I
honestly can't take it
anymore.
There are so many girls who call me
pretty all of the time but I can never believe it.
Because pretty girls go out over the weekends.
Attractive girls get text messages from people besides
their parents and the phone company. Pretty girls get
attention from guys and can get a boyfriend. What do I
get? NONE of that. Every f.cking day I
have to go to school hearing about everyone's stuff
they did with their friends and I can't say sh.t
because my .ss was in my room or on the computer the whole
dam day. I never get invited places or anything, I
literally do nothing all the time. I have friends
but I always have to text people first or else there's
not going to be a conversation; half the time they
don't even reply. The last time I've gotten texted
first was about two months ago and that was someone asking
for homework I swear to God. And you can just forget
guys. I have never had a boyfriend. Not even one of those
silly elementary school relationships.
NOTHING. No guy I have liked has ever liked
me back--hell, I don't even think anyone has or does
like me period. I've never had a first kiss, held
hands, and I can barely get hugs. I try to be so
nice, even to people who bother me to my last nerve. I just
want to help people and be kind whenever I can and some
people are really f.cking unappreciative and are probably
annoyed by my kindness and think I'm only trying to
kiss up. And don't you dare say I don't put in
enough effort because I work my .ss off every day doing so
much sh.t i'd never even think about doing a year ago
to try to be pretty enough for those guys and nobody even
notices. There were countless days when I just wanted
to come to school in sweatpants and I was too tired to put
on makeup but I sucked it up and dressed up anyway. I wake
up early enough to try and do makeup and sh.t, I try so so
so hard to get rid of all my acne, I feel so bad I
bet I f.cking break my parents bank asking for so many
expensive clothes, shoes and electronics but it still
isn't enough. I NEVER WIN. There's always
some girl who they like more who never barely does ANYTHING
with their appearance and to them I am nothing. I used to
never talk to anyone and now that I gained the guts to
socialize more and not be so painfully shy, nearly every
guy I talk to wants nothing to do with me. I always have to
put in all of the effort and if the guy ever does put
in effort it's only because he's really is the type
who wants to be friends with everyone. I lose every
single f.cking time. It doesn't help that I always
feel stupid in school because I'm always doing
something wrong no matter how hard I try to get it right.
Even if I am actually pretty then there must be something
really hella wrong with me that I can't even get a guy
to talk to me. I am exhausted from working so hard just to
still have every guy think I'm some sort of ogre.
I'm tired of crying after school and crying myself to
sleep all the time because what I do is never enough.
I'm worn
out. Please
don't call me pretty because whether it's on the
"inside" or "outside" it is obvious I
am not. Save your time and words for someone who is much
more deserving of them.
0
reply
ThatWeirdGirl* · 1 decade ago
0
reply
I wish I can do more than just fave this quote because it's so true for me. Everything you've described is what I've been feeling basically my whole life. You have no idea how much I relate to this. I just want you to know that you aren't the only one to feel this way and that you're not alone and that I'm here for you if you need to vent or whatever.