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thelongestusernameonwittyprofilespossiblyunlesssomeonesislongerisanyoneslongeridontthinksohahathatwouldbeprettyhardbecausethisoneisprettydarnlong

moonbeampie
posted a quote
June 1, 2012 2:10pm UTC

*teacher calls name on roll*
normal people:Here!
me: *has been preparing for this moment for the last ten minutes*
*sends email*
normal people: logs out.
me: immediately goes to sent items and reads it again.
*arrives early to event*
normal people: Sorry I'm a little early!
me: *waits in car until it's deemed socially acceptable to arrive*
*somebody was mean to me*
normal people: argues, then forgets it.
me: spends the next six years winning arguments against them in the shower
*remembers embarassing moment from years ago*
normal people: *laughs*
me: cringes and obsesses over what could have been done differently.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 3445 points

伤*
posted a quote
May 30, 2012 5:00pm UTC

Introducing Tac-O's
Harry: Meat, lettuce, and cheese flavored O's in a tortilla bowl.
Louis: That's disgusting.
Harry: Even the milk taste like tacos!
Liam: That's disgusting-er.
Harry: That's not a word.
format credit to OneDirection/Quote made by Jill (DON'T STEAL)

👍 this is good · read the comments · 896 points

emma21
posted a quote
May 23, 2012 5:05pm UTC

first week of summer:
omg yay this will be the best summer ever no more school lets all get together and go swimming and camping and have parties and sleepovers and have a summer love yaaaaaaay!
the rest of summer:
witty~tumblr~youtube~witty~tumblr

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 18 points

posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points

lovelife17
posted a quote
May 23, 2012 7:54pm UTC

Math Test: A farmer plants seven crops of tomatoes and three crops of carrots. What is the probability that his mothers name is Leslie?
History Test: The American Civil War ended in 1865, explain how this had a defining role in the extinction of dinosaurs.
Literature Test: Explain what the author ment by, "the apple was as red as an apple."

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points

lovelife17
posted a quote
May 23, 2012 6:50pm UTC

Lil Wayne: I'm the son of rap.
Eminem: I don't have a son.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 10 points

posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 2 points

sophsunflower12
posted a quote
May 10, 2012 9:02pm UTC

you're allowed to have an opinion,
but if it involves Niall Horan being "ugly",
then you're wrong.
nmf

👍 this is good · read the comments · 868 points

sftblgurl56
posted a quote
May 10, 2012 9:39pm UTC

Dyan and Cole Sprouse are 20
Feel old yet?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1497 points

mireunlove15
posted a quote
May 9, 2012 6:20pm UTC

So apparently two girls wanted a photo with Liam today, but told Niall to go away, but Liam kept hold of Niall while taking the photo
Liam is a freaking sweetheart
&
Someone needs to hit those girls with metal spoons
(sorry for the 1D quote)

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1515 points

mayday
posted a quote
April 29, 2012 6:19pm UTC

♥ + + + I WANT TO BE ONE OF
those girls you could just look
♥ + + + AT & TELL THAT SHE'S
something spectacular.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 826 points

BESTFRIENDJK
posted a quote
April 29, 2012 6:50pm UTC

Things Im Good At,
*being awkward
*eating
*being annoying
*sleeping
*being weird
*listening to music
*being lame
*not doing my homework
*being unattractive
*having no friends
♥

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1126 points

mick
posted a quote
April 21, 2012 10:35am UTC

Will you go out with me?
A: Yes
B: A
C: B

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1228 points

standstill_lookpretty
posted a quote
April 24, 2012 1:49pm UTC

click to see this quote

👍 this is good · read the comments · 987 points

Damaged
posted a quote
April 23, 2012 9:17pm UTC

"Were you crying earlier?"
No, I was just impersonating a fountain.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 753 points

AnnieeB
posted a quote
April 23, 2012 8:05pm UTC

The "B" stands for Beatrice.
But I just like "B."
♥

👍 this is good · read the comments · 831 points

iluvblondie23
posted a quote
April 21, 2012 8:34pm UTC

And here's to the girls who never had their first kiss yet.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 686 points

xPoptartStealerx
posted a quote
April 21, 2012 11:21pm UTC

click to see this quote

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1515 points

kelsey0619
posted a quote
April 20, 2012 9:38pm UTC

One Direction
Question: What is your favorite chat-up line?
Zayn: Vas Happenin?
All: Hahaha(:
Harry: Niall?
Niall: Dont have one.
Liam: Thats a great chat-up line. I haven't got one either.
Harry: It's on you, Louis.
Louis: Will you mary me.
Harry: Simple, but effective,
i love them<3

👍 this is good · read the comments · 367 points

伤*
posted a quote
April 19, 2012 2:43pm UTC

Liam: we didn't pass geography
Niall: i did
Liam: Niall, shut up you probably
ate your textbook
-OneDirection

👍 this is good · read the comments · 2026 points

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