a_random_witty's Favorites

yourcool
posted a quote
January 24, 2013 6:15pm UTC

*someone cute walks past me*
me: nooo babe, come back. i love you.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 431 points

yourcool
posted a quote
January 24, 2013 6:20pm UTC

i'm seriously considering filling my pockets with
glitter and whenever someone near me says something really stupid or rude, i'll just reach into my pocket with a dead expression and realease the glitter into the sky above their head and watch it shower over them like a baptism of stupid.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1462 points

AAAAAAAAA
posted a quote
January 23, 2013 7:04pm UTC

PLL #3
The characters in the book are described very differently than how they are portrayed on TV. Emily is described as a strawberry blonde, Hanna has auburn hair, and Spencer, Ian, Lucas, Mona, and Melissa have blonde hair.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points

SweetMinnie
posted a quote
January 18, 2013 5:33pm UTC

I love that kid that argues with the teacher, entertaining the whole class <3

👍 this is good · read the comments · 121 points

VanessaSykes
posted a quote
January 18, 2013 3:30pm UTC

Parent: GET UP!!
Me: I am up!!
Me: *falls back to sleep*

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 197 points

EmilyxLovesxU
posted a quote
January 18, 2013 2:28pm UTC

Liam: 19 = Mental age: 30.
Zayn: 20 = Mental age: 16.
Harry: 18 = Mental age: 10.
Niall: 19 = Mental age: 13.
Louis: 21 = Mental age: 5.
Accurate.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 266 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
January 18, 2013 3:45pm UTC

friend: you know there's a life
outside the internet
me: send me the link
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5 | f u n n i e s

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 587 points

MyMindBook
posted a quote
January 18, 2013 10:54pm UTC

I knew you were trouble when you
TWERRRRKED IN.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 16 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
January 18, 2013 10:33pm UTC

Dentist: *scrapes gums with sharp, metal instruments*
Dentist: You're bleeding because you don't floss

👍 this is good · read the comments · 598 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
January 18, 2013 10:31pm UTC

People who say, "Is it because I'm black?"
10%: Black people
90%: White people

👍 this is good · read the comments · 762 points

Connork11
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 4:21pm UTC

"It's not that cold out!" Said the P.E teacher with a coat on
"It's just drizzling!" Said the P.E teach with an umbrella
"Running for 20 minutes isn't that bad!" Said the P.E teacher sitting in a chair
"You've got to stay healthy!" Said the P.E teacher that is over-weight
"Being on your period is no excuse!" Said the P.E teacher with no unterus.
NMQ

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1471 points

randi*
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 7:52pm UTC

perfect has 7 letters and so does meeeeee

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 107 points

Jahyvie
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 8:08pm UTC

SHEERAN FACT #11
Ed's favorite TV show is 'Fresh Prince of Bel-air'
Credit: Jahyvie

👍 this is good · read the comments · 111 points

Loveforever713
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 7:10pm UTC

Woah...You need to tell a therapist, not Facebook.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 110 points

Cammie
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 6:51pm UTC

Did you listen to awesome music
Drink some awesome shoters
And soak up eachother's awesomeness?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 129 points

doublesidedice
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 9:59pm UTC

Normal people: hi there gorgeous ;)
Me: if a bear with chainsaws for arms ever attacked you, I hope it would leave your face alone because I think you're kinda cute.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 219 points

strawberry_skittles
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 9:15pm UTC

Fine. Whatever. I'll just date myself.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 314 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 5:31pm UTC

sometimes, you have to
give up on people. not because
you don't care anymore, but because
they don't
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5 | l o v e

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 154 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 5:58pm UTC

me writing
an essay:
i have absolutely no clue
what i am writing but it sounds smart
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5 | f u n n i e s

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 449 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 6:29pm UTC

friend:
if you're procrastinating and
you know it clap your hands
me:
ill clap later
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5 | f u n n i e s

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 389 points

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