevor were at the height of our friendship, picture perfect. Then.. we started seeing what lines we could cross and boundaries we could over step. We started saying things, friends don't really say to eachother, nothing extreme, but "I love you" "you're the best boy I've ever met/ girl I've ever met" & Long sweet messages. But everything was completely fine...still having those little fights.
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Summer 2012
This is when we really started experimenting with things. we would send long sappy heartfelt messages to eachother. We would also say I love you every night before we went to bed.. This is when we starting running into problems, & NO WE WEREN'T DATING.
This is when I stopped trusting him.
Fights every few weeks, didn't go that low, they weren't horrible, but they weren't enjoyable.
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First day of school, September, 2012
8th grade
Saw him for the first time in two months, everything was good, blah blah blah.
Texted him when we got home, started talking, I called him a player... we began the worst fight we would ever come to have. He said i didnt trust him because i was insecure, my fault i cant keep any guy friends, im too much drama, not to talk to him. We hugged and made up the very next day. We loved each otther, but almost every weekend we would fight and I couldn't trust him. I have come to think that it's because I can't call him mine and he could replace me and he could say all this stuff to anyone else..
October 31st, 2012
Found out my friends were being disloyal, turned to Trevor for help, he wasn't there... I was hurt.. I cried.
November 2nd, 2012
Told him he was never there for me, turned into a fight, another big one. He was going to leave me. I begged him to stay and we said we would work it out and everything was good for a few days.
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To be quite honest, December is a blur. Except for December 26th & 27th..
I was so mean.
I told him to go to h e l l
to go eff himself
that i hated him
& other mean things, simply because he wasn't there. "Too Busy"
we talked it out. then the 27th , at night, we fought again, and decided that for the new year, we'd start completely over.
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January 1st, 2013, 12;00 am exact.
I texted him the first message I ever sent him.
we started over.
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3 days. we were good.
then we didnt talk for a week. talked to him that friday he said he thought I left him. I didnt. still didnt talk until monday. he stilll thought i left him. and I didnt.
Now, the rest is definetly a blur...
But, 11 days ago,
Things started,
GETTING BETTER.
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