i feel like a loser a lot, like i’ve lost.
i think about all the things i’ve lost
weight, lovers, memory
dignity, time, self respect
and people
most of all i lose people
to prison, to ghosts, to the ground
to a changed phone number
to a nothing that meant everything.
i start to count loss with my fingers
the summer we lost our home
and last year, my pride
my innocence and my milk teeth in the same winter
my father, my brother
my country, my accent.
the television tells us that we
have to ’let go’
and i do.
even my secrets
i lose to poems.