Best Fat Quotes This Week

BravoSierra
posted a quote
April 10, 2013 7:19pm UTC

phy-ed teacher: you need exercise.
me: it's pronounced "extra fries"

👍 this is good · read the comments · 492 points

dolph*
posted a quote
May 10, 2013 4:18pm UTC

‘big boobs don’t count if you’re fat’
yeah well BIG D.I.CKS DONT COUNT IF YOU ARE ONE

👍 this is good · read the comments · 352 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
May 22, 2013 1:24pm UTC

mom: did you eat all the donuts?
me: no.
mom: i can see the powdered sugar all over your pants.
me: that's crystal meth.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 259 points

happiest*
posted a quote
August 16, 2013 2:12pm UTC

What do boys even find attractive about b00bs.?They are literally a ball of fat on a girls chest,like if you can love me for the fat on my chest, why can't you love me for the fat on my stomach you piece of sh/t

👍 this is good · read the comments · 249 points

carson5482
posted a quote
February 21, 2013 9:53pm UTC

You can tell that America is obese
when the scariest thing that we have
right now is called Slenderman.
follow for a follow.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 216 points

definition
posted a quote
March 29, 2013 6:41pm UTC

*Eats celery stick*
*Gains 10 pounds*

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 183 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
May 9, 2013 12:40pm UTC

BravoSierra's format
I want to be thin and hot for summer,
but I also want brownies.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 186 points

SalemSoto
posted a quote
August 18, 2013 6:59pm UTC

Not having a thigh gap saved my phone from falling in the toilet.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 185 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
July 2, 2013 4:48pm UTC

Why can't my fat leave me?
Everything else in my life does.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 181 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
March 23, 2013 12:24pm UTC

BravoSierra's format
"Dude, she just called you fat."
"Awh héll no, roll me overthere!"

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 172 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
June 1, 2013 12:41pm UTC

I'd just like to point out that telling someone they're too skinny and must
"Eat a burger and put some meat on those bones." is just as rude as telling someone they're fat and must go on a diet.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 175 points

ChocoTaco
posted a quote
May 18, 2013 1:43pm UTC

Me: I'm still hungry.
Mom: You've had breakfast already.
Me: I want more breakfast!
Mom: You'll get fat.
Me: What's fat?
Mom: It happens when you eat too much food.
Me: Fat sounds awesome! Let's get fat!

👍 this is good · read the comments · 156 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
December 2, 2013 4:30pm UTC

I didnt get to the gym today,
but the cashier's name at McDonald's was Jim so that's pretty much the same thing.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 161 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
May 9, 2013 12:42pm UTC

doctor: are you sexually active?
me: i'm not even physically active.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 151 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
May 7, 2013 12:45pm UTC

BravoSierra's format
I was going to make a quote about fat people in short shorts.
then I realized I'm wearing short shorts.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 149 points

glitter162*
posted a quote
June 13, 2013 3:32pm UTC

Whoever snuck the "s" in "fast
food" was a clever little bas/tard.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 132 points

happiest*
posted a quote
December 26, 2013 2:57pm UTC

I wish I was skinny enough to wear crop tops and skinny enough to wear nice skirts that show off your legs and skinny enough to look pretty in pictures and the clothes that I buy but I’m not and it frustrates me to the point where I want to cut off my fat with worn out safety scissors and sit under my bed and listen to celine dion music until I fall asleep in my own tears

👍 this is good · read the comments · 128 points

Eli22b

posted a quote
June 22, 2013 12:22am UTC

If animals can be adorably fat than why can't I?

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 128 points

Marian*
posted a quote
August 31, 2013 10:37pm UTC

Dear extra fat in my body, you have two options:
make your way to my boobs or gtfo.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 128 points

BravoSierra
posted a quote
May 22, 2013 12:48pm UTC

BravoSierra's format
You may have a hot body,
but I have a hot bucket of fried chicken so I think we know who the real winner is.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 123 points

Witty Profiles

Best Fat Quotes This Week