I think I am always going to be there for him, I
don't know why I even bother but it seems like I can't
help it. Even when I say I don't love him anymore there is
some kind of force gravitating me towards him, despite the
circumstances. Like, he has a girlfriend now and he was in a
relationship before and that doesn't stop me from thinking,
"yeah, maybe you should try to let it go." And I
don't know why, but I'm stubborn and I'm egotistical,
and I genuinely believe he is searching for a feeling that is
somewhat comparable to what he had with me, and he is going to
keep settling and continue to be disappointed that these
relationships aren't working out because those girls can be
perfect 10s, have a perfect body and have a striking converation
from time to time, but they are not me. Plain and simple. With
this knowledge, I will love this man from a distance, and
peacefully check in on him and quietly hope he's doing well
and he's happy, but I know he thinks about me, I know he is
doing the same thing, he just believes that seeng other girls
will help, and it proobably does as a method of distraction. I
don't mind not being the one he is actively trying ot be with
now, because I know he wants to, but we're both not ready. I
feel more confident now than ever that there will be another time
for us someday, but we need to go out there and try different
things.
