skrewing*'s Quotes

skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 5:26pm UTC

mommy! i got 5$!
Mom-Well how did you get that?
Daughter: Tommy said if i show him how i do my cartwheels while he sits up in his tree house he will give me 5$!
Mom-honey thats only because he can look at your underwear! Dont take anymore money from him!
*Next Day!*
Daughter- Mommy,
mommy, i got 10$ from tommy
*mom looks disapionted*
Daughter:But mommy, its okay! i tricked tommy :) i did not wear my underwear this time :)
I saw this, and about died. o__o

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 5:22pm UTC

Time Magazine:Did you know when you see someone in your dreams, its because that person wants to see you?
Omfg...
ONE DIRECTION WANTS TO SEE ME.<3

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 5:14pm UTC

HOW TO MAKE YOUR PARENTS THINK YOU'RE INSANE
Follow them around the house everywhere
Moo when they say your name
Run into walls
Say that wearing clothes is against your religion
Jump off the roof, trying to fly
Hold their hand and whisper to them, I see dead people
At everything they say yell, Liar
Stand over them at four in the morning with a huge grin on your face and say, good morning sunshine
Wear a sticker that says, "I am rarted"
Try to swim in the floor

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 5:08pm UTC

Guy1: Did you know that "sugar" is the only word in the English language that the "su" makes a "sh" sound?
Guy2: Really?
Guy1: Yeah, for sure.

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 5:06pm UTC

I love it when i turn you on.
Right away you start touching every inch of my body.
It feels so good, you make me all hot and wet...
I love the shower.
What were you thinking?

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 5:04pm UTC

Today,
My little brother stomped into my room and through a bra at my face
He then yelled
"THIS THING DOESN'T WORK!"
I wonder what he used it for, and why it didn't work...

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 5:02pm UTC

Baby mosquito comes back after first time of flying:
Mom Mosquito: How do it feel?
Baby Mosquito: It was.. wonderful! Everyone was clapping for me!

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 4:49pm UTC

Boy:you cant fool me
girl:okay, spell toast
boy:t-o-a-s-t
girl:say it 5 times
boy:toast,toast,toast,toast,toast
girl:say it another 3 times
boy:toast,toast,toast
girl:okay... what do you put in a toaster?
boy:toast
girl:really? i put in bread :D

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 27, 2012 1:01pm UTC

So, I walked into Mcdonalds to get a soda, and i see this Fat girl making fun of a mentaly disabled kid.
Me: You know that can happen to anyone, You don't belong to be making fun of someone like that, whats wrong with you?!
Her: Well, god gave me a mouth to speak, so I'll use it!
Me: God also gave you a mouth to eat, but you abused that privliage.
Her: *Speachless*
Me: Oh, and you might want to wipe the kechup off your chin.
Her: *Goes to wipe kechup*
Me: No, your other chin.
My format, nmq

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 26, 2012 1:32am UTC

Hey Guys,
Did you hear about...
The x-Box 270?
Format by: BubblesLuvsYou

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 25, 2012 10:46pm UTC

Louis Tomlinson Eleanor is dating Kevin the pigion now......</3
5 minutes ago · Comment · Like
Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, and 2 others like this
Harry Styles
I'm sorry for your loss, bro, but we can always get move, and get married.
3 minutes ago · Like
...........................................................................................................dot dot dot... o_o
Me
Hey, guys, did you hear about the x-Box 720?
1 minute ago · Like

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 25, 2012 3:39pm UTC

click to see this quote

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 25, 2012 3:22pm UTC

☒ single
☒ taken
☒ Married
☒ Engaged
☑ In a relationship, but the other person isn't aware of the relationship.

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 25, 2012 12:56am UTC

I'm A Pasifist
I'll pass a fist across your face.
Format by: BubblesLuvsYou

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skrewing*
posted a quote
August 24, 2012 2:19pm UTC

Y.O.L.O Is Not A Excuse
It's a motivation.
Get it right. ._.