randomlove's Quotes

randomlove

randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 6:16pm UTC

A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her little red sports car and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also blonde. The blonde cop asked to see the blonde drivers license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. "What does it look like?" she finally asked
The police woman replied "It's square and it has your picture on it." The driver finially found a square mirror in her purse , looked at it and handed it tothe policewoman. "Here it is " she said.
The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."
*No offense to blondes*

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 6:14pm UTC

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.
The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?
"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."
*No offense to blondes*

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 6:13pm UTC

A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!" The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"
*No offense to blondes.*

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 6:08pm UTC

Friends will ask for a cookie.
Bestfriends will just grab it wihout saying anything.

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 5:22pm UTC

If someone you love hurts you: cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it.

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 5:21pm UTC

We do it. In bed. On the couch. In the car. In the bathroom. Yup...texting.

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 5:18pm UTC

Scientists are complaining that the new dinosaur movie shows dinosaurs with lemurs, who didn't evolve for another million years. They're afraid the movie will give kids a mistaken impression. What about the fact that the dinosaurs are singing and dancing?

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 5:16pm UTC

I wasn't kissing him...I was telling his lips a secret...

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 5:14pm UTC

Conversation between ex's. Bold is what they are thinking.
Girl: "Your new girlfreidn is pretty." I bet she stole your heart.
Boy: "Yeah...she is." But you're still the most beautiful girl i know.
Girl: "I hear she's funny and amazing." Everything i wasn't.
Boy: "She sure is." But she is nothing compared to you.
Girl: "I bet you know everything about her by now." LIke you knew everything about me.
Boy: "Only the stuff that counts." I can't even remember half the stuff she says because i'm too busy thinking of you.
Girl: " Well i hope you guys last." Because we never did.
Boy: "I hope we do too." Whatever happened to me and you?
Girl: "Well i gotta go." Before i start to cry.
Boy: "Yeah...me to." I hope you don't cry.
Girl: "Bye..." I still love you.
Boy: "Later..." I never stopped.

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 4, 2009 5:03pm UTC

One night a guy & girl were driving home from the movies. The boy sense there was something wrong because of the painful silence they shared between them that night The girl then asked the boy to pull over because she wanted to talk. She told him that her feelings had changed & that is was time to move on. A silent tear slid down his cheek as he slowly reached into him pocket & passed her a folded note. At that moment, a drunk driver was speeding down that very same street. he swerved right into the driver's seat, killing the boy. Miraculously, the girl survived. Remembering the note, she pulled it out & read it.→ "Without your love' i would die."

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randomlove
posted a quote
April 1, 2009 9:59pm UTC

Don't you hate it when someone random number texts you and asks: "Who is this?" It's like hello...you texted my first?
*It just happened to me lol*

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randomlove
posted a quote
March 29, 2009 7:13pm UTC

Don't be scared when a big old fat man comes in your room in the middle of the night, and throws you in a bag. I told Santa i wanted you for Christmas.

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randomlove
posted a quote
March 29, 2009 7:09pm UTC

Don't you hate it when you realize you don't have any toliet paper, after you go to the bathroom?

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randomlove
posted a quote
March 29, 2009 7:08pm UTC

Be
a
fruitloop
in
a
world
of
cheerios.

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randomlove
posted a quote
March 29, 2009 7:03pm UTC

Dare
to
be
different.

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randomlove
posted a quote
March 22, 2009 12:27am UTC

My friend: Nothing is impossible.
Me: What about slamming a revolving door.
My friend: It's possible.
Me: No it's not.
My friend: It just comes back and hits you.
Lol love her.

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randomlove
posted a quote
March 22, 2009 12:17am UTC

This could happen to you!
I was barely sitting down, when i heard a voice from the next stall saying, "Hi, How are you?"
Now i'm not the type to get in to a restroom conversation so i don't know what made me answer, but i did somewhat embarrassed: "Doing just fine."
And the other person says:"What are you doing?"
What kind of question is that? At this point i'm thinking this is just to bizarre. but i say: "Uhh...just taking care of business."
Now i'm just trying to get out of these are fast as i can, when i hear another question: "Can i come over?"
Wow! this is getting way to weird for me! To politely end the conversation i say: "No...i'm a litte busy right now!!!"
Then i hear the person nervously say:"Listen, i'll have to call you back. There's some idiot in the next stall who keeps answering all my questions!!!"
Cell Phone, Don't you just love them.
Credit to a text i got.

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randomlove
posted a quote
March 21, 2009 11:54pm UTC

You haven't lived until you have:
1) Been your own Valentine
2) Jumped off a bridge with a bungee cord
3) Got hit in the face with a soccer ball
4) Made out with an apple
5) Made wood levetate
&
6) Had a tampon stuck up your nose cause it was bleeding
Goodtimes

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randomlove
posted a quote
March 16, 2009 5:47pm UTC

So at lunch one day my friends and i were messing around. We were talking about how we raise our hands and my friend raises her hand with jazz hands cause she plays the piano. Then we started raising our hands like the instrument we have played. And since i play the drums we all raised our hands like we play the drums. Right then my crush walked by.

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