Is it really too much to ask for a guy to like me for me?
I know i might not be drop dead gorgeous or #1 in all my classes.
I know i might be broken and shattered because of everthing that has ever happened to me.
I know if i lost a lot of weight maybe people would like me more.
I know that if i was more likable then people would like me more.
I know I'm not perfect.
But do people honestly think that they need to pick at every single one of my flaws?
I already do that WAY more than i should.
People have pushed me to the point of almost starving myself.
Even though he denies it the guy i had a huge crush on told me to cut myself three different times.
People insist on hurting me even though I'm already broken.
Guys won't even give me a second look because they don't look beyond appearance.
I'm strong and don't care on the outside but on the inside I'm so broken and tired.
Am i scared? Of course. I'm scared that i will never have my first kiss and no one will ever love me.
Believe it or not if you really try and get to know me i might surprise you.
When you really know me I'm funny and creative and have a great time.
I don't go off and do drugs or anything like that.
Even though I act like it doesn't bother me words pain me so much.
The worst part about that?
I remember close to EVERYTHING that has ever been said to me.
Whether it be about my weight, height, overall size, beauty, clothes, personality, everything.
I've never been allowed to be myself so I don't know who I am.
I'm so lost.
The girl who is strong broke.
Next year is going to be different.
I'm ready for it.
The abuse should I have to stand it.
I want to be the quiet girl who gets good grades and speaks my mind whatever it might be.
I care believe it or not.
It hurts, everything.
I don't want to be pittied, I just want people to know my story.
I want to be a writer and/or a forensic anthropologist/scientist.
My depression and hate and anger at everyone wont stop me.
I'll make myself proud because if you arent working for you than whats the point of working?
thanks for reading if you did.
fatallyattractive15023