a week of crying
day one
the day you left you took sanity. no motive, just tears and screams and fists against walls and fists in mij mouth and fists unable to calm down or keep me safe. They where right when they say that sometimes we clench our fists, not to fight but because we can't let go.
day two
there is no feeling. When I was happy, I was happy for you, and when I was sad, it was because you didn't call. ... and now you wont call anymore. Is there any comfort in silent phones and closed doors? The air is colder now, less clean. Nobody to warm me up in the winterdays. Dust gathers and I mistake it for a friend.
day three
I used to be pretty, but now I can't taste your chocolate lips I still long for that taste. I rip my skin in hopes to forget. And when the mirror copies my face, I can't seem to find the girl you once loved anymore.
day four
I go out and find a lover or a beer. I almost forget that with you, kissing doesn't feel like pushing a wall and touching doesn't feel like betrail and going home doesn't feel like fleeing in a dark cave.
day five
the bed is half empty, there's only one half of me left. I try to fill it with memories of you. I told you that I needed you, and you replied that I'm doing just fine. What I don't tell you is that I survive on the dreams that we're still together. I take them in like oxigen and feel dislocated when I wake up all alone.
day six
it hits me that I won't have that honeymoon, or those kids, or that house, or that life we talked about when we where watching the stars. The future is once again the big unknown that you had scarred away.
day seven
it's been a week since my heart was shattered, and I'm not trying to pick up the pieces. It's been a week since I saw your eyes break when you said: "I can't do this anymore". And I... I've said too much and not enough. I pushed away and pulled hair and strings. Sometimes grief and refief are synonims so let's start there.
HelloKittyy11
Amenah
hannahhere
CharliesTheName
justkiddiing
noortycool999
pinapplesealover3