I'm not going to tell you my name,
You can just call me Diei.
One thing, I am an active day dreamer.
It takes up most of my day,
I go to a super small charter school.
there are only about 16 students in my grade.
People call my group of friends "the nerds" and I think thats really sad
considering one of us is failing almost every class.
I am kind of smart, I get refered to as the "Head-Nerd"
I honestly love the look the teachers give me when I get the answer to a question that was suppose to be really hard, seconds after they ask it.
I enjoy the simple things in life:
I.e. Knitting, reading, nature etc...
I come from a very redneck family, and even though I don't mind getting dirty it is not how i want to spend my day most of the time.
I babysit all the time, small children are absolutely my life!
(No, i do not want to have a baby right now, let me finish high school first!)
And well I guess that's me.
I thought it was going to be hard. I thought you were still ignoring me. I didn't think you would want to talk to me. Instead I walked in today and I saw your face light up as you came to stand by me. You asked me how I was doing. You told me I was a good friend to have. You made me feel okay today.
I do not dread having to get up early and go to school, I don't mind homework, I do not really care that i have to sit in class all day. The only thing I'm not looking forward to is you: seeing you happy with someone else, you treating me like nothings changed between us even though everything has I don't want to see you. I dont want to talk to you. Actually that's not true. I do, because I care about you and I love you. But its become too hard for me to put my heart out there for you so that you can crush it. I'm sorry but I can't anymore.
Yesterday in chemistry we had this quiz on the laws of thermoynamics. We were only suppose to write down two of them, but we got extra credit if we wrote down the others. The teacher started handing out pieces of paper to the 16 students in my class, I was the second one to get a piece of paper, and I managed to finish writing all of them down, along with my name and the date before the teacher had finished giving everyone a piece of paper. When I exclaimed "Okay, done!" The only person who wasn't surprised was the cool guy whom I have a crush on and his response to everyone asking "what? How?" was "Come on guys, does this really surprise you?" Today we got our tests back. . . I got all of them correct.
I was hanging with a couple friends and my crush, and two of my friends and my crush were being VERY innapropriate so my friend turned to and asked, "Why are you friends with him." ("Him" refering to my crush). And he looked up and said; "Because we have our benefits." and then he winked. I was speechless. Seriously, what do you even say to that?
My mom has always said that she wont ever let me have a sleepover at a boys house. It has always been one of theose things she felt like telling me at least once everyday. Well guess what happened on thursday? Yep, had a sleepover at my best guy friends house with my moms permission. She totally broke all of her rules by allowing me to go and I didnt even have to beg. I thought it was pretty awesome. Nothing happened while i was over there of course but yeah it was still really cool and surprising that my mom let me go.
So about a year ago this dog scratched my hand and left three about an inch long scars that are really close to my wrist. No one has ever seemed to notice them and I have really almost forgotten they were there. Earlier today I was sitting next to my friend Rayce and him and I were just talking and he suddenly reached across and grabbed my hand. He slowly ran his fingers across the scars and just stared at them for a couple minutes. I tried to take my hand back and he told me to wait. I sat there and watched him look at my hand, finally he looked up at me and asked how I had gotten them, I told him they were from a dog and just kind of shook it off. He nodded and turned back towards the front of the room. For the rest of the day everything was normal. During lunch I was talking to his sister (She is a year younger than us and she is a good friend of mine) and I told her all that had gone on with her brother, and told her it was really weird. And she stopped for a minute and looked down at her lap and was just playing with her thumbs, (this is a girl that is normally very upbeat and very happy and the sudden change in behavior really shocked me.) I asked her what had happened and she just started to role the sleeves of her jacket up. "Christine," She said, "last night My brother found out I have been cutting." I looked at her wrists and they were covered in marks. Her and I sat there and talked for a bit before I went and found her brother. I looked at him and I said "I know Sam is cutting." He looked back at me, "Yeah, Sorry about being so weird earlier, its just, I know one important girl in my life feels useless and broken, I needed to know if the other one did as well."