I have to quit this, I can't keep on chasing the
cheap thrills that only last me an hour and then make me feel
down again. I need to be my productive self again. Where did my
determination go to die? I need to be more disciplined, I keep
saying it without action. I don't know why I'm doing this
to myself. It's self sabotage. I need to work harder. I need
to put in more effort. I need to be productive and work
efficiently again. I'm not a happy person when I'm
stressed and anxious. I can't keep up with this depressing
routine of barely scraping through. I miss my old self. I need to
find her. I need to be at my best again.
