Everybodydotheflop's Favorites

happiest*
posted a quote
October 16, 2013 2:24pm UTC

maybe i can watch this hour long movie in ten minutes

👍 this is good · read the comments · 133 points

Hale_Storm18
posted a quote
October 15, 2013 10:19am UTC

This is an actual radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. Radio conversation released by the chief of naval operations, 10.10.1995.
Canadians: Please divert your course 15 defrees to the south to avoid a collision.
Americans: Reommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision.
Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.
Americans: This is the captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course.
Canadians: No, I say again, you divert YOUR course.
Americans: This is the Aircraft Carrier US LINCOLN, the second largest ship in the United States Atalantic Fleet. We are accompanied with three Destroyers, three Cruisers and numerous support vessels. I DEMAND that you change our course 15 degrees north. I say again, that's one-five degrees north, or counter measures will e undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.
Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call

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Chris*
posted a quote
October 14, 2013 6:48pm UTC

come as you are, as you were,
>> as i want you to be

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flyingbacon7
posted a quote
October 14, 2013 5:26pm UTC

Music
Is my escape
To a whole different world
A world with no pain
A world where everything is right
A world where I am actually happy

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flyingbacon7
posted a quote
October 14, 2013 10:43pm UTC

People:What song are you listening to?
Me: Names the song
People: I never heard of it. Who sings it?
Me: Names the artist
People: I never heard of them
This is why I do not get along with society

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sheilaway
posted a quote
October 15, 2013 2:48pm UTC

I find it hilarious how the stereotype is that women are more likely to faint at the sight of blood than men.
Like, do you know what happens each month?

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 3 points

asianmayonnaise
posted a quote
October 15, 2013 4:19pm UTC

you know that mood you get in sometimes where you are just in love with drinking water

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dragonfly26
posted a quote
October 13, 2013 4:15pm UTC

Waiter: What can I get you today?
Me: A cute boyfriend with extra personality and a side of chivalry
Waiter: Anything else?
Me: A life

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 7 points

breezy_mac
posted a quote
October 13, 2013 5:04am UTC

WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY?

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Ofwgkta*
posted a quote
October 13, 2013 6:46am UTC

I approached a kid
and asked "What is love?"
the kid answered "Love is when a puppy licks your face"
I laughed, but then he added "even after you left him ALONE all day."

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 5 points

Chris*
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 3:31pm UTC

i'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 29 points

Cammie
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 9:04pm UTC

greys anatomy is so weird
why do they have conversations in the middle of a surgery..

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happiest*
posted a quote
October 12, 2013 2:17pm UTC

u never truly appreciate how nice it is to be able to breathe through your nose until u get a cold

👍 this is good · read the comments · 284 points

imperfect *
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 8:31am UTC

"you ask!"
"no you ask!"
" plz just ask?"
"why can't you do it?"
"fine...excuse me,can we have some ketchup?"

👍 this is good · read the comments · 65 points

jennydoee
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 8:34am UTC

Me: Can I use the bathroom?
Teacher: I don't know, can you?
Me: When I was using "can" I was using its
secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission,
as opposed to expressing an ability.
I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that.
My bad. MAY I use the restroom?
Teacher: ...

👍 this is good · read the comments · 49 points

kaaarolcia
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 10:03am UTC

so many stupid people
not enough ammo

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zeel7
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 10:16am UTC

Where can you buy a boyfriend?
eboy.
Amanzon has more variety, though.

👍 this is good · read the comments · 120 points

ari_cournoyer
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 10:30am UTC

guy asks friend: "should i break up with my girlfriend? she's getting kinda fat.."
friend replies: "oh. YES. she deserves wayy better than you."
guy doesn't respond.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 28 points

dumb_blonde1998
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 10:36am UTC

Dear facebook,
I do not have a 'mom' therefore I shall not 'like' posts that say
"Like this if you love your mom. Ignore if you want your mom to die."
Sincerely British girls.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 29 points

ICantWaitToHATEYou
posted a quote
October 11, 2013 11:19am UTC

A push up bra is like a bag of crisp. You open it and its half
empty.

👍 this is good · comment on this quote · 4 points

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