a letter that can't be received.
if you knew would things be different?
if i could have you sympathise with me, would i feel different?
cause right now, fallen tears only matter if they're yours.
anxiousness and the tight chest feeling is nothing for me
but when it's you, i need to be more understanding.
and i know you have trouble sleeping and you cry almost daily...but join the club.
this path goes both ways and we're both hurt people hurting eachother.
but i'm just sick of ignoring my feelings to make you happy.
it's not worth it to hate myself to make you proud of me.
i never liked community gatherings, i never liked how you favoured my eldest sister.
i never liked being your rock, the quiet one or the "good girl".
if being a doormat with no self respect is who i need to be to receive your love,
you can keep it.
Dudu*