I love him
I love everything about him, i love his blue eyes that change everyday, i love his blonde hair, i love his awkwardness. It makes me laugh, his laugh makes me smile, and his voice makes me happy. I love the thought of me and him being together, i love the stories he tells me, i love him sweetness. I love him, i love everything about him, i love how we know each other more than anyone knows, i love how i know him like the back of my hand, i love that he remembers conversations we had last year, i love him. I love him more than anyone can understand.

I hate him
I hate his lies, how he breaks my heart every chance he gets, I hate that he makes me fall in love with him over and over again and never catches me, i hate that he lies to me about loving me, and tells me it wasn't a lie, but he still hurts me, hell i hate that he hurts me. I hate how we can be perfect one day and not talking the next day, i hate that when i finally stopped talking to him, and he has to text me and make me miss him, i hate that he tells me hes sorry and how i never deserved what he did, and how i deserve better and he wants to be friends, but the next day he doesn't even want to talk to me, i hate that he thinks we can be friends after everything, i hate that i cant breathe when i think about him and everything he put me through, i hate the pain i get in my chest when i think about him, i hate how he treats me like he can do whatever he wants to me and ill be there waiting for him, i hate that i believe his lies and he tells me their the truth when i know their not. I hate that he thinks I'm dumb enough to believe what he tells me. I hate that he acts like he likes me for me, but he truly doesn't know me inside, just who i pretend to be, i hate that he doesn't know how much he hurt me, and how much hes hurting me. I hate that i cant get over him, i hate that we cant be together, i hate that every time i see him i fall back in love with him, and when i talk to him its worse. i hate that i want to tell him i love him everyday. I hate that i miss him so much, i hate that i cant get over everything, and i hate how hes the only one i want, the only one i want

My brain tells me
That you hate more than you love, give up, you gave him a year of your life and all he did was hurt you, Its time to give up, move on, and tell him goodbye. He doesn't deserve you, your heart doesn't deserve to be treated that way. Just leave him behind in your past and make him realize that he missed out on a girl that would of gave everything to be his anything, he gave up a girl that would of loved him till her last breathe, and he gave up a girl that was there, and would of loved him and would of cared.. a girl that he will never have again