Part 11:
I woke up today and I started to just cry. I knew that this wasn't a good start to a hard day. I went into the shower and got dressed. I did my hair and makeup and then I went downstairs. I looked at my BlackBerry and realized that I got a text from John. He said that he knows I wouldn't answer, but he wants to know where the wake was because he wanted to come. I didn't want him to come. I didn't want him to see me weak, and crying. I told him anyways and he said that he would get ready and see me there. I knew that I had to be strong now. Once we got there, I sat in the back because I couldn't go up yet. I said a prayer and then I got up to go up to the casket with my brother. I saw him start to tear, and I just couldn't. I bursted out with tears, my mom and my aunt and cousin comforted me. I sat in the back again cause I knew that I couldn't bare to be up there. I saw John walk in with a suit, he looked so cute. He came up to me and he noticed right away that I have cried. He asked me if I was okay, he put his arm around me and promised that it would be okay and that he was there for me no matter what. He then got up and said hi and sorry to my mom and went around to all my family members. He went up to my brother and gave him a bro hug and apologized. I knew that he was a perfect guy, I was starting to think why I even deserve him. He then came and sat in the back with me, after an hour of just us two talking, I thought it was time for me to go up and say goodbye. I told John that I would be right back. I didn't come back though. I couldn't face John with tears in my eyes, I walked past him and walked outside. I knew that John would be coming right behind me, and about 10 seconds later I heard the front door of the funeral parlor open. He came up to me and put his arms around my waist and told me that I don't need to be so strong for him. That was the most comforting thing of the whole day. I knew that right there, that's where i wanted to be, in his arms. forever.
part 12 coming up soon [: