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sercrets101

  1. Cammie Cammie
    posted a quote
    September 4, 2013 6:22pm UTC
    waLk into the club like whaddup
    i got oh no oh god im in the wrong building im so sorry i didnt mean to interrupt this funeral god bless


  2. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  3. _Jannette _Jannette
    posted a quote
    August 23, 2013 10:58pm UTC
    Putting on your bra when your skin is wet is like wrestling with satan...

  4. Eli22b Eli22b happy witty anniversary!
    posted a quote
    August 24, 2013 3:48am UTC
    Some fashion tips for this coming school year:
    - Ankle length Uggs are the biggest mistake since crocs.
    - Sparkly Uggs are even worse
    - Do not, and i repeat, DO NOT wear open toed shoes in January. You're crazy
    - Band t-shirts are like jesus for lazy days.
    - Please wear a sports bra if you're only going to wear a sweatshirt, I'm begging you
    - Colored jeans are a no no if you have wide hips, they make them look 10 times larger. Neutral colors are ok, but yellow and blue is a no.
    - Snooki's hair bump is not ok to wear in school. Neither is heavy eye shadow
    - I swear to God if you're wearing a heal over 2 inches I will stab you with it
    - Dont wear a scarf with yoga pants
    - I swear to God if you get 3D nails I will personally hunt you down and kill you

  5. 伤* 伤*
    posted a quote
    August 22, 2013 4:22pm UTC
    It's not a true car ride unless blurred lines comes on
    the radio at least 74 times

  6. smallchick105 smallchick105
    posted a quote
    August 10, 2013 5:17pm UTC
    I know that it sounds weird, and mean, but I wish you'd just break up with your girlfriend. Every day you talk to me about how much your trust is going away with her, and how your not always happy. You act like you like me, but I don't know for sure. I wish you'd see how much I like you so that we could be together, because sooner or later I'll be tired of waiting.

  7. Abby. * Abby. *
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2013 9:23pm UTC
    me: hi i'd like to place an order
    dominos: okay what can i get for you
    me: um hold on, hey babe you wanted a large pepperoni right?
    my emty apartment:
    me: yea we'll get a large pepperoni

  8. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    August 1, 2013 1:26am UTC
    *our house is on fire*
    mom: oh my god, go get the cat!
    sister: someone grab mom and dad's wedding candle!
    dad: i'm going to go get the pictures!
    me: okay, imma need my laptop and charger, my phone, my clothes, some shoes, can one of y'all help me carry all this?

  9. carson5482 carson5482
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2013 8:30pm UTC
    Me: Makes a mistake
    Me: Thinks about mistake every night for the next 7 years.

  10. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2013 8:36pm UTC
    If you feel like a loser, just know that when I was in the Bahamas a bunch
    of guys came up to me and said I was pretty and I just squeaked and ran away.

  11. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2013 8:55pm UTC
    Me: *watches Catfish while talking to people online*

  12. BravoSierra BravoSierra
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2013 8:43pm UTC
    I met Eminem once, but it was awkward.
    His palms were sweaty, knees weak, arms were heavy, vomit on his sweater already, mom's spaghetti.

  13. polinaagoldberg* polinaagoldberg*
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2013 9:00pm UTC
    *bird chirps*
    me: wtf what tab is that coming from

  14. Cammie Cammie
    posted a quote
    July 30, 2013 12:08pm UTC
    What happens at Olive Garden when they're grating the cheese and you don't say "when"?
    The waiter gets more and more concered as the cheese starts piling up and you remain silent. They eventually plead with you to stop this madness and you just when but hold firm. Olive Garden fills with cheese, killing everyone in the building, as the cheese begins to pour out to the street. The world floods with cheese. All is cheese.

  15. Hale_Storm18 Hale_Storm18
    posted a quote
    July 29, 2013 11:48pm UTC
    Reasons I don't like Justin Bieber
    1) He said that r.ape happens for a reason
    2) At Anne Frank's house, he wrote in the guestbook that he hoped "she would have been a Belieber"
    3) When asked to try being vegan, he spit out the vegan steak that was specially ordered for him
    4) He makes his fans pay tons of money to see him live, even though he could afford having the tickets be $50 instead of $100 dollars for mezzanine seats
    5) Once, he went to a childrens hospital in England and made them clear the area so he wouldn't have to wait near the sick children. He spent about 5 minutes with the children while the cameras were around and then left as soon as they wre gone.
    6) He peed in a restaurant kitchen
    7) Once, he faked a really bad asthma attack and the paramedics were called. He then proceeded to laugh is a.ss off when they came through the door. His people talked the paramedics into not saying anything because, apparently, you can go to jail for that.
    8) He wanted to go to a mall, once, and when the car came he sent it back because he didn't like the color. He then spent only 5 minutes at the mall before leaving and saying it was the sh ittiest mall he'd ever been to.
    9) He didn't show up to one of his concerts until half way through the scheduled time
    10) He's quoted to having screamed, "F.uck Bill Clinton" to cameras
    11) He attacked a paparazzi, who is suing.
    12) When he went to Vermont, he was kicked out of every business he went to (IHOP, Hannaford, Walmart, etc.)
    13) At a movie theater, he threw a huge temper tantrum when he was told that he couldn't bring his Subway sandwich into the movie, since it was against the rules. He made a mess in the theater and was carried out by one of his bodyguard, kicking and screaming.
    14) Once, he randomly showed up to Disney unannounced and demanded that the entire Yachtsman Steakhouse be cleared- reservations cancelled and all- so that he could eat there. The staff had to call every single one of the guests to tell them that their reservations they had been planning for months were cancelled and wasn’t allowed to give them an explanation. Disney also decided that it wasn’t fair to their guests and gave them free dinner at another restaurant, which obviously lost them a lot of money and business for that night.
    15) He spit on his fans
    I don't dislike him because of his voice or his music. I dislike him because he is a terrible human being.

  16. imonlyhuman* imonlyhuman*
    posted a quote
    July 29, 2013 10:23pm UTC
    That really anoyying moment
    when your at the mall and your stuck behind a REALLY slow walker and you cant get by.


  17. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  18. AnaCastro196 AnaCastro196
    posted a quote
    July 14, 2013 8:15pm UTC
    At wendy's, I saw a Burker King employee
    I felt like I was witnessing an affair

  19. 伤* 伤*
    posted a quote
    July 15, 2013 12:25pm UTC
    SHE WAS SUPPOSED TO WEAR white
    AND SAY I DO
    but now she's wearing BLACK
    AND SAYING GOODBYE

  20. dolph* dolph*
    posted a quote
    July 13, 2013 6:50pm UTC
    Me: *preheats oven to 420°*
    Me: time to get baked
    Me: *gets inside oven*

:)

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