Witty Profiles

lithium*

1. lithium*
   posted a quote
   November 18, 2013 3:00pm UTC
   Hey guys
   I probably don’t have any right doing this but what the heck
   Witty just sucks a lot right now and its quite an unhappy place for me,
   I think its time for me to stop posting quotes
   You guys have been great but, honestly, there’s hardly any good content on witty and I really don’t have time for it anymore.
   Ill be on my other account (balaclava) every so often ((If u want ill give u my kik too))
   Thanks so much for the time, I love you lots. Be nice to each other.
   Love u all continue being cool! ! :*
   rachael
   (im filing this under break up but i still love u)
   rachae
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 13 points
2. lithium*
   posted a quote
   October 25, 2013 7:33pm UTC
   "all pop music is autotuned trash"
   sorry I can't hear you over how much more fun my life is than yours
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 48 points
3. lithium*
   posted a quote
   October 19, 2013 5:50pm UTC
   Tity boi (2 Chainz
   @2chainz
   Follow
   )
   She got a big booty so I call her Janessa. Cause that's her name. It's disrespectful to objectify women.
   ********* please do not remove the credit, this format was made by petrichor :-) ALSO DO NOT REMOVE THIS PART EITHER BECAUSE THIS IS THE CREDIT TOO OKAY
   ← Reply
   ↵ Retweet
   ★ Favorite
   ••• More
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 72 points
4. lithium*
   posted a quote
   October 19, 2013 5:18pm UTC
   i literally never had a stage where i thought boys were icky and gross
   i've literally been chasin the d since fresh out the womb
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 241 points
5. lithium*
   posted a quote
   October 17, 2013 6:31pm UTC
   Has your friend been sneezing louder lately?
   Keep a close on on them, your friend may be suffering from a rare disorder called DADNESS
   If you notice that your friend has been
   -wearing polo shirts
   -enjoying horrific puns
   -and been generally embarrassing
   SEEK HELP NOW!!
   In rare cases, your friend may even reply to statements like, 'I'm cold', or 'I'm hungry'
   with uproarious laughter and the words 'hi cold, i'm...'
   IF YOUR FRIEND HAS REACHED THIS STAGE, IT MAY BE TOO LATE.
   PLEASE STOP THIS HORRIBLE DISORDER FROM SPREADING.
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 44 points
6. lithium*
   posted a quote
   October 12, 2013 8:12pm UTC
   do kids still have lemonade stands anymore or do they just go straight to dealing
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 105 points
7. lithium*
   posted a quote
   October 12, 2013 7:59pm UTC
   [christopher columbus arrives in america]
   "lol first!!1!" he writes in the sand
   
   👍 this is good · read the comments · 73 points
8. lithium*
   posted a quote
   October 12, 2013 5:20pm UTC
   Panic! In the American Government:
   Shutting Down the Government is the Most Fun White Men Can Have Without Coming to a Compromise
   The Only Difference Between Throwing A Temper Tantrum And Shutting Down The Government Is Press Coverage
   There’s A Good Reason The Congress Seats Are Empty Honey, We Just Haven’t Thought Of It Yet
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 27 points
9. lithium*
   posted a quote
   October 11, 2013 7:31pm UTC
   [80s montage of me not doing my homework]
   
   👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 29 points
10. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 7, 2013 5:17pm UTC
    if you hate all dance tracks because you only listen to songs with "meaning"
    then you can sit alone with your "deeper than your average teen" butt while I am at the local function making manoeuvres both physically and mentally on your boyfriend
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 19 points
11. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 7, 2013 5:12pm UTC
    sometimes i scroll down the 'people you follow' page and i think
    yes
    i have chosen these people wisely
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 58 points
12. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 7, 2013 5:03pm UTC
    [strums guitar] so yeah, this is a little song I wrote called 'cute boys'.
    It goes a little like this [metal-core screech] [destroys guitar] [cries]
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 91 points
13. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 5, 2013 8:41pm UTC
    straight boys are real, and they are dangerous
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points
14. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 5, 2013 8:34pm UTC
    me trying to think of a comeback: your mom your mom your mom your mom did i mention your mom
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 26 points
15. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 4, 2013 8:08pm UTC
    me: I'm cold
    dad: hi cold, I'm dad
    *dads of the world unite in uproarious laughter*
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 253 points
16. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 4, 2013 8:02pm UTC
    the people who use the 'xD' face are still young and full of happiness. do not rain on their parade
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 73 points
17. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 4, 2013 8:00pm UTC
    [walks into school and inhales deeply]
    ah yes the sweet smell of high stress levels and a flawed education system
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 152 points
18. lithium*
    posted a quote
    October 4, 2013 7:57pm UTC
    yeah, my life is rated R
    for Really boring
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 69 points
19. lithium*
    posted a quote
    September 27, 2013 8:36pm UTC
    [posts opinion on the internet]
    [other internet users inhale the air deeply] do I smell... difference in thinking?
    [the ground begins to rumble as all internet users with opinions roll in from the hills, daylight is lost, destroying everything in their path. They advance on the innocent but opinionated soul, bearing truncheons and charging using bats and chrome bars. The pundit cowers in fear as he looks to the post he made earlier with haunted eyes. what has he done.]
    
    👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 31 points
20. lithium*
    posted a quote
    September 27, 2013 8:03pm UTC
    personal ad: ugly girl seeking attractive boy for cuddles and constant attention. hobbies include overeating and crying when i fail a level in candy crush saga. contact me
    
    👍 this is good · read the comments · 47 points

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