Witty Profiles

menu
sign in or join

Quotes added on Monday, September 1 2014


  1. posted a quote
    January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC
    This quote does not exist.

  2. archi95 archi95
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:23am UTC
    If my soul was worthy of love, and if my life was pure, the sense of hidden gentleman will entices your heart and you will understand me .

  3. JustGabe JustGabe
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:29am UTC
    you have no effect on me because you are flat chested

  4. Gpc11 Gpc11
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:30am UTC
    This drunk guy claimed that he was George Washington. I asked him for two forms of ID. He pulled out a dollar and a quarter. He wins.

  5. Gpc11 Gpc11
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:32am UTC
    *inhales blunt*Is first degree murder in Fahrenheit or Celsius?*passes blunt to the left*

  6. JustGabe JustGabe
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:37am UTC
    I wanted to send you something s€xy but the mailman told me to get out of the postbox

  7. Gpc11 Gpc11
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:40am UTC
    "I'll be speaking with my lawyer" is the adult version of saying "I'm telling my mom"

  8. JustGabe JustGabe
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:41am UTC
    "Ladies first" is just a nice way of saying "let me look at your butt while you walk infront of me"

  9. JustGabe JustGabe
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:53am UTC
    That painting is large and unattractive. It reminds me of your mother

  10. JustGabe JustGabe
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:54am UTC
    "If you die, i will kill you"
    -my best friends logic

  11. JustGabe JustGabe
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:55am UTC
    person one: you tried peeking at me in the shower!
    person two: it's just natural curiosity towards the unknown!!

  12. JustGabe JustGabe
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 8:57am UTC
    look deep into my eyes and accept my sincere apology.
    Also, notice my handsome manly features

  13. Emma Is Not My Name* Emma Is Not My Name*
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 9:01am UTC
    Everything I touch turns to stone...

  14. *gloomy* *gloomy*
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 9:11am UTC
    "When I was a girl, my life was music that was always getting louder."
    ― Jonathan Safran Foer,
    Everything Is Illuminated

  15. Emma Is Not My Name* Emma Is Not My Name*
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 9:11am UTC
    Heaven's full and hell won't have me.

  16. Lil* Lil*
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 9:24am UTC
    Some people feel rainOthers get wet

  17. Gpc11 Gpc11
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 9:44am UTC
    So the chicken and the egg are lying in bed together. The chicken leans back and lights a cigarette and says “well, that answers that question.”

  18. Morgan* Morgan*
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 9:49am UTC
    That awkward moment when you're daydreaming and you smile like an ïðïöť, and then you realize you're in public.

  19. Gpc11 Gpc11
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 10:08am UTC
    -Has a son-Names him "The Roof"-Raises The Roof-Argues with wife about why the roof is on fire

  20. *blushes* *blushes*
    posted a quote
    September 1, 2014 10:28am UTC
    My interest in having friends is getting less every day.

:)

Join · Top Quotes · New Quotes · Random · Chat · Add Quote · Rules · Privacy Policy · Terms of Use · Full Site
© 2003-2024 Witty Profiles