I have a theory about Taylor Swift. She's gonna date Ed Sheeran while they're on tour. But at the end she's gonna break up with him and write another boring/annoying song about how he ruined her life and such. But he's gonna write an album about how much of a b/tch she is and take all of her fame. And she'll be a nobody and her career will be over. no offense to the people who actually like her it was just a theory.
When i was in fourth grade we were doing a math lesson and all of a sudden the teachers like “Have you ever seen a pregnant bird?” And everyones just like “No.” And then she slams her hand on the table and screams: “THATS BECAUSE THEY DONT EXIST” AND ONE KID IN THE BACK JUST BLURTS OUT “WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH MATH?” tumblr
Me: Omg! Mom! The wifi in my room is not working! Mom: Come downstairs. Me: What? What is this downstairs you speak of? Mom: *raises an eyebrow* Mom: Where the kitchen is? Me: Oh.
That Cheerio Commercial Old Lady: Your cousin lives all the way in Baltimore! Baby: *reaches for cheerio* Old Lady: I live all the way in Hawaii Baby: *reaches for cheerio* Old Lady: And you, live in- Baby: JUST SHUT UP AND GIVE ME MY CHEERIO! *smacks old lady and grabs cheerio* Baby: *crawls into sunset*
Me: *walks into living room* Brother: Girls be diddyboppin on the corner for some foodstamps His friend: Yeah. They be getting them foodstamps Me: *walks out of living room*
Why I'm always in my room Me: *Downstairs on my laptop* My dog: *barking* My brother and his friend: *yelling* My mom: *TV on at full blast* Me: I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!! Me: *throws lamp* Me: *runs upstairs* Family: What's her problem?