heartofgold's Favorites

๑°`°º¤ø тнe_ιмpoѕѕιвle_gιrl_wнo_waιтed ø¤º°`°๑ *
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 4:48pm UTC

*helping my mom cook dinner*
me: *starts to eat everything in the kitchen*
mom: dammit, stop eating everything, you won't be hungry for dinner!
me:
mom:
me: you underestimate my power.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 70 points

gab*
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 7:04pm UTC

i hate it when i'm being taught how to do something and i don't get it so then i feel like patrick when he can't find the lid on the jar after spongebob said "the lid" like 40 times

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 90 points

flyingbacon7
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 5:35pm UTC

I do not have best buds
I just have my ear buds

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 55 points

yourtypicalwhitegirl
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 3:37pm UTC

To be honest I'd rather lose friends
than followers. oops.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 47 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 2:18pm UTC

so i'm just gonna go take a nap for a bit
and i expect to wake up with an aparment, educaction and money in the bank.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 76 points

Repair Boy 🔥*
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 3:32pm UTC

"She's ugly, how does she have a boyfriend?"
Maybe she has an amazing personality and her boyfriend isn't a judge mental a.shole like you.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 92 points

*Elena;~ ♥*
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 4:36pm UTC

I am 8000% done with math
and it's not even mathematically possible to be 8000% done with math.
That's how done with math I am.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 187 points

* Sabaism *

posted a quote
October 21, 2013 6:25pm UTC

Story time #7
So today I was running home
And I fell and cut my thigh, but somehow it didn't rip my pants
So I had blood running down my leg
And some boy walks up to me.
Boy: What's wrong with you?
Me: I got my period. I don't have a tampon. God, this is so embarrassing.
Boy: But... You're... You're a boy.. Right?
Me: Yea...
Boy: But. Boys don't get periods... Do they?
Me: Actually, they do. You'll get it around Freshman year.
Boy: That means I only have another year to go.
Me: Oo. It's gonna hurt, trust me. Better get used to wearing tampons.
Boy: Okay...
Me: Here, let's go to the store. I'll buy you some so you can start to practice.
Boy: Thanks, sir. That's really nice of you.
*At the store*
Cashier: That's nice of you to buy these. Most guys would be ashamed.
Boy: I'm more worried than I am ashamed...
Cashier: Why are you worried, sonny?
Boy: I'll be getting mine next year.
Cashier: But. Aren't you a boy?
Boy: Yes sir. When did you get yours?
Cashier: I didn't get mine...
Me: You're one of those rare ones that don't get it. I am so jealous.
Cashier: Wait... Is that why I couldn't produce children..?
Me: Yes, yes it is.
Then I gave him the money and walked out.
Yep.
I bought tampons for a boy just because of yolo.
I really need a hobby.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 231 points

happiest*
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 2:16pm UTC

can boys like stop having skinner legs than me

👍 this is good · read the comments · 215 points

x_damaged_x
posted a quote
October 19, 2013 5:29pm UTC

She moved on
and I feel bad for you,
because she thought you were
the most amazing boy ever. If
she could have had any guy in the
world, she would have picked
you. Now, you're just another
part of her past, a memory
more faded every day.
& someday, she'll find the
one she deserves, and he will
make her the happiest
g i r l i n t h e w o r l d ♥

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 59 points

fool's gold*
posted a quote
October 19, 2013 8:49pm UTC

It's not true that you can't
love others if you don't love yourself.
Some put all the love they have
into others and are left with none to keep. ♥

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 65 points

BlackButterflies
posted a quote
October 17, 2013 1:45am UTC

this one time a dude at school came up to me and said "hey did it hurt when you fell from heaven" and without missing a beat i replied, "no but i did chip my nailpolish when i crawled my way up from the fiery pits of hell with my army of demons behind me" and he just went really quiet and he hasn't bothered me since

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 163 points

GlassHorizon
posted a quote
August 28, 2013 12:13pm UTC

i want a pet oli sykes where can i get one

👍 this is good · read the comments · 8 points

Fat Amy*
posted a quote
October 6, 2013 7:50pm UTC

Bring me the Horizon

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points

CatchYourPandas
posted a quote
October 13, 2013 12:32pm UTC

I cant
drown my
demons they
know how to
swim~

👍 this is good · read the comments · 11 points

gab*
posted a quote
May 11, 2013 7:27pm UTC

Dear heart,
why him?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 14 points

of_mice_and_lucifer*
posted a quote
October 14, 2013 5:59pm UTC

Hey you.
Yeah you. Stop scrolling for a sec, okay?
You, my lovely friend, are gorgeous. Beautiful. Loved. Smart. Intelligent. Funny. You're a cutie c; . And, I respect you. I appreciate you. I thought of you when I saw this adorable little kitten the other day. So cute. You're so cute! I love you. <3 c:
Okay. Continue scrolling, darling.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 68 points

aellyniq
posted a quote
October 14, 2013 2:45pm UTC

a hard battle.
for everyone you
meet is fighting
be kind;

👍 this is good · read the comments · 140 points

happiest*
posted a quote
October 14, 2013 3:05pm UTC

one thing I will never understand is how normal people are unaffected by movies or books I mean when they watch a movie or finish a book they say “well that was a good movie/book” and they move on while I have an existentional crisis and question the whole universe

👍 this is good · read the comments · 210 points

sweety11
posted a quote
October 14, 2013 7:11am UTC

Piglet:
How do you spell love?
Pooh:
You don't spell it, you feel it.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points

Witty Profiles

heartofgold