Day Ten
1 out of 3 Confessions;
Me and my bestfriend had a fight so bad, like to the point if I never saw her ever again that'd be all effin right with me. She pretty much told my boyfriend I was a terrible girlfriend and said I was cheating on him. This is the fourth [?] time she's done this, and I flipped out the last times, but she promised she'd never do it again. Blah blah, silly me she did. It's hard to just give up on her, after being there for her through any and every thing. Even when she played and lead on my best guy friend, to be honest I'd have taken a bullet for her, and I meant it. I ripped up the pictures in my room, threw out all her clothes and the necklaces she gave me. Just like a break up, huh? Only I was too mad to cry about it, but it hurt enough to. The only thing I kept were all of her secrets, her lies, never said a word about the millions of guys she flirted with. Because I promised. I don't break those. Even if she stabbed me in the back every oppertunity she got. My best guy friend is in love with her, and she leads him on and plays him. She went to our homecoming and slapped him in the face cause he wanted to hold her. He got mad, and ended up kissing some other girl on the balcony. Good for him. Seriously. But he's in love with her, and I hate it. All he does is get hurt cause she likes him but thinks he's annoying, so she'll kiss him, and play him and this is exactly why guys turn into douchebags; cause they tried being sweet and it just didn't work. But anyways, the real reason I wrote this, is to confess something; Des, I don't hate you. I really really really REALLY don't like you. Like if you were on fire I'd drink half the water then pour it on you.... It's honestly it's taking a lot to write this, because I can't even talk to you or hear about you without getting furious. I don't hate you, and I really wish I did, cause it hurts, like worse than getting my tummy pierced, and shots, and when me and Keith broke up and he went straight to Paige. Worse than when I cut bad enough to scar because of my Dad and how my life was crumbling. Worse than my parents getting drunk every.single.weekend. and fighting with me and each other. I don't know what to call you when I try and explain what happens. I don't really know if we can fix this.... or if I even want to cause we've tried before and it's just not working. Honestly if you got hurt I'd care...but I'm mad enough to not show it. I don't know what to tell you. If I could even face you without wanting to kill you.
Sorry to those
who read.
major vent.
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