Shawty123's Favorites

Shawty123

伤*
posted a quote
September 18, 2013 2:34pm UTC

GUYS HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG
SOMETHING THEY SAID
CAN STAY IN A GIRLS MIND

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SportsLover004
posted a quote
April 29, 2013 1:31pm UTC

*when i wake up*
me: i'm so tired.
*when i leave for school*
me: i'm so tired.
*when i'm having lunch*
me: i'm so tired.
*when i have lessons*
me: i'm so tired.
*when school finishes*
me: i'm so tired.
*when i'm doing homework*
me: i'm so tired
*when i'm having tea*
me: i'm so tired.
*when i'm watching tv*
me: i'm so tired.
*when i'm in bed*
me: ...
me: WELL WHO'S READY TO PARTAAAY.

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Steve
posted a quote
March 1, 2013 4:38pm UTC

"Out of the people that ever were, almost all of them are dead. There are way more dead people, and you're all gonna die and then you're gonna be dead for way longer than you're alive. Like that's mostly what you're ever gonna be. You're just dead people that didn't die yet." — comedian Louis C.K.

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dolph*
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 5:25pm UTC

All men are the same?
Excuse me.
But who made Witty Profiles?

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jimmy365
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 6:57pm UTC

normal person: sings lyrics
me: sings lyrics
sings backup vocals
sings guitar riffs
air-drums entire song
headbangs
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5 | f u n n i e s

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Eli22b
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 3:09pm UTC

Me: I should really get started on my homework.
Witty: lol nope
Wattpad: lol nope
Facebook: lol nope
YouTube: lol nope
Twitter: lol nope.
Netflix: lol nope
Fridge: lol nope
Sleep: lol nope
Me: Whats this homework thing you speak of?

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jimmy365
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 5:38pm UTC

my hobbies include
somehow forgetting to eat like all
day and then consuming 2000 calories
in a 30 minute period
f o r m a t j i m m y 3 6 5 | f u n n i e s

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dolph*
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 1:47pm UTC

I was sitting in the library and an attractive boy was staring at me and smiling, so I decided I had to do something about it. So I write my name and number on a piece of paper, fold it up, put it in my pocket, and decide when he gets up to leave, I'll hand it to him.
He gets up to leave so I walk over and hand him the paper. He looks a bit confused but he smiles and takes it, and I walked away and sat down feeling like a boss for about 5 minutes. Then I reach into my pocket and find a bit of paper with my name and number on. And realize that I'd actually given him a receipt from a Tesco meal deal.
I'm as smooth as a razor honestly.

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Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
January 16, 2013 8:08am UTC

A brief summary of each Disney princess:
Snow White:
-She's only 14 years old
-She's searching for her true love
-Seriously, though, she'd be, like, a freshman in high school
-She lives with 7 men. Deal with it.
-She pretty much trusts anyone
-She gets random animals to do her chores
-She doesn't believe in washing her fruit before she eats it
Cinderella:
-She's19 years old
-She hangs out with mice
-They make all her dresses
-She's treated like a slave by her family
-She has a BAMF fair godmother
-She's the queen of "if the shoe fits"
-Has anybody ever seen the sequels?
-Seriously, am I the only one?
Aurora:
-Aouurrooouuurra
-She's 16
-She sleeps through the entire movie
-Honestly, that's all I know
-Trust me, her fate is a lot worse in the original story. Look it up!
Ariel:
-She is also 16 years old
-She is a hoarder
-Screw destiny, she's a rebel
-How the heck did she have a kid?
-Oh, did I mention that she's a mermaid?
Belle:
-She's 17 years old
-She wants adventure in the great white somewhere
-She loves books but lets a sheep take a bite out of one
-Doesn't take attitude from anyone
-She's just awesome, alright?
Jasmine:
-She's almost 16
-Seriously, Jafar is trying to seduce a 15 year old. And Aladdin is 18, so if anything happens between them, there could be trouble
-Sneaks out at night
-She's considered Disney's first "ethnic" princess
Pocahontas:
-She's 18 years old
-Seriously, this entire movie is WRONG on so many levels. It is really historically inaccurate
-She doesn't even end up marrying John Smith
-She has a pet raccoon
-Her best friend is a tree
-She also has a sequel
Fa Mulan:
-Is as swift as a coursing river
-With all the force of a great typhoon
-And all the rage of a raging fire
-She's mysterious as the dark side of the moon
-Seriously, she's a BAMF
-She's also a cross-dresser
-DISHONOR ON YOUR COW
Tiana:
-Not a lot of people know her
-Her ethnicity has been met with mixed reviews
-She turns into a frog
-She's a works a lot
-I want her food
Merida:
-If yeh had theh chance teh change yeh fate,woullllld yeh?
Rapunzel:
-She is eighteen
-She has bad hair days
-She's us
-Seriously, guys
-She. Is. Us.

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happiest*
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 10:44am UTC

Let's face it.
Witty Profiles has the weirdest adds on earth.

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savannarosee
posted a quote
January 14, 2013 10:01pm UTC

Plot twist: Victoria's Secret is that she's a virgin.

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cupcake_lover88
posted a quote
January 14, 2013 10:07pm UTC

Not that any of you would care... but my dad just died fighting for our country......

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posted a quote
January 1, 1970 12:00am UTC

This quote does not exist.

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ErinIsTheName*
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 5:27pm UTC

Dear family,
Just because I'm laughing
when I'm reading a text,
doesnt been I'm flirting with
someone.
Sincerely,
Every teenage girl.

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animallovers46
posted a quote
January 15, 2013 3:56pm UTC

A good friend can finish your sentences. A best friend will do the same, but make it sound 10x dirtier in the process.

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Cammie
posted a quote
January 14, 2013 9:47pm UTC

Am I the only one who is seeing these Christian Mingle ad's everywhere

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the_story_left_untold
posted a quote
January 14, 2013 10:38pm UTC

Plot Twist: Steve is Jenna Marbles

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lacrosse2
posted a quote
January 14, 2013 10:01pm UTC

So today is my 15th birthday and guess what the best part was??
I finally got him
❤✌☝❤

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伤*
posted a quote
January 5, 2013 12:24pm UTC

WMYB: "You're turning heads when you walk through the do-o-or"
More Than This: "And as I walk up to your door my head turns to face the floor" Moments: "Shut the door, turn the light off"
She's Not Afraid: "But every time I tell her that I want more, she closes the door" Loved You First: "Knocking on your door and kissing you on the mouth"
Still The One: "Now I'm back at your door, you're looking at me unsure"
Change My Mind: “As I’m walking towards the do-o-or, I’m not sure”
The boys obviously like to sing about doors

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phee
posted a quote
January 6, 2013 10:56am UTC

after school holidays when you pick up your pen and your just like
"how do you use this?"
anyone else?

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