black and blue
(chapter ten) DEAN'S POV I swallowed roughly. I beat her so bad she was left begging for her daddy to help her.Fυck, why couldn't she see I didn't want to do that to her?If she'd just...listen to me, if she'd just cooperate, everything would be fine.I paced and paced. I could hear her wailing and I was all the way upstairs.You went too far, you went way too far this time. She probably hates you. I laughed cynically, my laugh coming out ragged and loud. She already hates me. I rubbed my hand over my face. I walked down the stairs.She was curled up in a fetal position, trying to breathe normally. Her face was bloody. One eye was swelled shut. I turned my face away, unable to look.I walked towards her, trying to ignore the way she shifted away from me, turned her face away so she wouldn't have to look at my face. I tried to ignore the way my stomach dropped when she did that. The way my whole body felt like someone was kicking me because I'd put that fear in her eyes.I'd put those bruises on her body."Haden," I said gently.She flinched. I felt like throwing up. I knelt down next to her and I heard her whimper when I reached out. I paused, dropping my hand.I love you, I said silently. I reached out for her again and she tried to move away but it must've hurt because she let out a ragged moan of pain and clenched her jaw tightly. "Monster," she said, her voice hoarse. Her eyes were shutting. I saw red, anger boiling up in me. I swallowed it down, because it had to be her pain talking. She couldn't... she couldn't really think of me as a monster. "You're a monster," she said and blood dribbled down her chin.I got a flash of me hitting her in the side of her cheek, and the way she fell to the floor.My stomach flipped and I rushed towards the bathroom, just to lose everything I'd eaten that day in the toilet.I heaved and heaved, and then, finally, my stomach was empty.I saw blood on my knuckles and my stomach turned again because it wasn't my blood. It was Haden's.I scrubbed at my hands until they were red and raw.With my chest heaving up and down, I looked into the mirror.Empty blue eyes stared back at me. Flushed cheeks. Pale face.Monster. Monster. Monster.You're a monster.I kneeled down, my chest still heaving.I could hear her voice so clearly. You're a monster."I know," I coughed out. "I know I am."I could feel my eyes burning and I tried to stop it. I told myself to man up. I took deep breaths, again and again but I could still feel my eyes watering.The only time I'd ever cried was that first night I'd hit Haden. I had dropped her off at her house, not once looking at her, and then when I got home, I cried until I couldn't breathe.And now, sitting in my bathroom, I bowed my head and started to cry again.okay this is his point of view, but i don't know, i feel like i made him too soft.i'm really bad at guy's pov in the first place, but yeah tell me how it is!comment for a reminder ! :)
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