Best Yey Quotes This Month

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
October 21, 2013 6:25pm UTC

Story time #7
So today I was running home
And I fell and cut my thigh, but somehow it didn't rip my pants
So I had blood running down my leg
And some boy walks up to me.
Boy: What's wrong with you?
Me: I got my period. I don't have a tampon. God, this is so embarrassing.
Boy: But... You're... You're a boy.. Right?
Me: Yea...
Boy: But. Boys don't get periods... Do they?
Me: Actually, they do. You'll get it around Freshman year.
Boy: That means I only have another year to go.
Me: Oo. It's gonna hurt, trust me. Better get used to wearing tampons.
Boy: Okay...
Me: Here, let's go to the store. I'll buy you some so you can start to practice.
Boy: Thanks, sir. That's really nice of you.
*At the store*
Cashier: That's nice of you to buy these. Most guys would be ashamed.
Boy: I'm more worried than I am ashamed...
Cashier: Why are you worried, sonny?
Boy: I'll be getting mine next year.
Cashier: But. Aren't you a boy?
Boy: Yes sir. When did you get yours?
Cashier: I didn't get mine...
Me: You're one of those rare ones that don't get it. I am so jealous.
Cashier: Wait... Is that why I couldn't produce children..?
Me: Yes, yes it is.
Then I gave him the money and walked out.
Yep.
I bought tampons for a boy just because of yolo.
I really need a hobby.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 231 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
December 18, 2013 4:36pm UTC

Hey.
Guess what.
My lips.
Are touching air.
And so are yours.
So through the power of diffusion
They're touching each other.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 113 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
October 23, 2013 9:04pm UTC

Knock Knock
Who's There?
Doctor
Doctor Who?
Exactly

👍 this is good · read the comments · 90 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
September 14, 2013 6:15pm UTC

*Insert funny quote that people will love and favourite that'll make me Witty famous here*

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* Sabaism *
posted a quote
October 17, 2013 6:18pm UTC

About two months ago
My sister did something
I don't remember what
But I swore to get revenge.
Well,
Our relationship is weird
I'm terrifyed of her,
She's terrifyed of me,
Of course, she's forgot about it by now,
Dawn and Josh are out,
And I had about two and a half hours alone,
So I decided this was the time.
I glued her windows shut and painted them black so it was with dark
I also took the lightbulbs out of every lamp
She's been deathly afraid of puppets since Dead Silence (Mary Shaw..)
So I filled her room with evil looking clown dolls and made sure to put one next to her bed
Upon her entering her room, she shut the door
I put a chair under her door knob, so she couldn't leave,
Is it bad that I'm sitting here laughing and typing this while she's screaming her head off?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 155 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
September 23, 2013 10:01pm UTC

DID YOU KNOW:
If you turn around in front of a mirror
With the lights off
At 5 am
Then scream 'Bloody Mary' 100 times
You'll only get to scream it 3 times
Before your mum comes in
And tells you to shut the hell up.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 82 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
February 5, 2014 6:07pm UTC

Hello, friends.
So, Valentines day is coming up
And I would like to take this time to let you know that you are brilliant
You need to know that not having a Valentine does not mean you're ugly.
It doesn't mean you're a terrible person
And it does not mean no one likes you.
The person who likes you could easily be too shy to ask you
And you know what.
You are absolutely perfect, okay?
Each and every one of you
You're beautiful, caring, kind, fantatic and radiant.
Please, never let the lack of a Valentine bring you down
Instead you need to smile and be happy
Knowing that one day, you will have a Valentine
And they will be almost as perfect as you are.
Stay strong, luscious
Your prince charming just needs some time to mature.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 78 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
October 8, 2013 1:22am UTC

GUIS.
TUESDAY, OCTOBER 29TH
IS NATIONAL CAT DAY.
ON THAT DAY
WE SHOULD ALL CHANGE OUR PICTURE TO CATS
JUST TO SHOW STEVE HOW MUCH WE APPRECIATE HIM.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 85 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
October 28, 2013 5:04pm UTC

Confession #55
I just spent two hours
Trying to dig to China
Using only a spoon
Dressed in a toga thingy
Because my friend dared me to.
I'd honestly do almost any dare
No matter how embarrassing

👍 this is good · read the comments · 78 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
November 3, 2013 3:33pm UTC

Confession #59
I taught myself how to do screamo 4 years ago
Story time #10?
I was 13
In 8th grade
And I was known as the 'emo faqqet'
Well, I hated school because of it
So I always skipped.
The principal told me one day that either I sing in the talent show or I'll get expelled.
I decided to show them how 'emo' I was.
Thus, I sang Tears Don't Fall
I was going to just do the singing part
But it sounded terrible without the screaming
So yea.
It took lots of practice and I lost my voice a lot in the begining
But I was so happy when I learned it
Like oml.
Let's just say everyone was too scared of me to come face to face with me and bully me.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 67 points

๑°`°º¤ø тнe_ιмpoѕѕιвle_gιrl_wнo_waιтed ø¤º°`°๑ *
posted a quote
January 13, 2014 8:10pm UTC

things that say a lot about a person
•their favourite character
•the lyrics they write on their hands
•the colours they wear
•which murder weapon they prefer
•how they make their tea

👍 this is good · read the comments · 58 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
February 7, 2014 5:18pm UTC

F is for Friends who do stuff without you
U is for Ur alone
N is for Never going anywhere at all, all you do is sit at home.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 81 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
October 9, 2013 9:39pm UTC

Stressed
Is Desserts backwards
Coincidence?
I think not.

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* Sabaism *
posted a quote
January 19, 2014 8:52pm UTC

Story time #2347826734
Okay so.
When I was 14 I was a complete mess.
And so I tried to roof hop
It was loads of fun
But it was raining
So the roofs were all slippery
In the end I pushed my friend as a joke
He started falling, grabbed my shirt and yelled 'If I go down, you're coming with.'
He landed ontop of me and wasn't hurt,
I broke a few ribs and my back got all messed up
Karma's a bìtch

👍 this is good · read the comments · 62 points

Ethanol
posted a quote
February 3, 2013 12:08pm UTC

“When life gives you free nachos, you don’t question it.”
— Drake Parker

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 53 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
October 22, 2013 9:19pm UTC

Some will win
Some will lose.

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* Sabaism *
posted a quote
January 31, 2014 1:10pm UTC

GUIS~
I have a hot date for Valentines day
And I plan to play with him all night
It'll be the best day ever
Maybe he'll let me bring my steamy friend along
And I can eat my friend as I play with him
Their names are Gameboy and Potato.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 80 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
February 8, 2014 7:24pm UTC

I'm not religious, but at the end of
my life I wouldn't mind hearing a
deep, resounding voice tell me
what it was I should have done.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 46 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
September 20, 2013 1:18am UTC

Girl: Ew. Hipster.
Me: Ugh. You're so conventional.
Girl: What?
Me: Ask Dora to teach you some new vocab next time she goes to your bridge.
Girl: Did you just... But... Uhm... Okay... (Walks away)

👍 this is good · read the comments · 47 points

* Sabaism *
posted a quote
December 5, 2013 3:32pm UTC

WARNING
If you dare come near me with Peroxide
When I have a cut
It WILL turn into World War 3.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 46 points

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Best Yey Quotes This Month