chocolatementos's Favorites

chocolatementos

fishareawesome
posted a quote
October 9, 2012 1:08pm UTC

i upload a profile picture, so witty rubbs it in:
"Great, you look fabulous"

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 37 points

BlueSkiesAndSunshine
posted a quote
October 7, 2012 11:45am UTC

THE TRUTH ABOUT JIMMY365
Everyone knows Jimmy365, right? The awesome, sweet, nice, gay witty guy? The one that is really easy to talk to and gets a lot of top quotes. How would you like it if I told you he wasn't a guy? If any of you had taken the time to visit his tumblr (random-ly.tumblr.com) you would visit a nice page with some cute pictures and quotes. Then, if you would click on the link that says "About" you would find yourself at a page with a nice little profile summary. There are some cute pictures with "Blogs to follow" and "FAQs". The real shock comes when you read the "About Me" statement. I will copy it here for you to read:
Hi, my name is Joss. I'm a 15 year old girl.. My birthday is July 21st.. I like tumblr.. who doesn't? I'm obsessed with beauty, I'm fixated with perfection. If you'd like to talk, it would be awesome if you popped some words into my ask. p.s. i love you.
Some guy, right?
Hey everybdoy! This is jimmy365
I have to clear a few things up.
I am a guy and
my name is Jimmy and
I am gay.
Those are facts.
The tumblr link on my profile
is my cousin, Joss's tumblr.
She asked me to ask you all
to check it out if you could.
Anyone who says otherwise
does not have their facts straight.
Thank you for taking the time
to read and clarify.
Stay wonderful!
NOW YOU KNOW THE TRUTH ABOUT JIMMY365
Now tell me who's the bigger person here?

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blackangel39
posted a quote
March 7, 2012 12:26am UTC

Mom: What do you think? I'm made of Money!?
Me: Well isn't that what Mom stands for?
Made
Of
Money?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 15 points

Helloandhi
posted a quote
March 7, 2012 1:42am UTC

I bet you 1 $ That you would read this !
U Owe mehh... :/

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points

AustinH
posted a quote
February 27, 2012 5:19pm UTC

Me: Hey mom, need help with the dishes?
Mom: Oh no thank you honey. I have i t.
*10 minutes later*
Mom: I SWEAR I GET NO HELP AROUND THIS DAMN HOUSE!

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1852 points

rainbowlollystephix
posted a quote
March 15, 2011 10:29pm UTC

This is not the new layout.
Steve posted on facebook:
Sorry, friends. Someone got excited and pushed the wrong button on the witty profiles server. Some development display templates got pushed live by accident. It will likely take a few hours to straighten everything out, so finish your homework and go to bed early tonight. Witty will be back to normal tomorrow. >:(
Stop hating, old layout will be back!
notn notnotmyformat

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points

kandykyra
posted a quote
February 24, 2011 8:04pm UTC

Long but worth while...i promise
Her name was Abby
She was only five
This is what happened
When she was alive
Her dad was a drunk
Her mom was an addict
Her parents kept her
Locked in an attic
Her only friend
was a little toy bear
It was old and worn out
And had patches of hair
She always talked to it
When no one's around
She lays there and hugs it
Not a peep of sound
Until her parents
unlock the door
Some more and more pain
She'll have to endore
A bruise on her leg
A scar on her face
Why would she be
In such a horrible place?
But she grabs her bear
And softly crys
She loves her parents
But they want her to die
She sits in the corner
Quiet but thinking,
" God, why? Why is
My life always sinking? "
Such a bad life
For a sad little kid
She'd get beaten and beaten
For anything she did
Then one night
Her mom came home high
The poor child was hit and slapped
As hours went by
Then her mom suddenly
Grabbed for a blade
It was sharp and pointy
One that she made
She thrusted the blade
Right in her chest,
" You deserve to die
You worthless pest! "
The mom walked out
Leaving the girl slowly dying
She grabbed her bear
And again started crying
Police showed up
At the small little house
They quickly barged in
Everything was as quiet as a mouse
One officer slowly
Opened a door
To find the sad little girl
Lying on the floor
It must have been bad
To go through so much harm
But at least she died
With her best friend in her arms
Press the <3 if your against Child ABUSE

👍 this is good · read the comments · 10672 points

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chocolatementos