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andshedances

  1. Peace1231 Peace1231
    posted a quote
    September 2, 2012 8:14pm UTC
    I find it hilarious when
    I go on facebook and see
    A girl who just posted a new profile picture & in it she's smiling really innocently pretending that she has no idea that her boobs are literally inches from exploding out of her shirt.

  2. Breath_Of_Fresh_Air Breath_Of_Fresh_Air
    posted a quote
    August 9, 2012 9:06pm UTC
    When Im stuck In a class full of people I hate:
    Screw You ↑ You ↖ You ↗ You ↙ You → You ↓ You ↩ You ↪ You ↬ You ↫ You ↪ You ↩ You ↲ You ↯ You ↴ You ↵ And You ↺
    nmf/nmq

  3. xXxGymnasticsXxX xXxGymnasticsXxX
    posted a quote
    August 10, 2012 10:43am UTC
    So last night, I was babysitting this little girl.
    In the middle of the night, she woke me up-
    And said she had a nightmare.
    S o I a s k e d h e r w h a t i t w a s a b o u t , e x p e c t i n g s o m e t h i n g l i k e m o n s t e r s .
    Instead, she talked about how her grandma was over and was making cookies.
    T h e n h e r b r o t h e r a n d g r a n d m a r a n a w a y w i t h t h e c o o k i e s
    And she was sad cause she wanted a cookie.
    It was adorable.

  4. xodiana15 xodiana15
    posted a quote
    August 9, 2012 8:05pm UTC
    today
    in my culinary arts class, we were asked to pick a food
    that is most like us. Once we turned them in,
    our teacher read them aloud and one said:
    “I’m most like a milkshake, because I bring all the boys to the yard."
    nmq/nmf

  5. JustWaiting JustWaiting
    posted a quote
    August 9, 2012 9:06pm UTC
    That depressing moment when
    You're shopping for school supplies and realize you don't need crayons anymore.

  6. lozza821 lozza821
    posted a quote
    August 9, 2012 7:05pm UTC
    I was standing in the park wondering why frisbees got bigger as they get closer.
    Then it hit me.

  7. wittylilly wittylilly
    posted a quote
    August 10, 2012 6:13pm UTC
    CHICKENS: I just want to be able to cross the road without my motives being questioned.
    NORMAL TEEN: I just want to be able to drink and party and stay out all night without my motives being questioned.
    ME: I just want to be able to sit on the computer all day without my motives being questioned.

  8. subtlysam subtlysam
    posted a quote
    August 10, 2012 5:24pm UTC
    that awkward moment when...
    you are laughing so hard, & no noise comes out,
    so you sit there clapping like a retarded seal.

  9. Smiley_101 Smiley_101
    posted a quote
    August 10, 2012 5:05pm UTC
    Who Else Mentally Says
    WED-NES-DAY
    When Spelling
    Wednesday?

  10. LaureeeenN LaureeeenN
    posted a quote
    August 4, 2012 11:25am UTC
    HOW MY MOTHER WORKS
    me: mom i got all a's
    mom:
    me: mom i cleaned the house
    mom:
    me: mom i don't do drugs and i'm not pregnant
    mom:
    mom: is this your cup on the table?
    me: yes
    mom: YOU NEVER DO ANYTHING RIGHT! YOU JUST AROUND THE HOUSE ALL DAY DOING NOTHING.
    nmf/nmq
    tumblr

  11. BlackButterflies BlackButterflies
    posted a quote
    August 4, 2012 3:41am UTC
    How I would commentate the Olympics:
    me: wow you are too flexible to be human
    me: aaaaand there's a guy with a really nice butt in lane three
    me: oh she has nice abs how can i get nice abs??
    me: someone got a gold medal but idk who because i was distracted by the guy with the nice butt
    me: does anyone know the nice-butt guy's phone number?
    me: HERE'S MY NUMBER, SO CALL ME MAYBE
    me: omg his biceps are the size of my thighs
    me: i want to feel his biceps
    me: would i get fired for feeling his biceps or
    me: michael phelps you are beautiful and i want your babies
    me: RAISE YOUR HAND IF YOU HAVE EVER BEEN PERSONALLY VICTIMISED BY THAT OTHER GUY'S NICE BUTT

  12. mooselinaturtle mooselinaturtle
    posted a quote
    August 6, 2012 11:14am UTC
    three year old me: oh my god dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets.
    me: oh my god dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets.

  13. I_Dont_Know I_Dont_Know
    posted a quote
    August 6, 2012 2:05pm UTC
    Me in 7th grade: Unattractive, socially awkward loser.
    Me now: Unattractive, socially awkward loser with good taste in music.
    Woohoo for tumblr

  14. RonnieMiller RonnieMiller
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2012 11:26am UTC
    Facebook:
    A social network for everyone
    Twitter:
    A social network for teenagers
    Witty Profiles:
    A social network for awkward potatoes.

  15. skyscraper13 skyscraper13
    posted a quote
    August 5, 2012 3:22pm UTC
    You're nice to the weird kid once then BOOM. Stalked for life.
    NotMyFormat

  16. AustinH AustinH
    posted a quote
    August 1, 2012 4:28pm UTC
    Watching the Olympics just reminds
    of how much talent I don't have.

  17. ANICOLE ANICOLE
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2012 8:26pm UTC
    Me: What does a cow sound like?
    Baby Nephew: Moo!
    Me: What does a pig sound like?
    Baby Nephew: Oink!
    Me: What does a duck sound like?
    Baby Newphew: Aflack!
    LMFAO. true story. <3

  18. LilyTree LilyTree
    posted a quote
    July 31, 2012 7:34pm UTC
    Dumb guys go for dumb girls and smart
    guys go for dumb girls, and you know
    what us smart girls get?
    That's right.
    CATS.

  19. TheWrittenInfection TheWrittenInfection
    posted a quote
    August 4, 2012 5:31pm UTC
    Liam: you're insecure
    Me: Hell yeah, I am
    Liam: don't know what for
    Me: well, I'm ugly and awkward...
    Liam: you're turnin heads when you walk through the door
    Me: because people are surprised to see a deformed potato walking
    Liam: don't need makeup to cover up
    Me: you're right. Nothing will help this face
    Liam: being the way that you are is enough
    Me: yeah, enough to get laughed at
    Liam: that's it. I give up on this chick!

  20. Melrose* Melrose*
    posted a quote
    August 1, 2012 5:25pm UTC
    Guy: Whats it like to have boobs?
    Me: what?
    Guy: like do you ever just sit around and grab them?
    Me: uh
    Guy: if i had boobs id watch tv and just jiggle them back and forth
    true story. omg.

:)

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