OhSnapItzJessa

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Member Since: 17 Apr 2012 09:15am

Last Seen: 1 May 2013 10:45pm

user id: 292979

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Hi I'm Jessa! :)
I make awesome quotes!

OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
December 5, 2012 6:38pm UTC

I just watched a film where a mans wife is brutally murdered by a serial killer and his son is left physically disabled. In a twisted turn of events his son is kidnapped and he has to chase the
kidnapper thousands of
miles with the help of a mentally disabled woman.
...What was it called?
FINDING NEMO

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
December 5, 2012 5:44pm UTC

Pshhhhh, no...I would never Google my teachers..........
thats um creepy i guess, if you say so.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
November 19, 2012 1:43pm UTC

I thought I was at a Nicki Minaj concert for 20 minutes...
then I realized I was watching a homeless man scream at a pigeon.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points

OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
October 25, 2012 1:07pm UTC

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
October 25, 2012 12:58pm UTC

My fake plant died because I forgot to pretend to water it :(

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
May 16, 2012 1:31pm UTC

Dance Instructor: Stop, stop. Lilo, why are you all wet?
Lilo: It's sandwich day. [sighs] Every Thursday I take Pudge the fish a peanut butter sandwich.
Dance Instructor: Pudge is a fish...?
Lilo: [continues] And today we were out of peanut butter. So I asked my sister what to give him and she said a tuna sandwich! I can't give Pudge tuna! [whispers] Do you know what tuna is?
Dance Instructor: Fish?
Lilo: [yells] It's FISH! If I gave Pudge tuna, I'd be an abomination. I'm late because I had to go to the store, and get peanut butter, 'cause all we have, IS-IS STINKIN' TUNA!
Dance Instructor: Lilo. Why is this so important?
Lilo: [Seriously] Pudge controls the weather.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
May 9, 2012 10:05am UTC

I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
May 4, 2012 1:50pm UTC

You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She’s 97 today and we don’t know where the hell she is.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
May 2, 2012 9:47am UTC

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
May 2, 2012 7:52am UTC

Jennifer Lopez's kids names are Max and Emmy.....Sound familiar? like a show with dragons in dragonland?
she must really like dragon tales

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
May 1, 2012 11:34am UTC

ME:"Everyone is entitled to their own opinion."
MY SISTER: "Thank you"
ME: It's just that yours is stupid.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
May 1, 2012 10:15am UTC

that moment when your teacher calls on you when you aren't paying attention....

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
April 28, 2012 10:41pm UTC

fave if dance is your passion <3

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
April 27, 2012 1:20pm UTC

Kelso, reading the UNICEF box: "A UNICEF contribution of thirteen cents will feed a child for a month." Man, living in Africa must be great! Everything's so cheap!

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
April 27, 2012 8:07am UTC

do birds play angry people?
the world will never know.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
April 26, 2012 1:06pm UTC

Only in America...
...do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering
...can pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance
...are there handicap parking places right in front of ice skating rinks
...do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions, while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front
...do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a Diet Coke
...do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters
...do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage
...do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight and buns in packages of 10
...do we use the word 'politics' to describe the process so well: 'Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures'
Fave if you agree :D

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 8 points

OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
April 26, 2012 12:52pm UTC

You're the friend I'd feel worst about killing in a post-apocalyptic death match for food.

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
April 26, 2012 11:03am UTC

when you think you didn't do too badly on a test, then you find out you bombed it completely.....

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
April 25, 2012 1:53pm UTC

why are math books so sad???
because they have so many problems! :D

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OhSnapItzJessa
posted a quote
April 25, 2012 11:52am UTC

"Please raise your hand if you have ever felt personally victimized by Regina George"
-Mean Girls

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OhSnapItzJessa