Witty Profiles

Jordan.*

1. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   June 5, 2014 3:16am UTC
   Hey guys.
   Here's a poem.
   My name is Jordan
   and I'm somewhat flamboyant
   But I'm just a boy, and
   I'm leaving soon.
   Maybe this poem could be a song
   or maybe it could be an animate object
   that wears a thong
   all day long.
   I should stop thinking about thongs
   and irrelevant things
   these stanzas suck
   and so does Bing, to be honest.
   Okay luckily poems don't have to rhyme
   or have the correct punctuation
   but rhyming is less timing
   and influences more of a patient
   pay in.. dimes?
   .
   Sh/t, poem's over. Enjoy that, because.. well, why not?
   Point is, yeah, leaving, but you guys are super great and kind and wonderful and it's unfortunate I've lost my purpose on here.
   I like talking to you people, and I hope to continue with that talking over some sorta' social media where I don't have a single care about what you ate for breakfast in the morning, but you tell me and the rest of the world anyway. I had fruit this morning. It was delicious.
   I might be back, though. A lot's on Jordy's plate, lately. I got another summer job and what not, and I'm taking college-level classes as well this time, while putting up with some b/tch who can't help but love me.
   (I'm totally joking, I respect that b/tch.)
   You, dear reader, don't have a single care about that, either. But that was for the curious ones.
   As they say; curiosity kills the cat.
   Luckily you all are people and not.. cats.
   By the way, cats are still number one of my list of To Own Most Of.
   Sort of like empty bottles of Gatorade.
   Owning Most of those. Definitely.
   If you see a cat, ever, enjoy that blessing you have of being in the presence of one.
   And maybe think of me, yeah?
   Unless you're allergic, then don't do any of the following and get the hell out of the room you're in.
   I mean, you can still think about me.
   Presence all around, hoo hoo. Jordesus is da name.
   I did just replace 'the' with 'da'.
   You're welcome.
   Anywh/reway, social media and what not. Right, right. I just made an Instagram. Actually I haven't yet but before I type the next word, I will make one.
   Okay, made one.
   And it's @- wait, I forgot.
   It's @- it takes a minute to stop being a hoe and load.
   Seriously. Okay.
   I don't know how I forgot it. It's @Jordesus (Place white girl 'duh' here)
   I'll follow you back instantaneously. Or close to instantaneously. Not sure if I'll even like Instagram, in all honesty.
   White girl selfies, all day long, hay hay.
   I thrive on making fun of Ellie. (That one b/tch I was talking about earlier.)
   Pretty tired tonight.
   Oh and there's Kik, too. Kik is fun. I'm @Da_Oj_Juise_
   Once again, lots of great quotes... Steve, you're a cool dude.
   I enjoyed reading what everyone had to say and aye, you guys are somethin' interesting.
   I apologize if this is hard to read. Or if I seem like a d/uchebag. Chances are, this is hard to read and I'm too lazy to edit, and because of that laziness and constant use on the b/tch card for my girlfriend, I am a d/uchebag.
   But yeah, I wana' talk to you guys, so please feel free to Kik or Instagram my face.
   ^
   |
   Sorry if none of that makes sense. It's late. (It's actually only 2 am but I need an excuse for my malfunctioning brain.)
   Happy summer.
   You're great.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 17 points
2. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   April 30, 2014 4:35pm UTC
   Age is
   not important
   unless you're
   a cheese.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 23 points
3. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   April 28, 2014 3:47pm UTC
   The sign of intelligence is
   that you are constantly
   wondering. Idiots are always
   dead sure about every damn
   thing they are doing in their life.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 68 points
4. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   April 22, 2014 5:48pm UTC
   An arrow can only be shot by pulling
   it backward. When life is dragging
   you back with difficulties, it means it's
   going to launch you into something
   great. So just focus, and keep aiming.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 47 points
5. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   April 21, 2014 5:24pm UTC
   The biggest
   challenge of life
   is to be yourself in
   a world that is
   trying to make you
   like everyone else.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 37 points
6. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   April 12, 2014 1:35pm UTC
   Alexithymia:
   difficulty
   describing
   feelings to
   other people.
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 54 points
7. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   April 11, 2014 7:25pm UTC
   When the root is
   deep,
   there is no reason to
   fear the wind.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 13 points
8. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   April 9, 2014 3:55pm UTC
   I'm not
   interested
   in competing
   with anyone.
   I hope we all
   make it.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 17 points
9. Jordan.*
   posted a quote
   April 8, 2014 8:42pm UTC
   I can run..
   I'm slower
   than a herd
   of turtles
   stampeding
   through
   peanut butter,
   but I can run.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 56 points
10. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    April 8, 2014 3:50pm UTC
    Negative people are only
    happy when they are
    bringing you down to their level.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 34 points
11. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    April 7, 2014 7:59pm UTC
    Dear mum,
    I love how we
    don't have to
    say out loud
    that I'm your
    favorite child.
    Happy Mother's Day.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 49 points
12. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    April 7, 2014 4:14pm UTC
    The difference between
    school and life;
    In school, you're taught
    a lesson then given
    a test. In life, you're
    given a test that
    teaches you a lesson.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 58 points
13. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    March 20, 2014 7:17pm UTC
    Every time
    you are able
    to find some
    humor in a
    difficult sitaution,
    you win.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 72 points
14. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    March 18, 2014 3:30pm UTC
    The only thing standing
    between you and your
    goal is the bullsh/t story
    you keep telling yourself
    as to why you
    can't achieve it.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 71 points
15. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    March 17, 2014 3:28pm UTC
    Yawning is your body's
    way of saying 20% of
    battery remaining.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 89 points
16. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    March 6, 2014 3:18pm UTC
    Simple
    things become
    complicated
    when you
    expect too
    much.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 66 points
17. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    March 5, 2014 6:42pm UTC
    What screws us
    up most in life
    is the picture
    in our head of
    how it is
    supposed to be.
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 65 points
18. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    March 5, 2014 4:02pm UTC
    I don't
    hold grudges.
    I remember
    facts.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 114 points
19. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    March 3, 2014 8:23pm UTC
    "If you are living out of a sense
    of obligation you are a slave."
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 42 points
20. Jordan.*
    posted a quote
    March 3, 2014 3:09pm UTC
    Be careful who
    you open up to.
    Only a few people
    actually care.
    The rest are just
    curious.
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 131 points

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