happiest*

Join Witty Profiles!

happiest*

Status: this site is full of pathetic bitches

Member Since: 30 Nov 2012 08:46am

Last Seen: 2 Dec 2015 11:40am

user id: 340423

1,671 Quotes
13,398 Favorites
615 Following
1,307 Followers
563 Comment Points
Comments
Comments on Quotes
Comments by User
Quote Comments by User
Flair ^beta

follow block report

Layout by 1dfan

“

I was 18 when I wrote that,” she reminds me. “That’s the age you are when you think someone can actually take your boyfriend. Then you grow up and realise no one takes someone from you if they don’t want to leave.
-Taylor talking about Better Than Revenge

happiest*
posted a quote
July 6, 2015 2:24pm UTC

i find it really weird how we can talk to ourselves in our head like how does that even work

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 32 points

happiest*
posted a quote
July 6, 2015 2:20pm UTC

Well excuuUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUu se me

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 43 points

happiest*
posted a quote
July 6, 2015 2:18pm UTC

do u ever feel like every single person you care about cares about someone else more

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 20 points

happiest*
posted a quote
July 6, 2015 2:16pm UTC

reasons i can relate to a raccoon:
~dark circles around eyes
~small & chubby
~lives in the trash and eats garbage
~cute but will fight you
~stays up all night
~washes hands a lot
~communicates solely through weird noises and screams

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 21 points

happiest*
posted a quote
May 15, 2014 2:50pm UTC

i hope you fall in love with someone who makes you question why you ever thought you would be better off alone

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 106 points

happiest*
posted a quote
May 15, 2014 2:49pm UTC

NEW UNDERWEAR IS HONESTLY THE BEST THING EVER AND IT JUST MAKES ME SO HAPPY IDK

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 64 points

happiest*
posted a quote
May 15, 2014 2:46pm UTC

someone: have you seen this movie?
me: no but i've seen gifs

👍 this is good · read the comments · 95 points

happiest*
posted a quote
May 15, 2014 2:43pm UTC

what do u mean “4 minute shower” it takes me 4 minutes to get the water to the right temperature smh

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 90 points

happiest*
posted a quote
May 15, 2014 2:40pm UTC

Some guy just whistled at me while driving by and my dad goes “don’t worry, that was for me”

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 118 points

happiest*
posted a quote
May 15, 2014 2:39pm UTC

if you can have a long and meaningful conversation with me even though we haven’t seen or talked to each other in super super long and not make things awkward you are hella specia

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 40 points

happiest*
posted a quote
May 15, 2014 2:38pm UTC

Sext: I kiss you deeply as I lay you back gently on the bed, my hands roaming up your thighs, palms are sweaty, knees weak arms spaghetti

👍 this is good · read the comments · 55 points

happiest*
posted a quote
May 4, 2014 4:27am UTC

teacher: i’m gonna-
me: mAke iT bENd AnD bREaK, saY A pRAyEr And leT tHE goOD TiMEs roLL [SLOWLY RISE OUT OF SEAT], in cASe God DOesn’t shOW [JUMPS ONTO CHAIR] aND i WaNt thESe WORds tO mAke tHiNGs RIght BUt iT’s tHe WroNGs That mAke thE wORds cOme To LiFe [THROWS DESK ACROSS THE ROOM] “WHO DOES HE THINK HE IS?” If tHaT’s thE WOrst yoU Got bETter pUt YOur FinGErs BAck tO thE kEYs [DROP KICKS TEACHER] oNe niGHt anD oNe MorE tImE [BUSTS DOWN DOOR TO ANOTHER CLASS] tHAnkS fOr thE mEMoriEs evEN tHOugH tHEy WERen’t sO GReat [UPPERCUTS A PLAY DOUGH CAN] “He TaSTes liKE yOu oNLy sWEetEr.”

👍 this is good · read the comments · 52 points

happiest*
posted a quote
April 29, 2014 8:39am UTC

its kinda scary how your whole life depends on how well you do as a teenager

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 159 points

happiest*
posted a quote
April 29, 2014 8:36am UTC

in math today my teacher asked what makes a number perfect and I said its dazzling personality and she almost kicked me out

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 80 points

happiest*
posted a quote
April 29, 2014 8:32am UTC

Reasons To Be Happy:
1.Dead trees still stand and so can you.
2.You have five fingers on each hand. One day those fingers will travel from your lap to someone else’s and that person will know all the bad stuff and still want to kiss you.
3.Seasons are guaranteed when nothing else seems to be.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 52 points

happiest*
posted a quote
April 29, 2014 8:29am UTC

Person:"YOU SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE?!"
Me:"Yeah..."
Person:"SAY SOMETHING IN IT!"
Me:-Forgets entire language-

👍 this is good · read the comments · 56 points

happiest*
posted a quote
April 25, 2014 9:51am UTC

i f--cking hate how nervous people make me like i can’t even walk down the road without feeling judged and that is just ridiculous

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 119 points

happiest*
posted a quote
April 25, 2014 9:48am UTC

My BFF Coming out to her 89 Year old Grandmother
BFF:Grandmother I need to talk to you
Grandma:[concerned voice] What? What is it? Are you sick?
BFF:No, no. Grandma. I'm gay.
Grandma:What?
BFF:I'm gay Grandma. I have a girlfriend now.
Grandma:[relieved voice] Oh honey, is that all? I thought you had cancer. Anytime someone needs to tell me something they are sick. Who's your girlfriend, when is her birthday? I'll bake her a pie.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 182 points

happiest*
posted a quote
April 20, 2014 2:11pm UTC

IM LAUGHING SO HARD WE ARE TAKING OUR MATH EXAM AND SOME GIRL JUST YELLED OUT
“THERE’S NO WAY I GOT 11 MILLION AS MY F-CKING ANSWER”

👍 this is good · read the comments · 102 points

happiest*
posted a quote
April 20, 2014 2:10pm UTC

From the moment I saw you, I knew I was gonna spend the rest of my life avoiding you.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 60 points