author's Favorites

coolcori97
posted a quote
April 5, 2011 9:51pm UTC

We aren't steve's
only project
http://www.degraeve.com/
just saying

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clueless1212
posted a quote
September 1, 2011 4:19pm UTC

Dear Ads on Witty,
Stop trying to look like a quote,
you're not.
Sincerely,
Almost tried to "Get Code"
♥

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XxprettixX
posted a quote
October 26, 2011 1:08pm UTC

Format by XxprettixX
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
In 2nd grade, they called me a "smarty pants"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
in 9th grade they called me a "nerd" "kiss up" and
"teachers pet"
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
but now, they call me
BOSS.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Format by XxprettixX Removal of this credit is punishable by death.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 3246 points

kaila*
posted a quote
December 10, 2011 1:11pm UTC

credit: confessions_of_a_cutter
If couples who are in love are called "love birds".
Then couples who always argue should be called "angry birds".

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 449 points

EmilyxLovesxU
posted a quote
February 27, 2012 12:38pm UTC

NERD WEDDING: Instead of saying “I do.”
They say “I accept the terms & conditions.”

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 72 points

kd00
posted a quote
April 30, 2012 4:11pm UTC

I just lost my mood ring...
not sure how I feel about this
format by kd00

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 532 points

cutie_pie1234
posted a quote
December 8, 2011 1:24am UTC

“They say you die twice. One time when you stop breathing and a second time, a bit later on, when somebody says your name for the last time.”

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 17 points

Dont_Let_Me_Fall
posted a quote
July 13, 2012 5:40pm UTC

I wanna start a band called 'Pangea' just so we can break up..

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 31 points

Kizzie29
posted a quote
August 17, 2012 5:42pm UTC

Dear steve,
Teenage grls can multi-task, but holding horses, cooling jets, and simmering down is a bit too much to ask from socially awkward potatoes
Sincerely, every tired out wittian.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 311 points

MasterSword
posted a quote
August 13, 2012 12:44pm UTC

Corny joke 2#♥
How Did the butcher introduce his wife?
Meat patty.

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ICONiac
posted a quote
August 20, 2012 8:29pm UTC

You know you're a 90's kid when
your birth certificate says 1990-99

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__loveistragic
posted a quote
April 6, 2013 1:53am UTC

I miss you so damn much
please tell me you miss me too
please..

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Breeze
posted a quote
October 18, 2012 7:10pm UTC

palm
thumb
point
middle
ring
pink
Good Luck
DIRECTION
PROVOKE
love
Promise
weheartitCoding by Breeze

👍 this is good · read the comments · 550 points

yourcool
posted a quote
October 22, 2012 7:12pm UTC

when i laugh at jokes on the internet,
i don't even laugh. i just blow more air out of my nose than usual.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 1186 points

animallovers46

posted a quote
October 23, 2012 9:52pm UTC

People who sleep in socks must be very very small.

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SeaTurtle29
posted a quote
October 27, 2012 12:13am UTC

The wedding was very emotional
even the cake was in tiers

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CalifornaGirl16
posted a quote
November 7, 2012 3:36am UTC

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Stupid, Cheesy Jokes #342
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
A fsh.
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••

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Onism*
posted a quote
November 13, 2012 4:27pm UTC

My purse is like an onion.
When I open it, I cry.

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Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
January 30, 2013 1:15pm UTC

We're literally random people around the world sitting on the internet
telling bad jokes to each other. Why is this the most important thing I've got going on?

👍 this is good · read the comments · 395 points

roseth0rn
posted a quote
February 2, 2013 9:14am UTC

If you are depressed, you are living in the past.
If you are anxious, you are living the future.
If you are at peace, you are living in the present.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 33 points

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