Best Unbelievable Quotes Ever

Dishonored*
posted a quote
June 28, 2013 6:26pm UTC

Long, but I think it's worth reading because
of the all kinds of awesome:
On facebook, there's this girl my
sister went to school with.
She's generally an annoying b.tch
that doesn't give a f.ck about anyone else.
Well, today she posted pictures of her
totaled car, knocked down poles that
she drove into, and a bunch of street
signs she flattened.
Want to know what the caption said?
"lol this is what happens when you
try to light a cigarette while driving."
un-f.cking-believable right?
Most of the comments were like
100 of her friends being like
"omg! r u ok???!!!???"
but there was this one kid that
actually had b.alls to say
"That's f.cking smart. It's people like you
that put other people's lives in danger because
you're worried about a f.cking cigarette.
I'm glad you hit a pole and signs instead
of a car full of innocent children."
She commented back saying something like
"thanks so much, that totally made my day better :\"
And that same kid, which I now respect so much, replied
"Yeah I'm real worried about making your day better...
just as worried as you were about lighting a cigarette."
I swear I like love that kid now.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 86 points

Pudding007
posted a quote
June 2, 2013 11:14am UTC

My Earth Science Teacher: *has a handful of rocks* this class, is a handful of rocks
*rolls them across his desk*
Teacher: Those were the rolling stones
-_- this actually happened

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 15 points

caiti15
posted a quote
May 24, 2013 8:43pm UTC

Seriously? Cyberbullying? That makes you no better than anyone else, I don't understand why some people think it's "cool." No. It's not you can severly hurt someone by the words you say. Please people use the brains you were given and think about what you're saying before you actually say it. Because people will never forget what someone says to them.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 13 points

*VA VA VOOM*
posted a quote
April 26, 2013 2:59pm UTC

So, in school a Teaching Assistant asked me and my friends to collect the basketballs which boys in my class were playing with. So we did but not many of them were listening. So this is what I did:
Me:*Goes towards the boys*Can you pass your b.all please?
Me:Pass your b.all.
Me: B.all please...
Me:*A moment passes, facepalm, starts laughing* WTF Uhhh!!!
Friends:What is she laughing 'bout?
Me:*Burst out laughing*Ewwwww!!!
Friends:*Thinks, laughing*UHHHH!!!
Me:*Ludicrously laughing*
Me:EWWW!!!!!
Me:*Runs away moaning*
Friend(xXChocolateXx):*Laughing*Why do you want the boys' b.alls?
Me:*laughing*No, I didn't mean it that way, I meant basketball...
And that, wittians, is how my friends thought I wanted to have it with the boys in my class(feels wrong writing that).
*Shivers*
BTW I am way to young for that...
FYI I don't wanna do that!
*Screaming in disgust*

👍 this is good · read the comments · 11 points

CherryPop
posted a quote
June 16, 2013 6:02am UTC

That moment of unbelievable awkwardness
When you have to explain a joke.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 11 points

the-queen-of-feels*
posted a quote
March 23, 2013 9:07pm UTC

so, umm... Yeah.
My Chemical Romance is broken up...
I cried, and I can't believe it.
My little fangirl heart is sad and has stopped beating...
Seeing them perform was on my bucket list.
my life is so sad now.
i need a hug.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 6 points

kelly*
posted a quote
May 8, 2013 4:06am UTC

i just reached 100
followers.
I want to say thank you because you guys are all amazing.
It took me like forever to reach this much followers,
and now I've finally achieved my goal.
I had a really bad day yesterday,
so it means a lot for you guys to make my day today.
I think I've already done this thing two times already in like two months...
But this is the most special one out of all of them, and this is why I
need to make it prettier, and to write a longer message to all of you
amazing followers of mine.
And all of those people who sent me nice comments;
and the haters; (a particular person who was going to delete me)
you are beautiful in your own way, except haters,
I still haven't found your beauty.
And I never will.
This time I'm not going to list all my followers, because I can't be stuffed, and also because you know who you are, and you don't need to see your name on a quote anymore.
You are a pretty and special person and don't let anything change that.
♥

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 6 points

Nikki Sixx*
posted a quote
April 3, 2013 12:19pm UTC

Seriously, what is wrong
with these kids now?
http://www.examiner.com/article/fifth-graders-murder-plot-elementary-school-kids-accused-of-conspiracy-to-kill

👍 this is good · read the comments · 6 points

undead_hobo
posted a quote
May 3, 2013 4:57am UTC

An awkward conversation I had with my sister a few days ago, YES I really did this.
me; *Looks in shirt* OMG WHAT IS THAT D; oh wait.. It's my n(i)pple.
my sister; o.O Dude you need some serious mental help....
me; Dude i thought a fothermucking Leprechaun was in there...
my sister; .....Wow.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points