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ExtraordinaryGirl

Noey
posted a quote
February 20, 2013 12:06pm UTC

Dear Best Friend,
I promise to be your lesbian lover
When an ugly guy hits on you.

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Noey
posted a quote
March 23, 2013 7:31pm UTC

Will I ever compare to her?

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Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
March 22, 2013 8:19pm UTC

I love how on Witty we all have lots of sass
but in real life, we can't even say hi without messing up.

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capsized*
posted a quote
March 23, 2013 11:58am UTC

What a wonderful winter we're having this spring.

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bentleysmommy
posted a quote
March 9, 2013 8:01pm UTC

Go ahead and mention my child,
The one that died you know.
Don't worry about hurting me further.
The depth of my pain doesn't show.
Don't worry about making me cry
I'm already crying inside.
Help me to heal by releasing
The tears that I try to hide.
I'm hurt when you just keep silent,
Pretending he didn't exist.
I'd rather you mention my child,
Knowing that he has been missed.
You ask me how I am doing.
I say "pretty good" or "fine".
But healing is something ongoing
I feel it will take a lifetime.
Mommy misses you so much Aydenn. Words cant even explain..
</3

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hayhayy915
posted a quote
March 13, 2013 8:56pm UTC

I love Nicki Minaj
but she is totally ruining
American Idol for me this year

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jimmy365
posted a quote
January 29, 2013 7:12pm UTC

friends
are a lot like snowmen.
they dissapear when you pee on them.
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5

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jimmy365
posted a quote
February 8, 2013 12:01pm UTC

Status: Rain! :)
Older person on Facebook: Us too, so
badly needed as well. Tell your mom I said
hi. How is the family? Tell everyone hi
from us. We miss you all so much.
Wish we could be there. You're a
beautiful young woman.
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5

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atxQTxoxo
posted a quote
November 30, 2008 6:23pm UTC

It'$ long but pleez take time too Read...=]
There was a blind girl who hated herself just because she was blind. She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend. He was always there for her. She said that if she could only see the world, she would marry her boyfriend.
One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and then she could see everything, including her boyfriend.
Her boyfriend asked her, "now that you can see the world, will you marry me?" The girl was shocked when she saw that her boyfriend was blind too, and refused to marry him.
Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote a letter to her saying..... "Just take care of my eyes dear." I'll always love you forever..
NOt veryy pretty sorry

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atxQTxoxo
posted a quote
February 7, 2009 10:19pm UTC

What I Want in a Man, Original List (age 22)
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 32)
1. Nice looking (prefer hair on his head)
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 42)
1. Not too ugly (bald head OK)
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady - splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 52)
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers your name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 62)
1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears some clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend
What I Want in a Man, Revised List (age 72)
1. Breathing
2. Doesn't miss the toilet

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atxQTxoxo
posted a quote
December 1, 2008 1:17am UTC

Why did the chicken cross the road?
John Kerry's Answer:
I agree that the chicken should cross the road, but I believe that the chicken should not get to the other side..
Moses's Answer:
And God came down from the Heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
Neil Armstrong's Answer:
To go where no chicken has gone before.
George Bush's Answer:
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here
Al Gore's Answer:
I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.
Martha Stewart's Answer:
No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.
Dr. Seuss' Answer:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, I've not been told!
Martin Luther King Jr's Answer:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
Grandpa's Answer:
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us
Jerry Seinfield's Answer:
Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place anyway?"
John Lennon's Answer:
Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
Bill Clinton's Answer:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?
Albert Einstein's Answer:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
Joseph Stalin's Answer:
I don't care. Catch it. I need its eggs to make my omelette.
Emily Dickenson's Answer:
Because it could not stop for death.
O.J. Simpson's Answer:
It didn't. I was playing golf with it at the time.
love it or hate just dont forget it to rate it =) thank yoohh

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ParticipationAward*
posted a quote
March 9, 2013 2:40pm UTC

Overweight < Healthy
Skinny < Healthy

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SparkleSparkleDinoRawr
posted a quote
March 8, 2013 2:50pm UTC

Mom: Go tell your brother/sister it's time to eat.
You: *Walks two inches and yells up the stairs* MOM SAYS IT'S TIME TO EAT!!!
Mom: -__-

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Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
February 27, 2013 6:03pm UTC

Argument I heard on the bus:
Guy 1: No, man, gay bros can raise babies. Look at warthog motherf//cker and that ferret thing that raised Simba. And Simba became king of motherf//cking Africa.

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Bubbles123456
posted a quote
March 8, 2013 9:35pm UTC

By the way, I'm wearing the smile you gave me.

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EmilyxLovesxU
posted a quote
March 9, 2013 3:30am UTC

Taylor Swift: So he called me and he's like *insert sh/tty British accent* "I still love you" and I'm like, I'm sorry, I'm busy opening up for the grammys.
*Then Harry calls her back and he's like*
Harry : I'm sorry, I was preforming at the Olympics
Harry: I'm sorry, I was rehearsing for my sold out tour.
Harry: I'm sorry, I was receiving the Global Success award at The Brits
Harry: I'm sorry, I was doing charity work in Ghana.

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woahman
posted a quote
March 9, 2013 5:20am UTC

Twenty years ago, we had Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash and Bob Hope. Now we have no jobs, no cash and no hope. Please don't let Kevin Bacon die.

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