Choc_em's Favorites

OMGIMATACO
posted a quote
January 15, 2012 11:44am UTC

I hate it when
Crumbs fall in my cleavage.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1459 points

whenever_you_smile
posted a quote
January 11, 2013 2:50pm UTC

Does anyone NOT have an iPhone?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 661 points

isitonlyme
posted a quote
January 9, 2013 8:59pm UTC

Have you ever sat with your friends and just known that you’re the least important friend in the group and you felt like it wouldn’t make a difference if you were there or not

👍 this is good · read the comments · 657 points

Eli123qwe
posted a quote
January 12, 2013 10:57pm UTC

Witty
www.wittyprofiles.com
Takes Away Your Social Life, Sleep, and Grades!
Join Now!
AdChoices►
.
.
.
Might wanna check that ad above again ;)
double quote format by Breeze

👍 this is good · read the comments · 881 points

yourcool
posted a quote
January 12, 2013 2:58pm UTC

the episode where spongebob goes around
asking people if he's ugly and they all run away is basically an 11 minute description of my life.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 910 points

cathycat15
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 9:08am UTC

Annoying Kid In My Grade: Hey Clare, what way do 5 gay guys walk?
Me: I dont know, why dont we get 4 more of your friends and we'll find out!

👍 this is good · read the comments · 127 points

lovecrazy
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 7:18pm UTC

I was told this hilarious joke today.
It goes:
you're pretty.
Ahahahaha oh man, I'm still laughing.
Someone call me an ambulance, I can't breathe.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 534 points

happiest*
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 12:40pm UTC

Me: hey close the door
Parent: *leaves the door open 2 centimeters*
Me: *dying whale noise*

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 208 points

ErinIsTheName*
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 5:27pm UTC

Dear family,
Just because I'm laughing
when I'm reading a text,
doesnt been I'm flirting with
someone.
Sincerely,
Every teenage girl.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 340 points

ThatsSoMeee
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 3:23pm UTC

That feeling you get
when someone gives up on you.
It’s one of the worst feelings ever.
To know that someone gives up on
even though they said they won’t do it to you
no matter what.
No matter how hard you tried,
or you did everything and gave everything you have,
it wasn’t enough to keep them in your life.
It absolutely breaks your heart knowing
you did everything you could
but it wasn’t enough for them...

👍 this is good · read the comments · 269 points

LiliBlackHeart
posted a quote
January 14, 2013 11:21pm UTC

Can I live In my books please?
I promise I'll be social there.
Liliblackheart

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 189 points

posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 390 points

happiest*
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 10:44am UTC

Let's face it.
Witty Profiles has the weirdest adds on earth.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 323 points

Connork11
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 4:21pm UTC

"It's not that cold out!" Said the P.E teacher with a coat on
"It's just drizzling!" Said the P.E teach with an umbrella
"Running for 20 minutes isn't that bad!" Said the P.E teacher sitting in a chair
"You've got to stay healthy!" Said the P.E teacher that is over-weight
"Being on your period is no excuse!" Said the P.E teacher with no unterus.
NMQ

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1471 points

I_Dont_Know
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 5:57pm UTC

My thoughts are stars
I can't fathom into constellations.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 46 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
January 14, 2013 3:18pm UTC

Skinny is beautiful
and so is curvy
and short
and tall
and long hair
and short hair
and no hair
and freckles
and dark skin
and light skin
and medium skin
and thin arms
and wide arms
and tiny feet
and long feet
and small hands
and long fingers
and big teeth
and wide wrists
and long arms
and blonde hair
and red hair
and black hair
and blue hair
and curves
and hips
and narrow fingers
and chubby fingers
and high cheekbones
and muscles
and strong calves
and big noses
and tiny noses
and round noses
and thick eyebrows
and loud voices
and accents
and intellegence
and high voices
and big toes
and wide thighs
and thigh gaps
and sharp ears
and small ears
and wide tummies
and big hands
and wide hips
and big butts
and flat chests
and no butts
and big eyes
and small eyes
and streaks
and contacts
and glasses
and afros
and straight hair
and curly hair
and moles
and thin legs
and big arms
and big foreheads
and perfection
and flaws

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 194 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
December 31, 2012 8:21pm UTC

band memeber: so how old are you?
me: how old do you need me to be

👍 this is good · read the comments · 595 points

yourcool
posted a quote
December 28, 2012 4:21pm UTC

BOOK HANGOVER; adjective
the inability to start a new book because you're still living in the last book's world.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 561 points

jimmy365
posted a quote
December 29, 2012 9:53pm UTC

me: could i have a large
lady at starbucks: Oh, do you mean a venti?
me: can we not do this

👍 this is good · read the comments · 642 points

sammy*
posted a quote
December 27, 2012 5:09pm UTC

me: i really can't stay
witty: but baby its social outside

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 585 points