Best Imserious Quotes This Month

yourcool
posted a quote
May 5, 2013 1:07am UTC

my grandmother gave me twizzlers for
for getting accepted into college and choosing the college i will be going to in the fall.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 67 points

thatswutshesaid
posted a quote
April 21, 2013 7:28pm UTC

does anyone else ever wonder
how many strangers' pictures you're in the background of?

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yourcool
posted a quote
July 10, 2013 11:56pm UTC

i texted my grandfather, "hey grampie i'm
quitting softball. i'm not gonna be her benchwarmer." and he texts back within two minutes and says "atta girl."

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 43 points

DeathOfASon
posted a quote
July 24, 2013 11:06pm UTC

We have stereotypes for aliens
We have stereotypes for things we don't even know anything about.
Just let that sink in.

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hermione23katniss
posted a quote
June 4, 2013 11:19pm UTC

Me reading the top quotes section on Witty:
Me: Hey I saw that on tumblr
Me: I also saw that on tumblr
Me: I've definitely seen this on tumblr
Me: Oh look some variety- this one is from twitter
Me: another quote from tumblr
Me: If I see one more quote from tumblr I swear...
Me: that's it i'm done with reading this *gets off witty*
Can we please have some more originality??

👍 this is good · read the comments · 40 points

abigaail
posted a quote
April 12, 2013 6:43pm UTC

if steroids are illegal for athletes,
then Photoshop should be illegeal for models.

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๑°`°º¤ø тнe_ιмpoѕѕιвle_gιrl_wнo_waιтed ø¤º°`°๑ *
posted a quote
December 15, 2013 7:40am UTC

Google
Kermit the frog
kermit the frog as a pimp
kermit the frog wrecking ball
kermit the frog thong
kermit the frog on a disco ball
...I'm scared to click any of them...

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marie1616
posted a quote
April 30, 2013 12:22am UTC

I came into this world covered in someone elses blood and screaming, let me tell you, I ain't afraid to leave it the same way.

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doublesidedice
posted a quote
November 5, 2013 6:29pm UTC

I just don't get what you see in me...

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abigaail
posted a quote
June 7, 2013 5:20pm UTC

There is a movie about a murderous car tire named Robert,
and the entire movie is the tire rolling around,killing people, and blowing things up.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 15 points

Amenah

posted a quote
April 13, 2015 9:30pm UTC

i want some penpals.
I'm serious. Written communication is important. And I think witty is perfect for it. I'm talking hand-written letters,
photographs in envelopes, regular communication, getting to know another person. If you're interested,
comment. Or maybe you don't want to talk to me -- look around the comments and see if there's someone
else who you could try with. Or write a penpal quote of your own. Take this format, I don't mind. But try writing
someone a letter, okay? One that shows off your awful hand-writing, that takes a good hour or more, one you
can keep in a box and look at for years go come. The internet is amazing, but you do lose something if you
don't look outside it. (i may come after your butt if you don't comment jsyk, you guys know who you are)
UK = perfect. Somewhere else? We can make it work.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 32 points

Halo Angel1*
posted a quote
October 16, 2013 3:02pm UTC

I never run with scissors. Those last two words were unnecessary.

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DestinyCaribou
posted a quote
June 7, 2014 4:31am UTC

boys when they first see me: "oh she's kinda cute"
boys when they find out about my personality: "i can work with this"
boys when they find out i'm secretly a gamer: "right okay um......"
boys when they meet my attractive friends: "bye b*tch"

👍 this is good · read the comments · 16 points

pluto*
posted a quote
March 25, 2013 7:00pm UTC

LISTEN HERE LITTLE FU^K
IM NOT GOOGLE, YOU CAN'T COME TO ME ONLY WHEN YOU NEED HELP AND THEN LEAVE ONCE YOU HAVE IT!
OKAY? OKAY.

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yourcool
posted a quote
July 2, 2013 8:34pm UTC

In case any of you were wondering, here's an update on my life:
My mom is doing better, I suppose. She's starting to eat more. But, she's still sick.
And I met a guy recently and we had clicked so well, that only after about an hour of knowing each other, about a handful of people that we didn't know well had come up to the two of us and said "you guys are so cute and amazing together. how long have you two been with each other?"

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abigaail
posted a quote
April 29, 2013 4:38pm UTC

Sometimes I think to myself, 'do i really want to buy another chocolare bar?'
And then i remember that there is a suoer volcano under Yellowstone that is 40,000 years overdue and when it erruots it could potentially cover most of North America in ash and create acolcanic winter that kills half the worlds population
And then Im like, heck yeah i want that chocolate bar

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points

marie1616
posted a quote
April 25, 2013 6:15pm UTC

I don't care if you're a virgin, if you've slept with 10+ guys, if you're really young, if you wear short shorts, if you wear push up bras that push your breasts to your chin, if you wear short skirts, if you take n/de photos or if you wear make-up. But touch the guy I like and I'll have to cut your hands off.

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Livy*
posted a quote
April 13, 2013 3:45pm UTC

I'm a girl.
Don't touch my hair, face, phone, or boyfriend.
I will hurt you.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points

CharliesTheName
posted a quote
October 20, 2013 5:47pm UTC

I love how my Google Chrome homepage
has Witty Profiles titled as
"Oops! Google Chrome Couldn't Load the Page"

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 11 points

sophxoxo
posted a quote
August 13, 2013 1:35pm UTC

I'm so tired of people putting a quote in every category so that more people see it and they get more faves. i dont want to hear a joke when im depressed. so can you guys please stop and use witty right? thanks

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