Toofunny Quotes

PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
April 22, 2016 1:07pm UTC

“
Someone Please tell
me we Kodaked that
moment!
#Parks &Rec
”

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
February 19, 2015 5:23pm UTC

“
Is Sandy
the one
I call,
"Mom"?
No Patrick,
that's your
Mother.
Oh!
#SpongebobHipsterpants
”

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Gpc11
posted a quote
January 9, 2015 12:19am UTC

*Comes home with bag*Me: Hey babe I got you somthing, I want you to wear it later tonight!Her: But...there's nothing in the bag?Me: ;)

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
November 30, 2014 12:52am UTC

“
ALEX!
For the
Love of
God,
Will you
S t o p
and record
some Drums?
Holy $h it!
”

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Gpc11
posted a quote
November 7, 2014 7:08pm UTC

She used Vaseline to give me a hand job and I came three times in the shower trying to wash it off.

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Forever His*
posted a quote
March 7, 2014 7:32pm UTC

'Im Ugly' Ohh So Thats Why You Uploaded 10000000 Pictures Of Yourself
Hah Thats Coold (;

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
February 25, 2014 5:19pm UTC

SoMeONE has
sabotaged the
condamns.
Format:SecretlyBrokenAndSilentlyHoping

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
February 24, 2014 7:13pm UTC

Are you
The Cinerlla
Who'll be
Ballin'?
Format:SecretlyBrokenAndSilentlyHoping

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
February 20, 2014 7:13pm UTC

Trencher Problem #126
When you
can't put
on aviator
sunglasses without
saying,
"Snorkelfin Bogwater"
Format:SecretlyBrokenAndSilentlyHoping

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
February 19, 2014 8:05pm UTC

Trencher Problem #7
Having the
urge to
say,
"Awww man!"
everytime someone
mentions pomegrantes.

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JustNodandSmile
posted a quote
January 22, 2014 4:43pm UTC

Why didn't the chicken cross the road?
Because he didn't want to die.

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data813245*
posted a quote
January 4, 2014 9:37pm UTC

A husband sets up a new password on the computer. He puts as "mypenis". The wife tries to put in the password, the wife is on the floor laughing because there is an error sign stating that the password isn't long enough.

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
December 22, 2013 11:52pm UTC

I'm starting
to really
Understand Jack
Barakat's obsession
With the
Movie,
HOME ALONe

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
December 5, 2013 11:09pm UTC

Alex " Hi!"
Squire "GO SING!"
Alex "Hold on D!(kf*(ker!"
Jack "Hey! Matt is NOT a d!(kf*(ker!"
Alex "He IS a d!(kf*(ker I've seen-"
Squire "You don't know how to curse."
Alex "I don't... I just-"
Squire "Hey D!(kf*(ker!"
Alex "All my mind is capable of is pulling two out of nowhere and stringing
them together."
Alex "Hey Sh!+-"
Jack "Hey (0(k d!(k!"
Alex" Hey you $h!+ b@$+@rd!"
Rian "I'm gonna f*(k $h!+ you!"
Alex "I'mma $h!++ing f*(k on your head!"

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Vinita*
posted a quote
November 24, 2013 12:09pm UTC

What did the meat shredder say to the meat?
Grind on me

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Vinita*
posted a quote
November 23, 2013 2:49pm UTC

One time
I tripped in front of a 2nd grader
and I wanted to say holy cr*p
but i wanted to say holy cow because it was a 2nd grader
so I ended up saying
'Holy crow'

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
November 22, 2013 4:48pm UTC

My Grandma
takes selfies
and poses
with Duckface...
x"D

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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
November 21, 2013 9:19pm UTC

Jack Barakat
@JackAllTimeLow
Follow
Alex just grabbed my butt and whispered "If the kids don't belive, make them believe". I have no idea what he's talking about
********* please do not remove the credit, this format was made by petrichor :-) ALSO DO NOT REMOVE THIS PART EITHER BECAUSE THIS IS THE CREDIT TOO OKAY
← Reply
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PrimarilyParamore*
posted a quote
October 26, 2013 5:28pm UTC

Best Youtube video ever:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jXSYybCVxVM
Format:SecretlyBrokenAndSilentlyHoping

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JustNodandSmile
posted a quote
October 4, 2013 5:35pm UTC

math worsheet pun #1
What do mechanics charge to fix tires?
A flat rate.
get it?
A flat rate!

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points

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